Unregistered
02-04-2018, 02:16 PM
I was violently raped as a child. Just gonna come forth and say it. I wasn’t just diddled or tickled, I got full on butt raped. By my grandfather. I was only 6. It was really hard to live with myself for several years. I spent a lot of time in my room, closed off from everyone. I fetishized old men to cope with the pain of being raped. I contemplated suicide in the most gruesome ways possible.
But in 2005, my life changed. I was raped again. Only this time it wasn’t so bad. I was able to endure it because my grandfather let me play Shadow of the Colossus while he gave it to me. It was almost like he wasn’t even there. I was so engrossed in the game’s vast and mysterious world it didn’t matter anymore. In fact I almost became more immersed because the shaking of the colossi was synchronized with each pelvic thrust into my rear.
In this world, I could conquer the beasts. In this word I was a warrior. There was only one true colossus I had left to defeat. My grandfather. After several sessions of playing the game, and my grandfather being right there behind me, I was finally able to beat it. A few months later, my mother tells me that pappy has cancer. I was overfilled with joy. I was finally free. When he passed away, I felt a little bit of my soul had chipped away, but it was necessary. Sometimes I still hear the creaks in the floorboard, I see a dark silhouette of a man creeping around at the side of my eye. I feel his presence. His aura. His darkness. Because in those long nights in my dimly lit room, I was the boy, and he was the Shadow of the Colossus.
But in 2005, my life changed. I was raped again. Only this time it wasn’t so bad. I was able to endure it because my grandfather let me play Shadow of the Colossus while he gave it to me. It was almost like he wasn’t even there. I was so engrossed in the game’s vast and mysterious world it didn’t matter anymore. In fact I almost became more immersed because the shaking of the colossi was synchronized with each pelvic thrust into my rear.
In this world, I could conquer the beasts. In this word I was a warrior. There was only one true colossus I had left to defeat. My grandfather. After several sessions of playing the game, and my grandfather being right there behind me, I was finally able to beat it. A few months later, my mother tells me that pappy has cancer. I was overfilled with joy. I was finally free. When he passed away, I felt a little bit of my soul had chipped away, but it was necessary. Sometimes I still hear the creaks in the floorboard, I see a dark silhouette of a man creeping around at the side of my eye. I feel his presence. His aura. His darkness. Because in those long nights in my dimly lit room, I was the boy, and he was the Shadow of the Colossus.