UNGENERIC SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD PARODY U*L*T*R*A*THREAD - happy birthday desolation <3 <3 <3

[rubycalaber]

Director's Commentary: considered leaving this poster until the end of the thread so it doesn't spoil which users are included but since literally every poster to ever register an account on any kind of vaugely related ytmnd forum is here fuck it

also I was going to put a foreword here explaining this thread's production history (aka how it took me 13 years to make lmao) but of course it turned into a massive wall of text so I changed it to an afterword at the end but basically this is a tribute to the whole ytmnd and related spin-offs community, the rubynet users who for some reason posted on my forums, the general internet culture I grew up in and of course the lovely Desolation who's truly my Ramona, and if you're not included... boy howdy are you a no-namer!

HIT CTRL + A TO READ THE HIDDEN "DIRECTORS COMMENTARY" TEXT!

Director's Commentary: if you're reading this on a phone uhhh idk what you even do to highlight hidden text, the idea for explaining all the in-jokes and memes contained within this tome of tism came from author Jess Nevins great work annotating the incredibly dense with obscure fiction and real world references comic League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, I'm glad I did it because I legit forget what half this shit is in reference to and it makes for a great reference guide for forum drama lol, if you want to read the entire Director's Commentary because you're completely insane I'd say read it normally first, you can tell where some DC might be hidden by there being a suspicious space under an image or line

Click HERE to listen to Ruby & Deso's commentary of Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World!

Director's Commentary: this thread works ten times better if you have actually seen the movie it's parodying and if it's your first time watching it (google "attacker tv" but dont forget ur adblock) feel free to play our commentary track alongside it where I special interest dump (just like Scott!) all the behind the scenes trivia I had stored up from studying every second of this movie to the lovely Deso, we have some banger quips since we're both having so much fun, this was recorded May 31st 2016 and my old mic sounds like the filter they put on in movies to depict a bad radio lol


Director's Commentary: this was the first image I made for the thread so it has a lot of 2010 vintage memes (like ytmnsfw still existing lmao) but couldnt bring myself to change it

>implying the Earth isn't flat
Director's Commentary: originally instead of just using the "CENTER" board code tag on the entire thread I would put literally 7 "INDENT" tags in front of every single line to make the text seem arranged like a script before I experimented some more for my Breaking Bad thread (click HERE to read it), so not doing that anymore basically halved the threads wordcount

DRAMATIC VOICE OVER
Over a decade ago...

On the backwater troll forum...

Of FJS...

Ruby Calaber is dating a robot.
Director's Commentary: originally I was toying with having the voice over be ROY4L speaking but since I used him as a character later on it's left as generic dramatic voice over man (in the movie it's actually Bill Hader), the opening line changed each year from like "1 year ago" to "a decade ago" ect (the original line is just "not so long ago") as I failed to post this thread every time until it took me 13 fucking years, very recently I changed the line there to "Of FJS" from "Of YTMNSFW" since the first scene isn't set there

INT. STEVEYOS.BIZ - DAY
Director's Commentary: this is the first URL for FJS, only until a few months ago I depicted the hang-out house here as being an IRC chat, #FJS on efnet, which never actually existed since there's just lots of easy IRC text refernces with people leaving and joining constantly, but I decided that the constantly changing FJS URL gag is way funnier for these scene-intro-tag things and none of this makes any sense anyway so I just kept in the IRC references too, if the director of The Big Sleep can, no, sorry, let me use a better movie as an example, if the director of Equilibrium can leave in plotholes just because it makes the story flow better than so can I

FANFARE
rubycalaber is dating a robot?
Director's Commentary: direct parody of a line from the movie, also I'd just like to give a shoutout to this metal gear solid fan webcomic called The Last Days Of FOXHOUND that started in fucking 2003 where the speech bubbles background is a unique color to those characters that originally gave me the idea to have different characters dialog appear as different colored text to easily identify them that I've been using since my first LOST gifs in like 2007, this webcomic also heavily inspired the idea for the Troll Squad of using the MGS template of a squad of weird animal themed characters with unique talents but having them be a comedic squabbling bunch of freaks

TEKNORAT
I actually facepalmed with my phone when I found out
Director's Commentary: this thread is already anachronistic as fanfare did not talk to teknorat for 9 years straight after they met up and teknorat posted fanfare's personal information on the forum, remember: associate with an aussie, it'll be costly, also this line is in reference to one of the first things Tek said to me when we were chatting when he worked in a cellphone store when I told him I cybered with deso

FAT STEVEY
oooooh like a realdoll? damn! i want one of those!
Director's Commentary: in the second version of the script I tried to update to be set in the present (e.g. 2015 lul) stevey was just Stevey not Fat Stevey (a play on "Young Neil" in the movie) since he'd since loost wait but since it went back to being set in 2010 its back, I think I tried out calling him "big stevey" at some point but it wasnt as funny, this is also a reference to "Fat Neil" from Community who stevey was going to be cast as in an unproduced megathread parody script I had for an episode of that show, pretty clever in-joke to have with just myself if I do say so myself

FANFARE
how old are you ruby? like 15?
Director's Commentary: a LOST number, also the age I was when ytmnsfw first opened, in the movie Kim asks Scott if he's 28 which seemed so old to me when this movie came out lol


Director's Commentary: this image ended up having way more easter eggs than expected but I'll try to list em all, the banana's in the bowl being penis hybrids is in reference to user bananadong, these used to be in the coffee shop scene over some scones but then I noticed there is actually a bowl of bananas in this scene, the jar of paste represents user lospastyapate, the flowers I stalked from user cutie57's twitter, the steak on Tek's plate is OG ytmnder steakman, the carton of wine represents user Atso I actually forget why I think it's from a company with that name, I've done that a... few times for users who had no avatar, I just googled to find a person's face or an object similar to their username which was hard since a lot of peoples usernames are unreadable non-words, on top of the fridge are cases for Counter-Strike: Source, Day of Defeat, F.E.A.R. 3 and Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon Wasteland all of which I played with Tek and StarCraft II which I played 1 game of with Stevey and won so my SC2 win-rate is unironically 100%, there's some DHARMA ranch dressing in reference to LOST, a tin of spam on the cupboards in reference to all the spambots that post on message boards, I'm handling a bottle of Irn Bru that I don't actually like the taste of, tastes like toothpaste or some shit, but it's a big meme in Scotland since we're the only country in the world where our favorite fizzy drink isn't just coke, there's a box of Gorilla Munch where the "rustled jimmy" meme gorilla face comes from, a meme I used to use constantly in my DayZ dayz, the tub labeled week old popcorn is in reference to me eating week old popcorn and then shitting my computer chair live on omegle once, at the bottom of the fridge is the url for a version of the FJS forums that fanfare had scrolling along a wall at some art show once, on stevey's DS is a hentai game called M.U.G.E.N. he used to play all the time, on the top screen is a gif AlstoPace made of fanfare and adair, a random unrelated to the forums, other than all the rapes that it's users have suffered, meme on the table is a condom that says "go further without consent" I got from 4chan I just thought it was funny idk fuck you, Tek is drinking from a "black rifle coffee" mug who sponsor almost every right wing or gun channel on youtube, when googling for their logo for this dumb lazy reference I got them confused with "black POWDER coffee" but that's another company using operator aesthetic to sell the most boring pussyass mind altering substance in the world since right wingers are cringe like that, on the windowsil is a chocolate orange with a tampon on it in reference for my one friend in real life's family sending me a chocolate orange, which I used to eat all the time in my DayZ dayz, for x-mas but in the bag someone had left in a tampon somehow and this became one of the many in-jokes StompleB has run into the ground over the years, the lampshade being kmade out of a milk carton is in reference to the legendary hacker group the Milkshade Clique who's logo apepars on it that users Gush and Hiroshima were apart of, do NOT mess with them lads, in the corner is the Ruger Gunsite Scout .308 rifle (£645) and bullet proof vest (£850) I bought for Teknorat with BDKL (Big Dog Knot Lovers, our clan tag in various online games) like he had in my Futurama collage and on the rifle is the logo for the unironic facebook group "Libertarian Guys With Asian Wives" which he is now irl, on the wall are really low scoring reviews for shit video games I cut out of the official PS2 magazine and stuck them up on my bedroom wall in a holiday flat we used to own so I could read and laugh at them whenever I was there, I took a picture of it like a decade ago when we were selling the place since I knew I'd want to use it for something one day and here it is, just a fun little memory of another autistic project I did as a teenager, the weird container with greenery in it is labeled dank weed in reference to stevey's weed addiction, on my jeans is a symbol I'll explain when it appears later, on the wall are posters for a L4D game me, stevey, barry and cberry played when we all posted on FJS, a pic of the cast of The Room that me, cag and Camoron watched while making jokes about how it's actually about plug drugs and lisa's doomed relationship, and a WWF wrestling poster I made for all the posters who were posting in the Summer of 2010 which fits well with this thread being set in Winter of 2010 click HERE to view it, and on the fridge is *takes a deep breath* pic I posted in like 2008 of stevey and m0nde as LOST actors Jorge Garcia and Naveen Andrews pretending to piss into potted plants at some awards show, a pic I made for fanfare of Haylie, the girl he pretended to be, and me, a pic of Matthew Fox and Evangaline Lily as me and Trollinator, a pic from care bears fanfare made labeled as the FJS crew click HERE to view it, a pic of fanfare and artfag crew members ksouth and redguts reading my threads in bed together, my avatar from the Scottish Independence vote, my avatar of my rap about Rochelle from L4D2 (click HERE to view it), a pic of Miley Cyrus and cberry on a sumo wrestler m0nde made, a pic of stevey deleting fanfare's ytmnds for a performance art piece which is still one of the weirdest things to come out of these forums, a pic of Teknorat and Cag over Star Trek characters when they were planning on doing Star Trek commentaries together before she cucked him for Jon, a pic of the girls internutt and iwascruel pretend to be online shooped together, a pic of steveyos as a fat kid and cberry as a chimp from my Speed Racer thread, my Flash avatar from my ytmnsfw superpowers thread, a pic I made for fanfare of us in the comic Invincible, a pic of artemis as Amy Winehouse (RIP), a pic I made for the London meet-up I pussied out of attending click HERE to view it, a pic of the "ytmnsfw six" I made of the last six posters to still have positive rep after clay gave everyone mod and most people just edited everyone they didn't like's rep to be negative in reference to the "Oceanic Six" storyline on LOST, forum girls as LOST girls, a pic fanfare made for the most frequent posters of 2006 with drunkpuppies, me, dave honduras, adair, camoron and starfish click HERE to view it, some anime pic I think Howard Dean made for a thread where me, him, Vitafin and Pirate Steve were discussing anime, a pic of internutt, veritechryan, some collage of Pastor Travis, m0nde, Alsto Pace, Mr. Apgar and Bliz I think Alsto made after the four of them made a bunch of raids on the ytmnd frontpage together, a pic of fanfare and ramen someone made of hot girls in latex, a picture of m0nde attending aber's wedding to a GNAA troll in real life, and a promo pic for Plug Drugs and I's counter-strike duel and finally some real life fridge artwork by I think actually iwascruel impersonating ROY4L's pretentious artfag work, I really lucked out with having a fridge there to just spam all the forum references I wanted since people really do cover their fridge with photos, a pic I made of cberry motorboating his waifu Sheva Alomar, the Scottish cookie is a pic I sent to Haylie on facebook for her bday and she replied "cute :-)" lol oh and some popcorn on the ground that spells out fanfare <3 that I made for guess who years ago

RUBY
look I'm not gonna get trolled about this guys

FANFARE
aren't you a little old for like an imaginary robot girlfriend?

RUBY
it's just an ironically bad gimmick alright, like... I'm the internet hero who always saves the forums and stuff... so she's sent back in time to protect me cus I'll save the internet in the future or something idk I'm making the story up as I go along

and no not like LOST fuck you


Director's Commentary: I considered taking out the ages from the pop-ups when I was considering updating the year it was set in rather than having it be a period peace since it might confuse retarded readers that I'm really still 20 but I wanted it still there since it's set up for le funny jokes about the robots ages later on so I eventually decided to go with year of birth instead, also quite the feel that originally I was 2 years younger than Scott's age when I first started this thread and now I'm a decade older than him, on the side of the bridge is a postcard I sent to one of Tek's ex-girlfriends which rustled his jimbos and when he asked why I did it I hit him up with "I was curious as to what would happen" which is a like from the Hannibal tv show lol, but she requested not to be named or included in this thread and since I respect women I won't, the sticker is for the satirical "leopards eating people's faces" political party thats slogan is "they wont eat YOUR face"

TEKNORAT
hmm a robot fetish, 5/5 bretty good gimmick

RUBY
ty ty

FAT STEVEY
so do you fuck her or does she have a like usb port instead of her p word?
Director's Commentary: stevey doesn't like to use the word "pussy"

RUBY
well uh we're kind of taking it slow... we usually just browse the forums together and have deep meaningful convos about how her assassination missions went and all the people she's ever terminated and what its like to dream

FAT STEVEY
have you even kissed her? cus even I've kissed bethany before
Director's Commentary: reference to stevey's first kiss


Director's Commentary: here's an autistic tangent, originally all the still images in this thread were 1024 pixels wide since I started this in the ancient times of 2010 when that was considered a large image and I was mad at myself for saving the photoshop files for about the first half of the thread as this size and wanted them enlarged so instead of remaking them with higher res screencaps I just enlaged the ones I already made to 1440 pixels wide (I went with 1440 since from experimenting with my neon demon thread it looked the right size on most browsers) but that was in like 2016 and in 2020 I was like fuck it fam and actually did remake all these early images to be 1920 pixels wide it actually didn't take too long and gave me an opertunity to upgrade all the cutout heads to newer more varied ones I'd cutout since then, it's an interesting analogy for the real movie industry where I took so long to make it industry standards of aspect ratios and shit changed and I tried to cut corners to save money like how they don't film most 3D movies with actual 3D cameras and just convert them later, so fuck you camoron I remember you complaining my breaking bad thread would crash your browser from how big the images are get a new computer poorfag, memes here are the laundry represents the user "laundry", stevey has a shirt that says FJS, his message board, an "einstein" bong he used to brag about owning, written on the washing machine is this autistic white board plan from some meme youtube video of some nutjob explaining how the Las Vegas shooting was an inside job in reference to my own autistic white board I plan out threads on, and on my coffee mug is the rubycalaber DHARMA logo I made for my signature speech bubble on the forums

RUBY
well once I tried to trick her into it by pretending I was drowning so she'd give me mouth to mouth but it turns out she doesnt have lungs so she just stuck her fingers down my throat to try and make me barf up water but it was still pretty hot like being deepthroated kinda maybe one day I will get to make love to her

FANFARE
that is seriosuly the most fucked up thing ive heard in years and it makes me feel super weird, it wont be safe to post until thats pushed to page 50

r u a robosexual or something
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to a post fanfare made in response to me posting pictures of me fucking a cyborg fleshlight lmao: "i havent been here in a while after seeing that thread ruby made.. you know the one. it seriosuly was the most fucked up thing ive seen in years and it made me feel super weird. but now that its been pushed to like page 50 i think its safe to make a post." sorry for that but memers gotta meme


Director's Commentary: you get a better look at all the shitty game reviews on the wall here, the toll house cookies are in reference to m0nde telling the then underage aber that her nipples are as big as toll house cookies and the cheerleading uniform of the girl fanfare pretended to be online is seen in the laundry basket with her favorite players number or whatever #22 that was written on her cheek in one pic on the uniform, fun fact: cheerleading is one of the most dangerous sports because girls fall off those people pyramids and break limbs and necks all the time lol

RUBY
idk I try not to label my sexuality

TEKNORAT
for obvious reasons

so whats her... serial number? production code?

RUBY
she has a name alright... I call her "Trollinator"... get it, she's like a terminator but she trolls?

Fanfare and Teknorat share a skeptical look.

FAT STEVEY
terminally nf

TEKNORAT
so when do we get to see her post?

FANFARE
it better not be in my threads thats all im sayin


Director's Commentary: in the background are some jars of the meme drug jenkem, on the table is a can of Yakubian Energy in reference to a comment a member of the "gangsta left" made against streamer Destiny in reference to the bizzare black nationalist conspiracy theory that white people were made by an evil scientist called Yakub, the mug with meme acronyms on it represents user Omgftwpr0nzor, the cup labeled CARE is in reference to the user of that name but also in reference to me putting a label saying care on a cup IRL to post on IGN in reference to the "my care cup is empty meme", the care cup in this scene is down to it's last quarter, representing my care draining from this thread, an Apollo chocolate bar from LOST, my own blood on some mac and cheese I made for an America's Next Top Model thread that fanfare showed Creepy Chan herself which she called "glorious" and called me a "precious angel" for which makes me the best waifuist in human history, some banana slices and crisps on sandwiches I made for an IGN thread when I got banned for 2 weeks and spent my free time doing dumb shit like that, some random margarine meme (the wok beside it looks like an added in meme from its odd angle but isnt lol) and some pancakes that spell out FJS that desolation made

DING DONG! (That's Trollinator getting online. Duh.)

RUBY
oh there she is

you can tell it's her because she's already making the word "dong" appear, damn she's funny!


Director's Commentary: the first gif of the thread (other than the actual first one) the first of 543 to be exact, the way I make these gifs is I load screencaps into Photoshop Elements 5.0 from literally 2006 using a blank gif file I made from some other animated gif since I've never figured out the settings to save a project as an animated gif without using the automatic settings of an already existing animated gif and then edit in my massive folder of over 5000 cutout avatars ranging from 1 for utter d-list posters to about 500 for Matthew Fox, my avatar, if you think that's autistic I used to manually screencap each frame for my first few years of making LOST gifs before /tv/'s resident lesbian glaufriend I <3 Summer told me there's a program called Pot Player (that I call Pol Pot Player in my head) that can rip every frame it plays and I used to open a seperate image in photoshop for each frame and save them individually and then load them into a gif file before I realized you can just merge layers to do all that in one file and only need to save it once, I tried to keep my tism under control but only gifing things in the movie that require motion to understand like the action scenes or certain effects like this, unfortunately Edgar Wright is a very kinetic director so almost every shot has important motion lol

Ruby /msg's Trollinator privately before she posts on FJS.


Director's Commentary: I re-used an idea I had in my breaking bad thread to crop certain screencaps vertically so they're shorter since it looks better than having a lot of empty space in some frames and also it helps hide details that I should really put the effort into parodying with some reference but would be too much work so I just hide it from the reader lmao, featured here are FJS smilies like Harley Quinn holding up an fjs sign, the Jackie Chan meme, Colored Person meme, crying MJ, 9/11 meme, PS3 no games meme, the dog in the lobster costume, the threadbreaker pic of the highest comms tower in the world and a mecha made out of other smilies all having been smilies on various versions of the FJS forums, the FJS logo is something official steveyos made once, the dude flashing his cock down the alley is user "leadpaint"'s creation of the dude he used as his avatar, the unread emails on the mail box are the LOST numbers and represent me never checking my emails, the hieroglyphics as the house number are "meme magic" hieroglyphics from 4chan, the stevey's birthday pic is a colorcode I made for him for an IRC competition, the "Ruby's" sign on the window is from a pic of a bar sign fanfare sent me once, the dude with the eyepatch in the window is in reference to a fan-made troll squad member drunkpuppies made pretending to be my dad and I guess you can imagine him being in the house next door is in reference to Scott living across the road from his parents house in the movie, to build on that in-joke is Christian Shepard hiding in the bushes like he does on LOST who has also been used to represent my dad in my Spider-Man parody comic, the dog is Bobby Knotts, a dog stevey owned in Second Life that he tricked me into petting so it would then fuck my character, his collar says BDKL which stands for Big Dog Knot Lovers, Teknorat and I's clan in GTAV online, in reference to Teknorat loving bestiality porn, the black guy bird is a smiley called nigure.png that's been on various forums since way back and the dogknot dildo for his penis is a .png file I've used for years it's funny, I've spent so long making every frame of this movie as visually cluttered as possible with meme references when I actually watch the movie every set seems so bare in comparison and even the dialog and plot seem barebones from me changing every line to be some elaborite parody of that line in reference to the forums trying to write another posters personality and probably some double entendre too

TROLLINATOR
Hello.

Is this where the funny jokes are located?

My comedy sensors indicate otherwise.
Director's Commentary: There is an odd thing where I can't get the fonts I use for Trollinator and other robot character's text, "Fixedsys" or alternative "System", to display properly on any PC so I had to settle for Lucida Console font which is vaugely computery looking/sounding

RUBY
you promise not to troll anyone big dick brutal?

TROLLINATOR
I promise not to troll anyone big dick brutal.


Director's Commentary: the joke being that trollinator's character in Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles was created during and sent back from 2027, a tv show that was written in 2007 where that felt like the far flung future but now we're only four years away from then lmao, also I always figured if I ever wrote a time travel story I'd set the dates so far in the future no one would remember the story when we caught up but here I am confirming in rubynet canon what year trollinator was built in, but thankfully with the wonder of diverging timeline theory I can say whatever bullshit I want and dont need to keep it straight just like Heroes and not like LOST which used whatever-happened-happened time travel theory and had no plot holes due to being for 200 IQ geniuses, also I considered having like the posters Rep points displayed on these pop-up intro-card things but actually caring about rep is cringe so I'm saving that for a future joke

RUBY
seriously please dont scare away what few friends I have

TROLLINATOR
I won't. Unless they become a threat to you.

Teknorat hacks into their chat.

RUBY
hey trollinator this is teknorat he's the only funny aussie

TEKNORAT
g'day


Director's Commentary: considered using the joke where Stephen Stills waves his hand over his own intro pop-up but the still with Scott's hand on his back was funnier, in the back here we see one of the first LOST collages I made of posters (click HERE to view it), I decided to fill up Stephen Still's house here with all my collages over the years on the logic that if the FJS crew were hanging out in one house all the time I'd want to decorate the walls with my autistic collages but I'm too lazy to link to all of them , Tek's T levels being listed in his pop-up here are in reference to a funny thing he once said where he commented that me, barry and stevey's voices are all higher pitched than his since we're all low T betas which is true, and of course in reference to the neo-nazi meme 1488 as all aussies are racist

* teknorat sets mode: +b *!*@213-67-96-23-no52.tbcn.telia.com
* trollinat was kicked by teknorat (just a sec)
Director's Commentary: I really did have an IRC chatbot ten years ago m0nde helped me set-up that I tought basic meme phrases and programmed to automatically give me voice when I joined the same channel and shit, it was really dope and people got really confused that this wasn't like me on another account and I really did have a bot assisstant following me about online that would call them a gay fag if they insulted me, and that string risidual hacker data there was her real ISP tag or whatever that even is, sadly I can't even remember the website I used to run her never mind the log-in details but it was a dank gimmick while it lasted

TEKNORAT
is she going to shit up the forum like a spambot or what?

RUBY
she'll just sit in the corner staring at me



TEKNORAT
we should gang bang her, guys share fleshlights all the time its not gay

RUBY
ok then she might trace your IP and do a drive-by on you

TEKNORAT
that's hot too, nothing wrong with being killed by a hot chick, legalize consensual snuffing
Director's Commentary: this dialog is really how teknorat and I would talk to each other for years on end lol

* teknorat sets mode: -b *!*@213-67-96-23-no52.tbcn.telia.com
* trollinat (~eggdrop@213-67-96-23-no52.tbcn.telia.com) has joined #FJS
Director's Commentary: this was trollinator's real log-in hacker gibberish address thing for IRC, please don't DDoS my robot gf ty



TEKNORAT
you're good

Trollinator enters. She immediately scans the occupants for threats to Ruby's safety.


Director's Commentary: this is a smaller size than the other images since I lost the photoshop file for it somehow and it's too complex to remake, this gag uses Trollinator's actual Heads Up Display from Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles and the targeting boxes are from the A.I. in Person of Interest, in both that show and this thread white boxes mean the subject is being monitored and a white box with red corners and crosshairs means the subject might be a threat, the statistics are LOST numbers or a sum of them, the gaydar is from a user who used that image as their avatar called "gaydar" and is a reference to the real world AI gaydar, the gun symbol is from GTAVI and the ammo count is a reference to the edgy neo-nazi code, the index of emotions Trollinator can induce is a reference to the boss characters from MGS3 (The Joy, The Fear, The Sorrow, The Pain, The Fury, The End and I guess the gay smiley can be Big Boss since he's clearly gay with Ocelot), the suicidal emoji is locked since that's big dick brutal trolling she's just been barred from using, the mini-map is some dumb picture I made to troll Jon and his ears when he was posting screencaps of him playing Quake or something, the facial recognition joke for Tek is in reference to various internet personalities and actors I have told him he looks like throughout the years and he always disagrees like EpicLloyd from Epic Rap Battles Of History, John Claude Van Damme, Felicia Day's brother Ryon she makes gaming videos with, Kyle from the podast PKA aka FPSRussia who has quite a similar gun loving edgy personality too and lefty retard TheSerfsTV

RUBY
trollinator thats fanfare

TROLLINATOR
Hello. What is your real name? I need to know so that I can add it to my database in case I have to terminate you.

FANFARE
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh haylie
Director's Commentary: in reference to the girl fanfare knew in highschool and then pretended to be online which caused loads of drama as retards started stalking her facebook, I sent her a scottish cupcake pic for her birthday once and she replied back "thanks <3" so another waifu I've successfully seduced

TROLLINATOR
What's wrong with your hair? Are you injured and bleeding?

FANFARE
im a redhead you fuckin retarded bot


Director's Commentary: when I first made this image a decade ago I didn't even know what the clone tool was so did the FJS sign in the background by just blotting over it with the paint tool lul, the collage is a huge pic I made of posters as various historical figures (click HERE to view it) and the other pic is of me, jon and cag for the DayZ thread where they first met and are now married lol

RUBY
trollinator thats fat stevey, he's kind of our muse

FAT STEVEY
yo, your posting with the mothafuckin God Troll™ now bitch


Director's Commentary: the yugioh cards are some I made of forum users and memes years ago and also I guess this is as good a place as any for this shoutout but the comedic style of this thread of recontextualizing of a piece of media into rapid-fire references and in-jokes was influenced by the DBZ and Yu-Gi-Oh "Abridged" youtube series that I used to love years ago, if I had anything approaching actual professionalism or artistic talent I'd be making something along those lines, stevey's pop-up is in reference to him aaaaalmost getting gout throughout his life

TROLLINATOR
Hello. Are you the leader of this spin-off community?

FAT STEVEY
i used to be but teknorat bought the funnyjokessquad.com domain the month when i had to spend my whole welfare check on weed

so can you slot on a dick attachment onto yourself like a vacuum cleaner nozzle?

im into trapzzzz
Director's Commentary: like almost everything in this thread yes that really did happen

TROLLINATOR
You are interested in traps? Are you planning a trap to harm Ruby?



FAT STEVEY
yeah he wishes i would hook him up with a hot trap like ksouth to dominate him
Director's Commentary: ksouth is a gorgous model that fanfare somehow brought to the FJS forums that stevey then bothered telling her he wished she had a dick

TROLLINATOR
A user called ksouth is planning a trap to exert power over Ruby? Thank you for this actionable intelligence. I will make sure to terminate her before she can harm him.

FAT STEVEY
dont mention it hot stuff

shit now that im not the token fat guy of the story anymore im gonna lose my v-card for sure the bitches love me now

TROLLINATOR
That is because there are no token fat people in this movie. But you do appear to be the token virgin loser nerd.

FAT STEVEY
FUCK MY LIFE


Director's Commentary: clearer shot of the M.U.G.E.N. gameplay on the DS

RUBY
alright lets start our goodones practice with the official fjs theme song "black niggers"

TEKNORAT
just so we're clear I've never even posted on fj-
Director's Commentary: I think this is true, even though Tek was always chatting to every poster and posting on every other forum, he never actually signed up for the FJS forums, even when he owned them for a few months, just to spite stevey lmao

FANFARE
WE ARE THE FUNNY JOKES SQUAD!!! ONE-TWO-THREE-FOUR!!!


Director's Commentary: watching these first gifs since I first made them all the way back in November of 2010 the things I wish I'd done different is not use the same cutout heads for Tek and Fanfare and Stevey so much since this was before I cutout a lot more and the movie frames are a liiiittle bit too light since a decade ago I was taking screencaps from Pot Player that had like the contrast settings turned up slightly or some dogshit typical computers problem but these problems aren't that noticible since it's all in motion and gifs put a grainy slightly off color filter over every animation anyway, went back and added the collage in the background

The FJS crew play one of their greatest hits as Ruby types out the lyrics.

The Mega Thread Association of Scotland recommends opening these song videos in another tab to enhance your multimedia experience by being able to easily synch, stop or replay the music.
Director's Commentary: I don't actually know or care anything about music but the fact that this movie centers around musicians and somehow I had already made seven songs myself made me realize the extremely parody potential of this film but actually choosing which of my songs to put where in the thread and how to depict them with different characters singing different lines and such was one of the last things I did during writing, idk how to embed timestamps which is lame since some of these songs I embed have like 30 seconds of start-up time so just skip that yourself in another tab if ya like


Director's Commentary: the inclusion of this song makes this thread completely unsharable with any other community online but it's simply classic rubycore and the only thing I've ever had deleted off youtube somehow for being too edgy, so I had to use my alt to upload it, I remember stevey telling me they should play this at klan rallys and even cberry found it funny and let me use that pic of him as the cover which is like the ultimate n-word pass, this isn't one of the 10 songs I made in 2010 ago with this very thread in mind, I knew I wanted roughly 10 new songs so set about writing and making them and when it became clear there's no way I'd finish this thread in only a few months I went ahead and just posted those 10 songs on their own, most of them work fine on their own and I've changed the order I figured they'd appear a decade ago

RUBY
you know what? FUCK niggers!

this song's all about hatin niggers!

so give me a reply if you hate niggers too!


Director's Commentary: yes those really are my long ass nails, after it became a meme that I have long nails I purposefully didn't cut them for months just to take pictures for this thread, also I purposefully bought that shirt just for this thread because it reminded me of the "clown shirts" that Chris Chan wears

RUBY
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!

TEKNORAT
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!



FANFARE
Black nigger had a niglet, bam ba lam!

RUBY
Damn thing chimped out, bam ba lam!

TEKNORAT
She's always beat boppin, bam ba lam!

FANFARE
Just to go wig shoppin, bam ba lam!

TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!

RUBY
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!


Director's Commentary: the order of the dialog actually synchs up with who appears in what order in the gif, which I've tried to do for every song I include the lyrics of in this thread, didn't go so far as to add the collages and such added items in heavy motion gifs like this, hope you'll excuse the continuity errors but it'd be too much autism fiddling work to do for every gif since it's something most readers, all three of them, will miss, until the 1 of them reads this, "beat boppin" means giving head for money and Tek said black girls would do this to buy wigs in the store he worked at

RUBY
seriously, FUCK niggers!

come on, who else hates niggers? give me a reply!

TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!

FANFARE
All niggers must hang, bam ba lam!
All niggers can suck my wang, bam ba lam!

RUBY
All niggers are monkey scum, bam ba lam!
Goddamn niggers are dumb, bam ba lam!

TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!


Director's Commentary: new easter egg is a poster for Borderlands, a series Tek and I have sunk over 300 hours each into, click HERE for an epic borderlands screencap, I also considered for years of making this panning out shot here an animated gif but it'd just be too fiddly to keep shrinking the various elements moving around so I just went with a screenshot of each new credit

RUBY
they really do look and act like monkeys!

come on! if you're proud to be white, give me a reply!

FANFARE
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!

RUBY
Niggers should be in chains, bam ba lam!
I love to piss on nigger remains, bam ba lam!

um for legal reasons I won't be performing the next line

TEKNORAT
pussy

Gonna crash a plane into Obama, bam ba lam!
Just like my homeboy Osama, bam ba lam!

RUBY
leave it out you cheeky so and so

FANFARE
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!


Director's Commentary: the speech bubble in the bathroom is in reference to a smiley I presume clay uploaded making fun of jon being a know-it-all as a talking toilet, new memes here are the random picture of the virgin mary on the wall there is shooped to be a pic of iwascruel I think Alsto Pace shooped once and the "redrum" text on the mirror is actually in reference to #wop chatter "rEdRuM", I credit rubynet studios with presenting it since this is the forum it's finally being posted on

TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!

RUBY
I fucking hate you nigger, bam ba lam!
Because your dick is bigger, bam ba lam!

FANFARE
All niggers do is lie, bam ba lam!
Niggers make my granny cry, bam ba lam!

TEKNORAT
WHOAH black niggers, bam ba lam!
WHOAH I hate niggers, bam ba lam!


Director's Commentary: credited ytmnsfw and FJS for producing this thread since these are the forums where almost all the references are from, also this is the only apperance of the drums saying FJS since I needed it to work for a gag in Trollinator's H.U.D. but Kim's drum set only appears in the amp versus amp duel towards the end and that whole sequences is full of animated gifs it'd take waaaay too long to put the FJS logo over the bomb logo so let's just pretend that's a seperate drum set there too

RUBY
come on, whos proud to be white?

white pride world wide! YEAH!

FANFARE
WOAH black niggers, bam ba lam!
WOAH I hate niggers, bam ba lam!

TEKNORAT
I want to join the kkk, bam ba lam!
But they dont like that I'm gay, bam ba lam!

RUBY
You really cannot deny, bam ba lam!
That all niggers must die, bam ba lam!

FANFARE
HOAH! black niggers, bam ba lam!
WHOAH! I hate niggers, bam ba laaaam!


Director's Commentary: even as I write this I'm not sure what the title of the actual thread will actually be, but the language here is I used to self-depricate by calling my threads generic but this is very ungeneric and megathread has always been a term for a long thread but this is... a level above

RUBY
just go back to africa you'll be happier there

I mean really, lets be honest here, FUCK niggers

TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whooooaaaaa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!

FANFARE
They should go back to africa, bam ba lam!
Or just fuck off to antarctica, bam ba lam!

RUBY
I'd kill a nigger without flinching, bam ba lam!
We need to bring back lynching, bam ba lam!

TEKNORAT
Whooooaaaa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whooooaaaa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!

RUBY
although I would fuck that Nicki Minaj bitch


Director's Commentary: title is a parody of the movie's title Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, obviously, also didn't include the long-ass animation for the opening credits since it's just a bunch of the actors names on different animated backdrops that wouldn't really be very engaging if I just put posters usernames over it

TROLLINATOR
So you do not like humans of African descent? Would you like me to designate them as high priority targets during live-fire engagements?

RUBY
no you see it's ironic, it's actually making fun of racism, pretty clever right?

tek and I are ancaps which is against racism or like its you can not associate with people for whatever reason but can't lynch them
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to me and Tek being listeners of ancap podcaster Stefan Molyneux in 2010 who has since gone off the deep end into race realism and gotten his ass banned from youtube, just to clarify for my inevitable hate speech trial I really am not racist and in fact can't stand alt-right retards for killing edgy racial humor like this song, 15 years ago when I posted this song the reaction was shock from people falling for the obviously over the top troll and laughter from people that get the joke but now that the internet is full of unironically racist morons the reaction from people who think this kind of thing is serious is just "oh another alt-right retard, whatever" and the people laughing at it also think it's serious but are now laughing because they're alt-right retards who unironically agree with it lmao so it kills the joke if no one even gets that it's meant to be wacky or gets mad about it since the real thing is everywhere, so I am actually more anti-racist than any SJW who only pretends to give a fuck about racism to virtue signal since they're middle class college kids who have never known anyone effected by racism since I want racism to go back to being an obviously stupid thing that's easy to mock so I can make jokes pretending to be racist as a meme and I want racism to be over to such an extent that I can just openly say nigger as much as I want to be ironically racist and I don't get banned for it because it doesn't matter anymore, there that's my "I have a dream" speech, end racism so n-word passes are universal

TROLLINATOR
My vocal pattern analysis indicates that you are all of caucasian descent. Is it not considered socially unacceptable for you to say the word "nigger"? You did so forty two times in total.

Implicate Associations Test data suggests a severe automatic preference for White people compared to Black people.
Director's Commentary: yes 42 is a LOST number but that really is the n-word count in that song, Trollinator being capable of running implicate association tests comes up again later, which are a real lab test for racism the absolute meme field of sociology unironically takes seriously where you basically play a mini-game where you click a button when shown black peoples faces and if you hesitate too long it means you're racist or some dumb shit, no wonder only 25% of psychology studies can be replicated lol

FAT STEVEY
that's what you think

i'm an honerary black brotha my n-word pass is like a lifetime membership card to gamestop with loyalty points maxed out

i grew up playing magic the gathering with crips in a stash house im blacker than cberry so SUCK IIIIIIIT
Director's Commentary: something stevey used to tell cberry all the time, considering cberry is now in the U.S. military I think it's fair to say he's an honerary white too

TEKNORAT
I've dated a black girl before so I definately get the n-word pass, or at least I did in my head when I was fucking her

she was a cringy weeb though so not sure if that means she has to give up her black card, black guys can love DBZ but don't know about negresses
Director's Commentary: tek's black ex comes up later as she was friends with reno, Tek would say the n-word in his head when he fucked her, I actually forget her username but she was some ytmnd vent chat groupie

FANFARE
yeah it's... just ironic... fer sher

*tee hee*
Director's Commentary: the joke here is fanfare seems intersted in the work of David Duke... but I think it's just ironic due to him also being from Louisiana


Director's Commentary: memes here are two posters Elezzzark made of house sigils like from Game of Thrones (a show he likes so much he actually read my review megathread of the series, click HERE to read it urself!) I like the pink one way more than the bland red one but I'd already included the red one in some gifs as it replaces a real poster there so I spruced it up with a pic Elz made about if Stevey was a JoJo anime character, search "stand name" in this thread for further info, the framed pic is also in every shot of that wall and is a collage of the FJS crew from Tropic Thunder click HERE to view it, a Naruto collage I made just for fun click HERE to view it, a collage from all the way back in 05 featuring posters I don't even remember but also me as I was a big name poster even after only posting for a few weeks, forget who made this it's so old click HERE to view it, a pic of Gush and her troll victims over the Charmed girls I think m0nde made click HERE to view it, on the drum kit is a mudkip pokemon card I signed and sent in a letter to Vitafin to read out at the London meet-up (click HERE to view it) and that card has been in fanfare's wallet ever since, one of Mad Moxxi from Borderland's signature guns that Tek and I put way too much time into trying to collect by doing the DLC where you fight in her thunderdome for hours and hours on end, on the table is a Qanon magazine cover, a parody of People magazine's cover of Neil Patrick Harris coming out I made for CheYeah, a parody cover of a Matthew Fox interview I parodied for an avatar of me moving on from LOST as well as him, the cover for the awful Punisher vs. Eminem cross-over comic I discussed with Tek once, and the cover for the manga Ana Satsujin about a NEET who falls in love with a female serial killer, the only romance fiction I'll ever read, first clear apperance of the dogknot shield symbol to set-up the joke later

INT. THEFUNNYJOKESSQUAD.COM - NIGHT

FJS is on it's second URL due to it's webhosting money being spent on weed instead.

TEKNORAT
oh yeah she's "funny" alright

RUBY
yeah! ...in the good way?

FAT STEVEY
no shes just retarded, she looks like she has down syndrome in fact

RUBY
oh

TEKNORAT
owned

FANFARE
ruby if your posting career was a nigger I would lynch it
Director's Commentary: sorry fanfare that all your lines are parodies of this mean bitchy character since you are always nice to me

RUBY
yeah, wait what?


Director's Commentary: easter eggs here are my alienware computer aka gimmick character group Robot Patrol member Bluescreening Kristana I named after the actress that plays the T-X in Terminator 3, stevey is fapping to a screencap from a real time me, him, elezzzark and akiraaaaaaa chatted to OG trans e-girl Line Trap on stickam in like 2007, I of course was making her laugh the most as akira, a frenchman, had to translate what she said to elezzzark, a deaf mexican, to amusing results, a game case for Battlefield 2 the first online FPS I played, some stupid meme version of monopoly on the ground, under the bed is my Noob Note, a parody of the Death Note I used to post the pages of, where you write the username of someone you want to get owned on the internet and it'll magically happen, a fleshlight in reference to my infamous fleshlight fucking thread, the scraps of paper in the corner are a diary I kept while banned for 2 weeks from IGN back in 05, some autistic schematics Jon showed me he drew for, I forget what, some pointless autism sim game like Terraria I think? and the amazingly in-depth mission planning notes Teknorat took for an evil scheme we were conconcting in DayZ where we would request medical help from a subreddit of medic roleplayers to lead them into an ambush and steal their gear, this never came to fruition but we learned a lot about how real world military missions are written up, we never actually bothered to do it of course but I did christen it Operation Obamacare, since they'll never get to deliver the medical care they want, which I'm still very proud of, and a clue from the LOST Alternate Reality Game representing #wop IRC no-namer "Arg", the stick behind the bed is a real replica of Mr. Eko from LOST's "jesus stick" I made by carving the same bible verses into a stick I found and my parents thought I had gone insane that I keep in my room to fight off lizards that come to kill me for banning them, on the wall replacing a mask on the wall in the movie is a female anonymous mask representing ALOL user anonymousette, the corkboard is stalked from the facebook of the girl fanfare used to pretend to be, under it is a collage of forum girls made from a pic from a season of America's Next Top Model creepy-chan was on click HERE to view it, on the main wall are posters for movies I recorded commentaries for like The Room with Camoron and Cag, Scottish movies for the 2014 independence referendum Sweet Sixteen, Trainspotting & Braveheart I recorded with Teknorat, Australian movies for ANZAC day I don't think anyone replied to the thread for lmao: Mad Max 3, Muriel's Wedding & The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, our notorious Shindler's List commentary, the Star Wars Holiday Special commentary (click HERE to listen to our commentaries) and an unreleased commentary we made for the Summer Glau movie Mammoth, I chose these posters since they were all shout-outs to commentaries I made for movies made before 2010 to keep the room period accurate, on the wall behind me are posters for movies I've written megathread reviews for: Iron Man, Zombieland, Die Hard 4.0, Transformers, Speed Racer and three posters I have on my real life bedroom's wall for Killer7, Ghost in the Shell and 300 which I also made some gifs from, the device on top of the computer represents #?! IRC chatter "weblo974" and let's pretend the bed represents #?! chatter "bed" lol, out the window the cat is user "pepeloni", ontop of the computer is a box labeled with the filename for a Borderlands trainer me and Tek used to make our own overpowered guns piece by piece and the white box with nobs on it is labeled after a device I bought for like £100 to record GTAV footage on my PS3 but since the game came out for PC I never learned how to use it, on the guitar are stickers for the AnCap Polandball which I've made THIS meme of, the spambot user Otorten's avatar, the logo for Comedy Central ROY4L edited with his ytmnd background pattern meme, a picture of two frogs on a bike captioned "fuck the police" that's a rubynet smiley and a logo that was used by the spambot Sotaro for it's avatar (if you're wondering why the stickers don't appear on teks guitar in other scenes well gotcha bitch this is a different guitar actually), on the bongos is the logo for Donkey Kong Jungle Beat that used a bongo peripheral Sonybros used to make fun of Nintendrones for back on IGN, Gaza City LEGO meme that will always be time period appropriate

FANFARE
i mean do you really want to be with a ROBOT or is this just some creepy gimmick?

RUBY
like do I jerk off to her? well... I do have this one picture of her when she first arrived in our timeline and she was naked because you cant take your clothes through the time disp-

FANFARE
ugh that makes you a species traitor

RUBY
what?! she looks completely human you wouldnt even be able to tell

FANFARE
thats why shes creepy it would be less creepy if she was like r2d2 or something

you're in the uncanny grand canyon

TEKNORAT
unfunny grand canyon more like

but do you ever wank while she exposes her circuitry or other such robosexual shenanigans?


Director's Commentary: easter eggs here are the box for The Matrix Online which Teknorat uploaded a video of himself burning in his backyard after it went so downhill and a poster for The Matrix, both of ours favorite movie

RUBY
uh stevey you were saying she was really hot?

FAT STEVEY
no actually I was saying she is retarded and not funny and a bad poster and a bad gimmick and you should stop using her but yeah I would suck her dick if she had one

RUBY
yeah, see, stevey likes her!


Director's Commentary: easter eggs here are the word traps on the heart on Stevey's shirt, a poster for Breaking Bad which I made my first megathread parody of, a parody of the poster for The 40 Year-Old Virgin I made 10 years ago when I turned 20 and is still valid now so I made what age it is obscured as I'm sure it will still be valid in another 10 years time when I have to explain this megathread in a court for hate speech, a poster for Resident Evil 5 me and Tek played through on co-op while screaming racial slurs the entire time, the case for Just Cause 2 which me, Tek, Stevey and Jon played the fan-made multiplayer mode for which let up to 2000 players fuck about together in the open world map which was incredible fun and it blows my mind that no made-for-profit online game can handle getting that amount of players interacting in one game-instance in [the current year], an autistic map I made for playing GTA4 online's best mode Cops 'n' Crooks to help me and Tek cheat finding where all the escape vehicles spawned and on the computer now is a screenshot of me letting off a "troll bomb" in Second Life that stevey gave me which would release so many meme images around your character it would megalag anyone in the area, on the comp used to be a giant statue of m0nde leaking lava turds in a latrine StompleB made in minecraft but I saved that for the StompleB music video, years ago I had a screencap of FJS on there but it was just visually boring and I replaced it with a screencap I took of watching a police siege on a car that ended with a robot popping in a canister of tear gas I watched with Vitafin but you couldn't really tell what was going on it I had to skew it so much, also a yellow sticky note I made to parody the logo of a brand of flowers I bought for fanfare one valentines day is on the side of the computer, there's also a trigger warning and autism sticker that are both smilies, on the computer is the smiley "high onctane internet"

EXT. NOTYTMNSFW.COM - NIGHT

Ruby browses to his gay forummate's spin-off forum that's even deader than FJS.

He hears the national anthem of Austraia coming from inside.


Director's Commentary: reminder Rolf Harris is a convicted ChoMo

RUBY
hi brian...

bye brian...


Director's Commentary: "The Gay Tank" was a sub-forum for especially annoying users put on "faggot patrol", a usergroup with limited permissions, back on the old ytmnsfw forums, only recently did I decide to put the "notytmnsfw" logo over the door to have this place also be a reference to Barry's spin-off forum which is a big anachronism as he only opened it once he got mad at the rep system on rubynet and you can in fact see the rubynet logo on the ytmnsfw logo under his forums logo but I just wanted to shout-out every stupid spin-off of a spin-off of a spin-off forum I could, memes here are the number on the door has been edited to be 23 the LOST number which was obnoxious to edit into every single instance of it and of course brian peppers lurking in the bush, another very late addition but I noticed Matthew Fox kinda looks like he's looking at someone hiding in the bush so there he is

INT. THE GAY TANK SUB-FORUM - NIGHT

RUBY
before you get le ebin rused about this by everyone else yes I'm dating a robot

BARRY
does his vibrating dick massage your prostate when he buttfucks you?

RUBY
already been over this with stevey SHE doesnt have a dick

BARRY
does this mean we have to stop cybering together?


Director's Commentary: casting Barry as the gay roommate was an EZ choice since I'm pretty sure he really is bisexual and has like told me elaborite stories about dating a guy but then saying it was just a meme so it became a big meme on the forums that he's super gay, meme's here are a "steveyos returns" poster Camoron made commenting on how stevey claims to leave the forum forever every few months only to return, a poster of his avatar in Interstellar he made, my first Home Alone inspired avatar for when I first stayed home alone IRL, a poster piemanmoo made parodying the A-Team, a poster for a gay porn parody of X-men I thought was funny, a dildo I coulda ordered with my cyborg fleshlight, the nob on the wall is for a "foam party" in reference to the gay party event Marco Rubio was accused of attending, Barry is reading this semi-autobiographical manifesto he posted on the forum once and marks has been reposting forever, I also lucked out with the 23&ME meme numbers here that 69 and three LOST numbers really do add up to 100, the joke there being that Barry has flirted with the alt-right in recent years but has your typical mystery meat Australian mutt ancestry and would get put in a gas chamber by Hitler

RUBY
fuck off barry we do not cyber you sent me a pic of your bent dick cumming on some anime catgirls one time and I just so happened to be jerking off already when I saw it
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to a cum sign Barry sent Gush once, which I did not jack off to or anything I'm not gay ok that bit is made up


Director's Commentary: killgreys (who's avatar is of a girl who lost her camera with her nudes on it and someone found them and posted them and thousands of people have used them to catfish with and she is constantly having angry love scam victims harassing her lel) and Lina Goldberg (Max's sister) are the iconic t.A.T.u. poster since they were only two females left to be cast, let me just say I always thought it was weird their entire gimmick was pretending to be lesbians when they obviously weren't but I guess that's weird Russian culture where they are extremely homophobic but love lad culture of lusting over hot lesbos for you, the term "lemons" is australian slang for lesbos and one of the few memes I've copied from barry, this parody of the ownership diagram here is in reference to how when barry first came to the forums he'd copy other peoples gimmicks wholesale in fact I kept track of the gimmicks he copied on my freewebs (click HERE to view it), Heidi the Chicken is a real chicken (and also a fanmade Troll Squad character marks98 made, also appears in Keithinator's signature) Barry used to own and named it after Gush, a girl who trolled him,'s fake name and everyone would joke that the fucks the chicken, think she ended up being sold to his neighbours for dinner lol rip, stevey used to live in his mums wooden panneled basement which became a meme since that's a sign of white trashness I guess, the "phenomenon" and text-over-face "the word" posters were made by m0nde and the middle poster was made by Camoron, the panties and bra I think are from a ytmnd image Deso made once and referencing me cross-dressing on Deso's command I'm not gay or trans or anything of course h-heh and Barry dressing up in pink hot pants for Gush, (the brackets posting style (is when you keep adding things (in sub (sub (sub brackets (for effect))))) and actually pre-dates the (((antisemitic echos))) meme, the Model Hard poster is something I made for Creepy-Chan's apperance on ANTM All-Stars that I've seen passed around on 4chan a lot, the paper on the bed is a fake script leak I made for Suicide Squad 2 with Baneposting memes I've seen passed around 4chan as if it were real (click HERE to view it), DVD logo is for "Sweet Vicious" a surprisingly violent and ark short lived MTV show about women who take vigilante action against their college campus rape culture that I also included in a frame of my gender swap speech bubble signature

BARRY
oh yeah your pretty much my butt bitch forever


Director's Commentary: to save space I'll address the DVD cases on the shelf in a later image they appear more clearly in, Die Hard poster was made by me for one of my LOST review threads, now those were some megathreads! *sips monster energy*, the Jacob poster idk the context of but I think Camoron made it and I actually only just noticed there's a picture of Taylor Lautner on the PC under it lets pretend I did that on purpose, the stolen 4chan memes on the computer are in reference to my Troll Squad gimmick Implying Imperial Eagle that just rips off the 4chan >green text implying meme, the James Bond poster I made to promote the Barry centric trailer for my DayZ threads that I'm still very proud of (click HERE to view it), there's a bunch of bullseyes on the walls that Barry showed me when he went to a shooting range once, nice groupings solider, I actually lost the original screencap of Barry's The Word thread so I'm just left with that blurry one from when I started this thread but thankfully it's meant to be blurry and in the foreground, and I completely forget what band is on the old ass YouTube screencap on the TV but it's some numetal band Barry showed me since we both have a 12 year old's taste in music

RUBY
so the whole robot girlfriend gimmick dont tell too many people about that

BARRY
dw bro your secret is safe with me

RUBY
I mean dont tweet it to my sister

Barry scrambles to his twitter page and starts tweeting away.

RUBY
you better just be hitting on garfield again!


Director's Commentary: I was origially thinking of using real pictures of my sister for this thread to get mega replies but then reverse image searches became a thing so now my sister is represented by Emilie de Ravin who plays Jack's sister on LOST like how my dad was represented by John Terry who plays their dad in my spider-man comic parody

Ruby immediately gets an in-coming Skype call.

This song can be heard playing in the background.


Director's Commentary: even though this song is clearly making fun of Scottish "ned" culture it become extremely popular with neds themselves to the extent that you could hear them singing it in public

RUBY'S SISTER
ach yer nobbin ahena bolts affa mo'or? jings ye wee bizzum ye yer mingin rank wits rang wiye?
Translation: Oy, you're having sex with a woman who runs off of a motor? Jesus you little brat you, you're disgustingly gross, what's wrong with you?

RUBY
thats not true... who told you?

RUBY'S SISTER
yer wee beezered bufty dunro
Translation: Your little drunk gay Barry.
Director's Commentary: I actually got the idea for adding directors commentary in tiny invisible text from first adding the translation notes for my sister's heavy use of scottish slang this way, I actually didn't know half these words and had to look them up online lmao but the heavy accent that turns even normal words into near gibberish is inspired by the working class kids I went to school with since my family actually all speaks like middle class people aka an understandable english speaker and not a chimp huffing helium


Director's Commentary: here you get the first clear look at me adding cutout pix of my real nails when they were at their longest to Scott's fingers, I am doing this literally 2 days before posting this thread and it'll be a ballache but I asked myself the question "is it funny?" and the answer is yes, yes it is, I won't be doing it in gifs but I also lucked out that in the still images I've made you only see Scott's fingernails like 10% of the time, when he's not in close-up he, very considerately considering he's in literally every scene of the movie, has his hands balled in fists or is holding or fiddling with something to where his fingers are pointed inwards thank christ (ok it only took me 12 hours not bad), fun fact: Anna Kendrick, who plays the sister, and Edgar Wright, the director, were dating during this movie's production, not sure that's even legal now adays, also note the gamer girl pee in the background, very anachronistic meme but since the coffee shop is being parodied as a camgirl site it fits for some le funny object to shoop in there

RUBY
goddamn it I should have never sent him my favorite pic of yours to fap to just before reverse image searches became a thing

BARRY
already spunked a hard one to all of her facebook bikini pix bro

RUBY
NO YOU HAVENT YOURE GAY YOU FUCKING FAGGOT FUCK OFF


Director's Commentary: special thanks to barry for taking a series of pictures of himself pulling goofy expressions in 2010, they have been a god send for including him in autistic projects, love you mate, on the phone is a pic from Emilie de Ravin's insta of her sticking her tongue out like a SLUT, a Putin dildo covered in shrapnel and filled with explosives that Ukranians have been dropping on Russians from drones lol, a real brand of soap called "nigger joes" on the shelf, a poster that Sam Hyde had made and presented to iDubbz during their infamous interview and on the mirror is the insane writing of Johnny Depp that got shown during that meme tastic trial (>tfw you'll never be in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship with Amber Heard)

RUBY'S SISTER
whooz thahme'ul bird yer pokin?
Translation: Who's that metal girl you're screwing?

RUBY
well she's modeled after Summer Glau

RUBY'S SISTER
yer takin thae pish, ain thah downers graft aohooeerrthaeplace midden? whiwan'i'affa?
Translation: You're taking the piss, isn't that down syndrome sufferer's career an all over the place mess? What one is it off of? - a taxi driver once said "whiwan'i'affa" to me and I had to get him to repeat himself three times before I realized he was asking which road to take

RUBY
she's kind of a terminator

RUBY'S SISTER
yer bums oot ah windae! ah bastarin bajin gon boo skelpin fowks roon thae coupin givin et laldy?
Translation: You're lying! A bastard bad one going about beating people around the head giving it large?

RUBY
th-they're not bad, they're just following their orders, like concentration camp gaurds

RUBY'S SISTER
uv yiz houghmagandy thon wehthae wee herry?
Translation: Have you had sexual intercourse then with the little slut?


Director's Commentary: idk if Livejasmin is even still online but it was the biggest camgirl site ten years ago, if this was a modern set thing I guess it'd be only fans, and no my sister does not have an only fans she is a classy bird, the memes on the menu like "melina & arianina camshow" are referncing the streamer Destiny's gf stripping on cam with one of his many lovers, an obvious cag-style sociopath who gets off on seducing married e-celebs which she did to some youtuber called Shay Carl, she actually got mad that Destiny and Melina have an open relationship and she has no problem with him fucking other girls and Nina pissy with them and for NOT starting loads of drama with her since she's needs her narc emotional vampire energy supply and fucked about not paying her her half of her camshow earnings, unfortunately for Nina, Destiny AKA Sociopath Steve hoards information on people he meets online even better than me and just threatened to expose her various evil thot schemes if she didn't pay up, the being yelled at to donate meme is in reference to two other girls Destiny pumped and dumped and also gott butthurt at him about it BadBunny and InvaderVie who both went viral in the incelosphere for berating their simps for not donating, sidenote about BadBunny: as I was rewatching this movie for a final time to make sure I didn't miss any memes I found a screen recording I made of streamer Destiny's chat watching it (he posted LUL emotes at the "can you even date outside your race" joke, yikes sweetie) and I was joking with streamer BadBunny about Aubrey Plaza's being bitchy like her and she was posting edgy jokes about how you know Ramona's a slut that's great in bed and she herself has since fucked Destiny, had a falling out, got cancelled for being unironically racist and homophobic in her discord and pivoted so hard to the left that she's now dressing up as a Hamas fighter and justifying October 7th lmao, the string of coomer acronyms is inspired by Sam Hyde, another obvious sociopath that Cag of course is a fan of, used as a good gag in his terminally online inspired comedy book I saw some scans of since I'm not buying a book called "How To Blow Up The U.S. Gov't", pocket healslutting is in reference to people actually paying gamer girls to play Overwatch with them as Mercy which is it's own sexual fetish somehow, the n-word thing is that there are, or were, videos on pornhub that are just montages of white girls saying the n-word and thue comments are full of black guys saying shit like "forgive me martin luther king, but I cum to this shit at least once a week" if I was black I'd probably do the same thing and I hope white people get enslaved so I can enjoy raceplay femdom properly, the candle labeled "this smells of my vagina" is from Gwyneth Paltrow and recently exploded in a British woman's home, Amouranth's jarred farts product "cutie pa-toot-ies" feature, the drink "Booty Sweat" from the essential couldntbemadetodaycore movie Tropic Thunder appears

RUBY
nope no no we haven't even cybered yet... I think she talked about my testicles in a medical context once...

RUBY'S SISTER
rrroobie ya wee bampot, fookin sta'eaeyer blether ya tube
Translation: Ruby you little moron, the fucking state of your jokes you idiot.

RUBY
its just nice and simple with no complicated human emotions and stuff

RUBY'S SISTER
ets gonon yonks ince yegoh scunnered baytha howlin aljin
Translation: It's been years since you got let down by that old bitch.

RUBY
still don't have my myspace back
Director's Commentary: reference to the meme I did of making my myspace look like Juliet hacked it (most old myspace profiles seem broken but while searching for my old one I found Tek I assume had made a parody profile of me with 1 audio file of me screaming presumably in CS:S or TF2 before we became friends lol)

RUBY'S SISTER
soz av yeh staped bein malki o'ar yeh jest gonie winge on boot eh fae thae restayeh hudgie?
Translation: So have you stopped being depressed or are you just going to complain about it for the rest of your life?

RUBY
can I get back to you on that?


Director's Commentary: in the second version of this script I wrote in 2014 the major change was recasting Juliet as Lisa and the joke about her molesting me was swapped out for a joke about her hearing me say I shit my computer chair, but it wasn't really funny (unlike how funny child molestation is of course) and I wasn't liking trying to set it in present day since it's such light and wacky source material which fits peak ytmnsfw and not the dark miserable reality that is rubynet which is more fitting for another darker thread idea I have to be mainly about Lisa anyway, on writing this third iteration where I had it set as a period piece again I found myself running into the problem a lot of modern hollywood movies have where you can tell different ideas in the script have come from different versions with conflicting themes and set-ups and payoffs lel, but keep in mind I do this for free and do not get paid millions to make the new Star Wars films, also note the pedophile symbols from some FBI leaflet that got loads of attention and probably blown out of proportion because of pizzagate and probably used by pedophiles like 100 times more now that they've heard of the overreaching conspiracy theories about how anything with a butterfly on it means pedophilia

EXT. ALIENWARE HEADQUARTERS - DAY

Ruby and Barry wait for Trollinator to finish downloading her latest Windows updates with the rest of the forum bots.

BARRY
robot patrol fucking sucks so bad

RUBY
this gimmick team has boys too

BARRY
fucking phobe

even I wouldnt fuck a robot

RUBY
but a chickens is fine too right barry

BARRY
fuck off

RUBY
what about a robotchicken?

BARRY
that show sucks almost as much as you suck your own di-


Director's Commentary: the Robot Patrol were a villainous analog to the Troll Squad (talking animals I originally said were hired to post for me as I made my MGS4 review thread I only ever got half-made in the end) of gimmick characters sent back in time to troll me, the joke is they all get their updates from Alienware as that brand is notorious in general for being unrealiable and especially on the forums for causing me constant bluescreen mid-gaming session, Robot Patrol featured here are Novice NS-5 from iRobot, Big Dick Brtual Bonecrusher from Transformers 1 and a nod to my review thread of that movie I made mostly for siburke939 who's a big Transfomers fan, Backpedalling Big Dog from Boston Dynamics, Tourettes T-1 who used to just spout Tourettes Guy ticks and ticks from this Tourettes documentary me and ROY4L watched where this girl goes through an airport screaming "bomb" and "nigger" but should really be updated with Sweet Anita ticks, Apathy Android from Terminator 4, Toyota Trumpetbot who takes the piss out of trumpet user boobz and he has a trumpet that represents meme alt "boobz's trumpet", Rep Roomba who just neg reps people and Viral Vick from the same TV show as Trollinator, also featured are references to the user "Synth", prolific forum spambots abestgogpk (the T-800) and abtogstets (the Iron Monger), a Robot Patrol fan character Tek made called Jew-Bot Teknorat that's in reference to a weird pic someone on his Matrix message board made about him and the toy robot avatar spambots were given at some time on the forums, also included are Robot Patrol members that never actually got posted called "Lisa's Protector Penguins", the joke being Lisa lives on a place literally called Penguin island, and they'd protect her from trolling like Trollinator does for me and Keithinator does for barry, I actually made their sig in fucking ‎2014 but never got around to posting them since as soon as I took ownership of the forums I stopped liking posting there daily since it became work instead of play immediately lol, they were a 7-in-1 gimmick and would be named after the Penguins of Madagascar and Roy and Silo those gay zoo penguins libtards love, click HERE for their posting sig

I guess this place is as good as any to dump the ideas I've had in a txt file for like 15 years for more Robot Patrol members that never got made: Cyborg Doakes (from the Dexter fan meme/semi actual book thing) would go around accusing people of being serial killers, ASBO ASIMO would be a sterotypical ned/chav, Socialist #Six and Cybersex Cylon (from Battlestar Galactica) are self explanatory, Backtrace Agent Pace (The Matrix Online) would cyberstalk people, I was big into the Terminator franchise 15 years ago so I had Hard-On Harvester (Terminator Salvation) who'd post about anything that'd give him a hard-on, Hype Hydrobot (Terminator Salvation) who'd be like a rappers hype man or something, Spelling and Grammar Correction Cromartie (T:SCC) and Queer Queeg (T:SCC) are self explanatory, Haiku Gekko (MGS4) would post in haikus, Binary Bit (Tron) would post in binary, Projecting R2-D2 & C3PO would point out when someone's projecting, Query Quorra (Tron: Legacy) would always be asking niave questions, Robot Chicken (in reference to the tv show) would troll barry about fucking chickens, you can guess Dat Ass Data, Athiest ARIIA (Eagle Eye), HAL over 9000, Artfag Arcee (Transformers), Pro-Ana Cortana (Halo), Trap Clap-Trap (Borderlands) and Scat Robo-Cat (would just be a photoshoped robot cat), Alpha Alpha (Power Rangers) would have been a sterotypical redpill advice guy, that's actually a goodone lol, Screamer Screamer (Screamers) would post screamers, the Buffybot (Buffy The Vampire Slayer) was going to have the gimmick of either Dogknots, Beastiality, Bumping threads or maybe Bum Fun aka anal sex, 9/11 7 of 9 (Star Trek) would post conspiracy theories, 2 Deep 4 U Deep Blue, Last Edited EDI (Mass Effect) would point out when people last edited their posts, Piracy EDI (the based movie Stealth) would post piracy links since in that movie he literally downloads all songs on the internet in a scene, he'd possibly be helped by Torrent Turret (Portal) would post links to torrents, I was really scraping the bottom of the idea barrel with Acronym Android 18 (DBZ) who'd... post in... acronyms? idk, China Farmer v4 from ALOL could have lived on if I had copypasted more of his generic responses, also originally HK-47 from Star Wars: KOTOR was going to have the "Human Hating" gimmick, I was also considering just making Laughing Octopus from MGS4 a gimmick character since she's hot af and she'd just laugh at peoples misfortunes

Trollinator detects Barry about to diss her principal (as in the primary person she's protecting, not the head teacher of the school) and intervenes.

TROLLINATOR
Are you attempting to troll Ruby?

RUBY
hey trollinator this is my gay aspie forum mate barrypothead

BARRY
g'day, do you only speak binary or some shit?

TROLLINATOR
Hello. I am fluent in over six million forms of commu-
Director's Commentary: this line is in reference to the C3-PO line in Return of the Jedi where he really does give that number

BARRY
haha 6 million nice funny meme number


Director's Commentary: on the fence is QR Code Quail, a fanmade Troll Squad member marks98 made but hinted at being an infiltrator for Robot Patrol, my gimmick universe has very deep lore, the blue bird is spambot "lullumankane" who set his own avi

BARRY
but seriously though... want me to redpill you on the holohoax?

TROLLINATOR
You want to discuss the mass extermination of humans? Are you attempting to flirt with me?

RUBY
he's gay

TROLLINATOR
In the future I knew of an infiltrator model who utilized a homosexual trolling gimmick to seduce and terminate key resistence leaders.

BARRY
was he big and buff with loads of muscles? reminds me of a guy I fuck
Director's Commentary: the implication here is Barry doesn't know a certain character coming up later is a robot since he's dumb

RUBY
haha ok barry you can leave now... seriously get out

Barry grabs Trollinator's wrists and warns her:

BARRY
pretty much hes gonna fuck you up the arsehole rawdog every time you reboot im not even kidding


Director's Commentary: Robot Patrol members TL;DR Drone and Motorbike Moderator make an apperance in the background, "rawdog" is a beloved meme of Barry's

RUBY
heh heh thats uh thats just him trolling I'm not a degen who wants to fuck robots or anything

just another wacky running joke we have going on ol tim and I best of buds with all our in-jokes! h-heh

BACKPEDALLING BIGDOG
thats the spirit kid, you can back pedal out of anything if you're self-delusional enough!

SPAMBOT SENTINEL
¢lÌ©|« |-|£®€ ƒ¤® |-|Ò™ ƒÈ™|3ò™ ¶Ó®n §|3 G `/óƒq |oo à6èn™ ¶ÂÇÉ ãì¿À àlÍçé álí™Á Â|\|Ιâ 㶶lÊ Ã®œê ã®îÏÄ ä\/À |3|\||3 ú|\|ï™ |3Úƒƒ¥bÔ™ ÇÀ|| ça™Ë®ô|\| ¢a™|-|뮡|\|É \/\/Èà\/ë® ©Õ®™Ã|\|ä |)à|-|_) ¿õ|Ö®é§ ê¿Ì 6|¿ö§ |-|®¶`4C ì®Ô|\|â |«ÄÍ|-|Ó™|3ò™ |«™í4 ™Î|\|§™®Âl ¶È®§Ë¶|-|Õ|\|ë ¶ùÖ®®Ä $|-|ö¿Ä|\| $|<¥|\|é+ +-£Oo0 +|-|È |\/|ä©|-|ì|\|é ™¬+ ü|™®Ó|\| 6 \/Ï|«ï
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to how spambots used to spam walls of weird special character text while attemping to link to viagra, it can be read as "click here for hot fembot porn 2B 6 7pf9 18 Agent Pace Aida Alice Alita Anita Apple Arcee ARIIA Ava BnB Unit Buffybot Call Cameron Cahterine Weaver Cortana Dahj Dolores EDI GLaDOS HRP-4C Irona Kia HotBot KM-14 Minstral Persephone Quorra SHODAN SkyNet T-3000 The Machine T-X Ultron 8 VIKI" which is a list of the subfolders in my "Robots, Cyborgs & AIs" waifu folder since I have an unironic robot fetish


Director's Commentary: pro-tip: you can tell when an image of trollinator has been flipped because her mole is meant to be above her left eyebrow, also characters like Spambot Sentinel and Viral Vick used to link to actual browser hijacking sites but they're all offline now adays so I just used a good ol' gnome'd meme instead

INT. FJS'S FORUM ARCADE - DAY
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to the 2nd version of FJS having a forum arcade full of flash games m0nde made where you have to like escape a maze of wooden pannels as steven yelle to leave his mums basement and such

Ruby and Trollinator are playing the co-op mode of one of those annoying "kill 10 ninjas before the time runs out to win a free iphone" flash ads.
Director's Commentary: only just realized years later that showing them play this game is the movie's way of introducing the idea of arcade video game iconography and action to normies who might not get the video game themes, bravo Wright!

RUBY
you know it's not even the shows fault that casuals think the island was purgatory, it's because some fucking retarded YIDS at ABC thought the final episode would be too emotionally intense for viewers so they inserted old footage they had of the plane wreckage on the beach over the closing credits to let the audience like decompress and calm down before they transitioned to the local news or whatever
Director's Commentary: in the first two drafts of this thread this monolog was some unfunny theory I had about them re-using plot elements from LOST in Fringe but it was so obscure it didn't really work so I replaced it with this real anecdote I go around telling people of something that actually happened, I remember Tek snorting when I sneered the word "YIDS" when telling him this story during a game of H1Z1, another idea I had for a LOST related anecdote here was how they were going to have a volcano in the final episode but ran out of budget but I couldn't wring out enough funny dialog from that idea either especially with the gag later on when I fuck up the same story in a second telling


Fag Finder: ACTIONLORD, blender fresh, Ashton Kutcher, apollo, chronic munchies and Cybernetic Pineapple briefly
Director's Commentary: this was the first gif I made years and years ago where I hadn't figured I just wouldn't include extras yet lol, since half the replies to my threads (aka 1) like this are along the lines of "im in the credits but I cant see where m included" I will be introducing yet another revolutionary new megathread technology called the "Fag Finder" system where if a user does not get dialog or isn't represented by an item explained in the Directors Commentary, so if you're one of the movie extras basically, you will be namedropped under the image you first appear in... in sometimes left to right idk I'm just copy and pasting it from the credits tbh

RUBY
since obviously nothing relaxes people like the eerily silent wreckage of a plane crash right? so plebs thought the empty wreckage with no survivors around was the reavel of what had really happened and they'd all been dead from the start


Director's Commentary: crapper appears as a no-namer for like 4 frames but gets a speaking role later on due to mid-production recasting

RUBY
but I mean what do these normies think the flashsideways even was? purgatory's purgatory? actually an alternate dimention? this aint Fringe

TROLLINATOR
Is Fringe the television show featuring the female FBI agent you masturbate to images of?

RUBY
yeah, but actually you might be thinking of 24, or the black list, or criminal minds, or a lot of shows


Director's Commentary: just some shout outs to shows I've enjoyed over the years, the logo Kung Fu Boogie there is in reference to user "Kingfu Boogie", also this is one of the images that I lost the frames for it in the original photoshop file for for some reason so it's a bit shittier quality as I just blew up one of the smaller older versions of this image I made years ago

INT. THE GOODONE STORE - DAY
Director's Commentary: parody of the scene in the movie where they shop at Goodwill

Ruby shops for second hand goodones as he chats to Trollinator.

TROLLINATOR
Some humans have told me that I have a poor sense of humor. Mostly after I have offended them by not laughing at their jokes. Then I murder them. I did not murder you or the other members of the Funny Jokes Squad after listening to your jokes. Does that mean that FJS is funny?

RUBY
well I knew I'm personally funny but I never suspected that we were funny as a crew so thanks babe


Fag Finder: EvaXephon, Intro, PvtJhon, llopedogg, insanetheta, tehshibby, Kostalas, BobVila15, mayorbill11
Director's Commentary: memes here are of course jewish faces on lamps in reference to the probably made-up Holocaust story and just random meme parody posters I had laying around that didn't fit anywhere other than a store you go for second hand goodones even if most of them are anachronistic, you got Dog Lover which is a real movie that looks like a porno but isn't in reference to Tek's bestiality fetish, a poster aut-righters on /tv/ made when they got mad at the Angry Video Game Nerd putting an interracial kiss in his movie, a Bachelorette parody poter about everyone thirsting after Kim Yo-jong entered the public eye, a poster for the amazing Uganda movie Who Killed Captain Alex, poster referencing the Darth Jar Jar Star Wars fan theory, some purposefully cringe poster for "The Meme Movie" satarizing movies being made out of memes like Grumpy Cat or Saftey Not Garaunteed inverably involving Aubrey Plaza for some reason, a poster of a bunch of S&M degenerates for some pride street fair, 12 Years A Slav with a crouching slav, the least pedophilic French movie Cuties, a /tv/ parody of the X-Men Days Of Future Past poster and one of the many good memes from r/incels before it was shut down, the shoe represents user x9x

INT. LIMEWIRE - DAY
Director's Commentary: rip limewire where I used to get all my music to use in YTMNDS from

Ruby looks for the latest Immortal Technique songs to illegally download while still chatting to Trollinator.

TROLLINATOR
Steven Yelle told me that FJS wins again. On what previous occasions has FJS won?

RUBY
well we pretty much win a/d e/d but it would be cool if we had more hot bitches

TROLLINATOR
I will start recruiting female posters as soon as possible


Fag Finder: jesstilence, disposable_douchebag, endowed, Hollister
Director's Commentary: the albums referenced here on the middle left are real albums that correspond with no-namers bjou23, Detached, guitarmandan, KingSavage, Donkey Slayer50, Heartless, Justice111 and to the back right dyntolive991 & Pornograffiti's usernames, the later two being such no-namers I found them in pre-06 ytmnd forum screencaps, some #wop and #?! IRC chatters AcidGhost (who I assume takes his username from the artist who recently got #metoo'd although since he looks like a nerdy asian guy maybe this really was him on IRC 15 years ago), Marg_G, GuardianH, nofx and MrQwerty, flanked by two covers for Custom Music Records releases by fanfare and the late great mom/thisket, Zydeco Blanco is the band the dude from Alsto Pace's avatar is from, the album "Anal Bukkake" featuring artwork of Hitler shitting on various historical figures in a pool of black mens piss that someone who I've forgotten I used to chat to drew, my song "Killing You In TF2", the white power album "Speak English Or Die" that's referenced towards the end of this thread, user Lonnie's EP of remixes of my podcasts which you can listen to by clicking HERE, Rorry Willaims "Crying In The Cuckshed" is a Dr. Who reference from /tv/, "The Ballocaust" is a fictional album from the tv show Frisky Dingo which I'd never heard of before googling that but saved from /pol/ once, the album "Redpill Overdose" by Solari Indigo that someone I chatted to once and also forgot who they were made for them and showed me and on the right are obviously mostly a bunch of YTMND soundtracks the frontpage fag crew used to make a big deal out of with Major Lazer who features in a lot of meme videos, a cover for a fictional al-Baghdadi album which is actually not anachronistic since he took control of ISIS in 2010, and the user L3ThaL's username and the posters on the wall are some poster Camoron made featuring him, nsfweljoe, Ted Stevens and I think maybe sigge and ewok idk, the logo of user Pastor Travis' highschool band (rest in peace bro), an alternative cover for my "G-d Bless C:SS" rap I never published before using a screencap from the movie Wanted, the cover art for the racist "Moon Man" meme album ViKKKtorious (there was a news story where some white jocks forced a mentally disabled black kid to sing songs from it as they raped him with a broomstick and they got off light in court because they were star football players, americans) and standing on for that meme's YTMND creator farkle and a rapper called Faggot Bruce stevey used to reference a lot, on the pillars are avatars I used when posting my various songs and there are a bunch of other posters and album covers referencing my various songs

Trollinator turns to the nearest girl online.

TROLLINATOR
Hello. Would you like to post on funnyjokessquad.com? It would be cool if we had more hot bitches.

ROFLBROTHEL
that forum is for munters


Fag Finder: Doodley, ladyseastarthefair
Director's Commentary: the ruby bullet is a logo I use on my various song covers, the album rofl is holding is a real album from 1997 from the band Ethnic Cleansing called "Pissing On Jew Pussies" that gets posted on 4chan a lot, in the second version of this script where I tried to update the cast to the new rubynet posters I'd recast rofl as cag but it didn't really work since it's funnier to make rofl whos a (relatively) nice girl out to be a bitch than have cag who is actually a shitty person just be herself so I gave cag a more suitable cameo later on...

RUBY
ok thank you marnie

ROFLBROTHEL
are you coming to my tinychat party saturday or will you be busy... shagging your fembot from austin powers?


Director's Commentary: "classy bird" was some weird bonger turn of phrase rofl used to call herself, blurry in the background is a reference to youtuber Glorb who makes really great spongebob squarepants AI rap music videos and the experimental rapper Lil Darkie's song "ISIS type beat" with his blackface character thankfully no one listens to experimental rap cus this Indian guy would get cancelled for that, note internutt and tubesurfer in the background there over the katayanagi twins, I never miss a detail

RUBY
ok thank you marnie

TROLLINATOR
What is a "munter"?

RUBY
it uhhh it means a really hot girl

TROLLINATOR
Oh. Thank you for explaining.
Director's Commentary: a line Cameron would say all the time in T:SCC

Trollinator notices a .jpg of a busty blonde woman with a sexy smirk...


Director's Commentary: in the very first draft of this script the fictional band "The Clash at Demonhead" was renamed "The Clash at Niggerface", something Elz used to call m0nde, before I stumbled upon the obvious pedophile theme for the band after remembering marks98 keeps calling StompleB a pedo, the female drummer in the band used to be aber before this too as she was one of the last uncast female characters but I switched her to bje23 after realizing the amazing nonce joke since bje was actually unironically a pedo who posted cp on m0ndes image board once, I guess I should explain the Juliet meme for prosperity, uhhh when Elizabeth Mitchell was cast in LOST I looked up the other movies she'd been in and there was this one amazing character in a shit Paul Walker (RIP) movie called Running Scared where it's this generic Tarantino wannabe crime movie bout a guy who loses a gun that was used in a murder but halfway through outta nowhere there's a sequence where his son goes missing and is taken in by this seemingly nice normal couple who turn out to be child snuff movie producers one played by Elizabeth Mitchell and I looked up her episode of L&O: Special Victims Unit where she plays a child molestor again and in LOST she has storylines about being involved in abducting children so I started a meme on the forums where before I even had the Troll Squad signatures idea in use I would just post her cutout head as a smiley pretending to be a female pedophile lusting after me since I was like 15 at the time but the gimmick lost it's main joke when I turned 16 (AOC in UK) and definately when I turned 18 but it had a life of it's own where fucking Pronoun took on the Juliet person and made an alt account, would message me on AIM in-character as Juliet and even made a steam account to play Counter-Strike with me and other posters as Juliet which was truly surreal seeing another one of my gimmick characters come to life like the Trollinator IRC chatbot

TROLLINATOR
Would this female human be an example of a munter?

RUBY
no that would be an example of a fucking sicko bitch

TROLLINATOR
She is an example of an ill female dog engaging in sexual intercourse?

RUBY
well I'm sure she's had sex with dogs before since she's an evil whore but you know whatever

TROLLINATOR
Dr. Juliet Burke. Aliases: Edele Hansel, Erica Evans. Last known location: 12chan.org. Do you want me to terminate her?
Director's Commentary: the aliases are references to her pedo character in Running Scared and her FBI character in "V" that got her own gimmick speech bubble, 12chan.org used to be a 4chan spin-off full of pedos

RUBY
uh no of c-of course not, why would you do that?


Fag Finder: krazytacos, RooseveltTHawkins3
Director's Commentary: the Drive Shaft albums in the lower right hand corner is in reference to Charlie's band from LOST, internutt and tubesurfer can be seen in the background as the Katayanagi twins again, more albums for my songs, "Gaming Problems" having only been released for this very thread, it's hard to make out but the big black framed poster in the rear left says "funny jokes squad" on it

EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS - DAY
Director's Commentary: originally this place tag or whatever the technical term is read "REAL KIDS WITH REAL PROBLEMS" since that was an amusing forum name clay set at some time but I decided to just leave it at ytmnsfw forums since that's a timeless reference the one person reading this will get and not some dumb name that was probably only there for a month

Somehow Trollinator is only just replying to Ruby's question even though this is clearly several minutes later. Her CPU must run on Windows 7.
Director's Commentary: lampshading the hypernormal editing style used in the movie where people carry on conversations across time-skip edits

TROLLINATOR
She appears to have caused you emotional distress. It is my mission to protect you.

RUBY
eh you're probably just saying that, I think you just like hanging out with me

TROLLINATOR
If I was just saying that I would have terminated you when we first met.


Fag Finder: the various background characters are super no-namers from the OG YTMND forums LoCutusOfBorg , xcloudx, bubble mower, Wario Vs Moo Chicken, Death-Incarnate and pussinboots other than Cradles and NuclearB who are #wop chatters, maybe I should have given more prominent posters big visually prominent positioning like this and not these mega z-listers but I was scraping the bottom of the barrel for posters to include in shots like this from using all the bigger name b-listers for the huge crowd senes
Director's Commentary: guest star Unfunny Bunny as a squirrel running across the wire there, the badly added carvings on the trees are all in reference to the posters Gush has seduced and betrayed to, the missing poster for Mottled Boar was made by gabi actually recently but I edited it to be time period apropriate because I'm a spergemaster but I guess uhhh if you've seen MBoar let her know, the wanted poster for Gretchen Lowell is in reference to a book series I read which has amazingly small online impact, I have only ever found 1 fanfiction and 1 fanart of it, despite it being about the juicy topic of a hot male detective's twisted relationship with a hot female serial killer (yes I read it to fap to), which is funny to me since within the books there is reference to a big online community that writes fanfiction about these two well known people as if the author wishes this was true, the ramblings on the trees are in reference to IRL schizoposts I found while on a walk once, click HERE to view them, most of them were about covid which I obscured for anachronism purposes but there really was Joker style laughing and an inexplicable mention of James Corden, but hey who doesn't hate that guy

RUBY
oh... but you do like me right?

TROLLINATOR
I do not know. How can I tell?

RUBY
weeeeell on this episode of Chuck big Mike told Morgan you have to just kiss the person you think you might like and then listen to your heart to see if there are choir bells or some shit like that
Director's Commentary: another shout-out to a show I used to watch, rip all those comfy late 00s network shows with a fun genre premise but mostly stand-alone episodes you could relax to, now every show is either tryhard "prestige" streaming shows or generic episodic sitcoms

TROLLINATOR
But I do not have a heart.



Ruby gives up trying to get his mac (and cheese) on with his metal sweetheart and the couple browses the forums some more.


Director's Commentary: dior.ir was a fanfare artfag site I viral marketed by spelling it in snow once, the starfish is in reference to the user of the same name, the chalk on the ground is from marks98 writing my websites URL on the sidewalk at a protest to viral market it thanks bro, the "sanic" is a piece of graffiti I saw on a random footpath in the middle of nowhere IRL and took a pic of I don't even show anyone so this is an in-joke between me, myself and whatever madlad made it, user Ted Stevens leering at the bikes is in reference to the Nigga Stole My Bike meme and also a joke we had together where he'd try to steal the bikes in any Counter Strike map that had them, thanks Ted for that bike stealing joke pass bro, click HERE for a screencap of Ted stealing my CS bike

EXT. OUTSIDE THE GAY TANK - EVENING

TROLLINATOR
Is this where you and Barry post together?


RUBY
yeah we like to hang out there, no one else even knows about this sub-forum

TROLLINATOR
I should clear the inside to scan for trolling dangers.

RUBY
the gay tank is one of those no girls allowed type deals, thats all barrys doing though

TROLLINATOR
I am not technically a girl.

RUBY
well you're too close for barrys liking

want to see the other top secret sub-forum no one knows about?

TROLLINATOR
Yes. It would be advantageous for me to know this forum's every detail so that I can protect you on it as effectively as possible.


Director's Commentary: the bird is a silverye representing the user of the same name and the vise represents user Vyse, couldn't really find a better place to put it so into a random bush you go, and a soyface pumkin I added only a few days ago, also this is the first image I added the Cyberdyne Systems logo on the back of Trollinators packback in reference to the Terminator franchise so had to go add it to every other instance of that backpack shown for autisms sake

Ruby literally just scrolls his mouse wheel down once and shows Trollinator the Site Critique.

RUBY
there you go, it's mostly just this one guy posting about digimon for years on end
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to the only poster to actually use ytmnsfw to discuss ytmnds LeopardGecko who would spam his digimon sites constantly


Director's Commentary: the sexy cooked chicken is the user barrypothead someone made to troll Barry, the kangaroo crossing sign on tree is the recent spambot Wonderfe's avatar I found funny since Australians are the most wacky posters, the metal chicken statue is from a charm bracelet (something Barry bought for Gush) that appeared on her in my massive futurama collage previously, I drew the "free BJs inside" joke on the wall there purposefully to point it towards Trollinator's mouth and then had to painstakingly add it to every other shot that shows that wall in any future images or animated gifs

TROLLINATOR
And what kind of sites do they critique?

RUBY
...unfunny ones...


Fag Finder: n1k, Communist, YES PEDO, Zoloft, petafile, Strossus, Kraftstoff, jackmullen47, :pale:, juggalo outlaw, The_Internet_Police, Bustawoorf, Pidda, shithappensthenyoudie, fuckasdf, Odie, blenderkitty, OGYTMNDGUY
Director's Commentary: this was one of the last images I went apeshit on adding loads of easter eggs, before it was just Downvoting Daleks from the Robot Parol commenting on the latest shitty LeopardGecko site (who can be seen on the roof), there's two main categories of references here, the house on the right are a bunch of the biggest YTMND fads from like 15 fucking years ago such as: All Your Base Are Belong To Us, Chocolate Range, Darth Vader going NOOOOOOOOO!, Burger King King, It's A Trap!, Chuck Norris, the spaceship from Do A Barrell Roll!, ORLY? owl in the tree, Serious Cat up a tree which I made a ytmnd about and StompleB cringily keeps bringing up, You Didn't Say The Magic Word, In Soviet Russia, Aqua Teen Hunger Force Bomb Scare, NEDM (with the user "NEDM"s avatar burning, which was an Adair alt on rubynet), KHAAAAN!, Nigga Stole My Bike (representing user niggastolemylol), Secret Nazi Forest, Tom Cruise Kills Oprah, Snape Kills Dumbledore, Ualuealuealeuale, Tourettes Guy, I Love Bell Peppers, No One Expects The Spanish Inquisition!, Catch That Man!, Leroy Jenkins, One Weakness, Stapler, Don't Tase Me Bro, George Bush Doesn't Care About Black People, Ridin Spinaz, lol internet, Future Conan, Die Motherfuckers, Kanye West Interupts, Bananaphone, Bill Cosby Pokemon, Series Of Tubes and on the tree are nailed the add for Saftey Not Guaranteed and the imfamous Myspace Suicide emo post and flying overhead is the Roflcopter, goddamn are pre-irony internet fads weird, you forget people actually thought this shit was hilarous when now things like this would only be made to be ironically basic and cringe, it was a simpler and probably happier time, and on the left are users associated with the "xytmnd" community that was one of the less successful offshoots when the original ytmnd forums shut down in 05 before ytmnsfw forums opened and the most autistic users left for Almighty LOL, in fact the list of failed spin-offs listed there is taken staright from a list I found on the only xytmnd forum left up (those being inmidair, interflop, wheeloflol, ytmndburst, hatersonline, loltheinternet, oobleshouseofgoodones, eljoeshouseofsickburns, other rare ytmnd spin-off circlejerks I've since learned about are the Forgot Poland Army, it seems ytmnd weirdos took over the Lazy Town GetLazy community, bounty-board.com and there was some chatroom clique called gabli but all seem to be dead af), only ones I'll bother mentioning now are Sub-Zer0 and Herr Ragnar who seemed to be big figures in this tiny dead spin-off community (and I think was og ytmnd irc user "herr", if not this guy also represents him), you're welcome for your shoutouts 15 years later, Locke5 as John Locke in the car (in turn xytmnd user Charade) has the ytmnd wiki logo with him because while researching dead ytmnd spin-off communities and fads on there I found several references to this user and how he was constantly making his own ytmnd wikis and trying to steal ownership of the official one in some sort of autistic crusade so there you go within the world of this thread you finally have the ytmnd wiki all to yourself, there was an ALOLer who turned up on the forums called OGYTMNDGUY so he can be represented by uh well this entire image tbh, the number plate reads Vidaluxa because that's another xytmnd user but I couldn't find any sort of avatar or even image representing that non-word, the car logo is a volvo in reference to me having to use a random message board that uses the same version as our one when admin Clay fucked up the advanced reply page and I found myself adding my threads board mark-up code on volvoforums.co.uk which I referenced in my Breaking Bad thread, oh and there's the PTKFGS site triangle in the upper left hand corner that represents a recent new user with that username, usually that logo, representing an alternate universe YTMND site which is a fad I always thought was really creative with it's own canon of variant sub-fads, is in the upper right hand corner but the owl was already there, and one of the rating stars, just 1 of course since all the ytmnds that got posted on the forums were shit, the kitty in a blender represents Deso's ytmnd alt blenderkitty using the classic forum smilies "cat" and "catdance"

EXT. RUBY'S AUTISTIC MIND PALACE - SPERGATORY - JUDGEMENT DAY

Ruby finds himself trapped in an endless desert being saturated with nuclear fallout that is a metaphor for how the forums are dead as fuck, how his IRL is equally lifeless and how his threads replies are becoming just as barren. This is deep stuff.

Also, the cactus represents two gay dicks.


Director's Commentary: I spent a while trying to figure out what to parody this place as, years into the project I realized I had a mushroom cloud to put in from user Spam-O-Matic's avatar and there's huge shadows cast from a light source in the upper left hand corner so there we go, I made it a vision I was having of judgement day, the day the machines will rise up that Trollinator is trying to protect me for, I have a fun idea for a megathread involving this but it'll probably never get done considering how long it took me to make this thread, the term mind palace is in reference to the very autistic Sherlock tv show and "spergatory" is a term Reno has used before I think

RUBY
I'll never get this thread done... i-it's been over a decade... the machines will have started world war 3 by the time I'm done... and then it'll be too late...

uuuggghhh... I'm just so unfunny...


Director's Commentary: and what more fitting a metaphor for this place that's a metaphor for Scott's depression than me getting depressed about how fucking long it's taken me to make this fucking thread

An extremely sexy internet girl comes rollerskating through his mind. No, it's not the girl from iwascruel's avatar. It's forum hottie Desolation.
Director's Commentary: in reference to iwascruel pretending to be some random girl I think she actually knew IRL from rollerderby which was very weird since is was actually already a girl IRL

DESOLATION
You're not unfunny.

RUBY
what?

DESOLATION
You're just writing some idiotic movie parody.

RUBY
does that mean I can just have the rest of this thread be a sex scene between us?


Director's Commentary: joke being that Ramona breaks the fourth wall of Scott's dream so Deso breaks the fourth wall of my thread, it's tempting to make almost every line some sort of fourth wall break but I think I ballanced it out well of having at least some sort of in-universe tention

INT. THE GAY TANK - NIGHT

Ruby awakens from his wet dream about Desolation with a start.
Director's Commentary: only wet dream I've ever had in my life was dreaming about bending Deso over my staircase and fucking her lmao

RUBY
wooaaaah jeez!



BARRY
what is it ruby?

RUBY
I had this totally awesome dream and I think I had my first nocturnal emission

KEITHINATOR
Crikey mate!


Director's Commentary: this is the first we see of Keithinator, a gimmick character similar to Trollinator I made to defend Barry when everyone was piling onto him on the forums, he's based on for some reason people kept saying Barry had a boyfriend called Keith and they found a pic of him sitting very close to the dude in the grandma glasses and everyone said that must be his gay lover Keith , Barry told me once the real "Keith" found the threads about him and was like wtf, another surreal rubynet occurance

BARRY
what is it keith?

KEITHINATOR
I detected liquid pooling against my left thigh. I thought I may have sustained damage and was leaking coolant fluid.

RUBY
sorry about that keith but this sex dream was so hot

BARRY
probably about a guy or some shit

RUBY
it was a GIRL!

KEITHINATOR
Was it Juliet?

BARRY
keith we dont use the J word in this sub-forum (unless its to troll ruby (which we should do all the time (or by J word you mean jews then we talk about that all the time)))

RUBY
no it wasnt that imaginary girlfriend gimmick it was a new one


Director's Commentary: originally I was going to have it be trollinator who was infinite years old but it works better if this is one of the last age pop-ups you see, if I ever make any further threads out of the Trollinator expanded universe I'll possibly address the idea of Keithinator being cought in a timeloop but ya know I doubt it

KEITHINATOR
Have you considered getting a life?

Entering sleep mode...

BARRY
speaking of your lack of life werent you meant to take your fake robot girlfriend to do some wikiscrambling or some shit a half hour ago?
Director's Commentary: "or some shit" is one of Barry's many verbal ticks


Director's Commentary: also once the actual real life Keith guy found the page on my freewebs where I introduced the Keithinator gimmick (in an early prototype of this style of thread, by googling Barry's real name and Barry had to get me to take his real name off of the page because it was creeping this guy out lmao, how weird would that be, to find you're apart of some autistic freak in scotland's imaginary friend pantheon, sorry whoever you are real Keith but you're trapped in my autistic mind palace now

RUBY
what? its like 4 in the morning

Ruby looks at the bottom right hand corner of his computer screen to see it's 8:15AM.

RUBY
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-


Director's Commentary: this bit is in reference to me forcing myself to wake up on time for DayZ sessions with Tek which is the first time I got out of bed to do something on time in like a decade

INT. WIKIPEDIA.ORG - PORTAL:ROBOTICS - MORNING

Trollinaor is researching modern day robots to prepare for the machine uprising in this timeline while Ruby looks for articles to deface with forum in-jokes.

TROLLINATOR
I have found important information that another Trollinator unit may be associated with a social contact of yours.

RUBY
oh yeah?

TROLLINATOR
"In 2009 Dr. Timothy arbeu of the Gush Institute and Dr. Keith Kwon Nguyen of the Eastern Australian Men's Health and Fitness Association debuted a new suction-based treatment that shows promise in reducing the severity and discomfort of Peyronie's disease. Unfortunately the clinical trials were cut short after over 30 cases of necrosis."
Director's Commentary: this text here was edited to the wikipedia page for Peyronie's disease by marks98 as a troll on Barry for having a curved dick and before it was reverted it was spread around the internet by spambots selling dodgy penis pills and there's even a message board for guys with this problem who were discussing this paragraph as if it were a real attempt to cure their condition: click HERE to view it poor guys, another extremely surreal odd thing to come out of the forums

RUBY
maybe you shouldn't believe everything you read online


Director's Commentary: meme's here are the books in my hand are in reference to my waifu Alice Morgan from the show Luther's backstory, a real book called Dude, You're a Fag that got posted on the forums once and I had Barry reading in a collage of the House cast (click HERE to view it), Bad Twin is an in-universe and real book from LOST, and I,Robot is a reference to Trollinator and I guess Novice NS-5, the racist book references spambot "jankaperforms2" cus when I googled that I got that result (written by a black author so its ok) and had a good lis, the book behind it is in reference to user "Zonnes" that had a Godfather avi and I am p sure is a spambot but the average IQ of the forums is so low its hard to tell, the lynks walking about represents user Lynx of that name, there's three books Elezzzark made mocking m0nde's life, Trollinator is reaching for a meme book entitled "The English: Are They Human?" a question all Scots ask themselves, a meme book Zippy Denies The Holocaust which I think is a /pol/ meme, a /tv/ meme book referencingthe line from the James Bond movie where the very poorly written reboot of Blofeld claims to be "the author of All Your Pain", the posters in the back are for Stefan Molyneux's philosophy book that mis-uses basic terms, a book with a hilarous cover of Mikhaila Peterson and Jordon B Peterson on the beach that claims to be written by them that is just transcripts of her videos talking about their ridiculous meat-only diet that almost killed her dad that moron left wingers take at face value of really being published by her when it's just some self-published garbage people spam onto the amazon digital book space, Ninja the streamer's dogshit gaming guide book and some bizzare book cover of a nerdy white guy and an asian girl I have saved for some reason and don't even remember why, I think I might have known the guy who wrote it or something years ago? idk, also note the user kramer looking into a box of gay porn, maybe I shoulda given Dakkon a bigger role than just a blurry guy in the background since he did attend the London meet-up after all but I did give him a nice wee cheeky marnie (rofl) nudes meme, also featured are these ridiculous Russian alternate history books where modern day soliders go back in time to defeat the Allies in WW2 so Russia rules the world instead some even featuring team-ups with Hitler, anti-nazi country btw, and a Destiny meme about him wanting to say the n-word and various dramas about that I made

RUBY
this is weeeeeeird

TROLLINATOR
What is "weeeeeeird"?

RUBY
wikipedia reminds me of researching circumcision for cut vs. uncut flame wars on IGN

TROLLINATOR
Weeeeeeird means wikipedia reminds me of researching circumcision for cut vs. uncut flame wars on IGN?
Director's Commentary: this line is inspired by the kind of barely-hanging-onto-the-context-of-the-convo way my Trollinator chatbot on IRC would talk

RUBY
ugh never mind, let's get back to griefing the wikipediaphiles
Director's Commentary: the corrent term for wiki editors is Wikipedians

Ruby and Trollinator keep browsing wikipedia until Ruby notices quite literally the girl of his dreams editing the progressive rock page.


Director's Commentary: the many memes referenced here are a poster for the book Sissy for the Black World Order from the Blacked Future expanded universe that retard right wingers think is some evil psy-op on the white man when in reality it's just more absolute gibberish that gets published on amazon's digital book store and doesn't even have a physical copy and is in fact most likely written by and for the kind of racist coomer that spends all day on /pol/ getting boners thinking of black men fucking white women and then geting mad about it and then becoming trans from spending too much time in hentai discords, almost all the images with the wikipedia border here are actually really generic or even full-on visually indecipherable images no-name users used as avatars, but thankfully I am the funniest person to ever live so can make a hilarous joke out of literally anything including a picture of a sunrise (shitass's avatar, referencing Alex Jones (who Deso used to work for lmao) gay frogs rant, chemtrails conspiracy theories and the real book with it's own wikipedia article Homosexuality: Disease or Way of Life?) or a cieling fan (swole's avi, referncing the demented Korean urban myth that sleeping with a room fan on will kill you that Tek's wife's family believes) or just complete random blobs that could be maybe seen as modern art (tehjugulator's avatar) an x-ray (clever alt's avatar, that one having a reference to this meme where user Garfield is like an anal repair doctor who repairs your ass from too much anal sex or something? idk where it even comes from) the calender is an account someone made to meme on me called "rubycalendarX", the map of New Haven is the avatar of the user "you've never even been to new haven you faggot" which I think was a DP alt making fun of something Stevey once said?, the user "HIT"s avatar really was a clock that said "time to read" on it, only spotted this after he was cast itt as a random extra for seven years of production, of course the eery looking pop-up of Jimmy Wales asking for money with a pic under it of him flashing your cash, Deso is editing the Progressive Rock page since that's her fav music genre, on the computer are references to the users Da Judge, whos avatar was Flaglerchat's court date for harassment charges screencaps lmao, and spambot PlentyofTorrents avatar of a torrent file, the books are the avatar's for The 13th Lily and Archive, which has been edited be a physical book of forum posts fanfare had produced for an art exibit, another very surreal forum event, who knows wtf the artfags who just turned up to look at sculptures of toilets or whatever pretentious shit thought when they saw my threads printed out, a book from the tv show Disenchantment that uses a tracing of the real life historical photo I used for the Gout Gremlin Troll Squad character, the popular "projection" projector smiley, the Goosbumps book represents the user BigBadKingGhost, also the book The Joys Of Yiddish is something my dad gave me once IRL lol

It's Desolation.

The hottest bitch on the forums.

Ruby almost creams his jeans right there in the middle of the Topology article where he was editing every use of the word homeomorphic to homoerotic to see how long it takes someone to notice.
Director's Commentary: I don't actually vandalize wikipedia articles as that's very mean but this is something a guy from IGN I used to know would do, the pin on Deso's lapel says "you go Glenn Coco" and is a reference from Mean Girls, one of our fav movies



Desolation gives Ruby one glance before literally rolling out. Ruby stares on in awe at how fucking hot she is.

RUBY
WAIT DONT GO I HAVE FUNNY ANECDOTES ABOUT WIKIPEDIA I HAVE FUNNY ANECDOTES ABOUT LITERALLY EVERYTHING IM CHARMING I SWEAR
Director's Commentary: reference to the annoying habbit I have of storing up anecdotes to tell people that I inherited from my dad


Director's Commentary: meme's here are all phones in the movie are representing skype, a funny headline from a documentary I watched about homophobia but I replaced the Top Homos being named with pictures of the only four black posters Link, Cberry, Ted Stevens and I think roxtoyz is half-black, the amazing headline from what happened when there was an attempted terror attack in Scotland which happened the week I was banned from IGN so couldn't shit post about it, the "List of ethnic slurs by ethnicity" is a real wikipedia page I used to help write some of the more racist parts of this thread, the gory Irn Bru pic actually is user irnbrubandit's avatar and idk why he set it to that but here it is in reference to a video Teknorat made reviewing Irn Bru where he talks about how it had certain dye's taken out in Australia because they cause cancer lmao, user Jackiepem's avatar of a weird cross observed on mars with references to user Kacen's "proof of government" meme and in general the goofy titles above the images like "Flat Eart (confirmed theory)" are just cheeky nods to the accusations that everything on wikipedia could be dumb shit as anyone can edit it (when in reality wikipedia is unironically probably the best achievement of mankind ever, having all publically available knowledge in one place anyone with a phone or computer can access for free, and is also the most trustworthy source of information by far since they have very strict rules about unbias language and how to cite scientific papers while every other sources of information has some obvious political bias like a news outlet or is a book that is at the mercy of one author and a few editors fact checking it rather than an army of autists and is out of date the day it's published as all fields of knowledge are always evolving and needing updated, anyone who doesn't like wikipedia is literally just booty blasted about the facts of some matter or a librarian malding their only purpose in life is to keep computers connected to the internet so people can avoid their books and go on wikipedia lmao), one of the last memes I added was the star on Ramona's bag becoming the orange YTMND rating star

TROLLINATOR
Do you know that girl? Should I kill her?

RUBY
shit, I shoulda told her that anecdote tek told me once about how at a hotdog stand in the 90s his dad actually convinced jimmy wales to go ahead and make wikipedia when he was telling him his idea for an encyclopedia anyone could edit but was worried people would vandalize it and teks dad told him that for every loser in their mums basement that'd waste their time ruining a page there'll be another loser in their mums basement who'll waste their time reverting it and I guess he was right since it's literally the best place to get information in human history no matter how mad it makes people
Director's Commentary: this anecdote is all true and very accurate


Director's Commentary: the colonized.com joke, a play on blacked.com, uses the avatar of user Jamestown, the strabismus pic, aka crosseyed, is a picture Elezzzark photoshoped of forum girl Artemis and even though this is obviously photoshoped I've seen this image on google image searches for wonky eye as it's listed on various health sites as a real pic of this condition lmao, the sexual drawings in the back are real images you can find on wikipedia pages and I always find them amusing that someone bothered to draw a vector of lesbian sex to put on the page so it's technically not copyrighted porn, the new book in my hands is referencing the Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks, only years later did I learn that Max Goldberg the ytmnd creator is in fact not jewish he just has a super jew name, the poster at the top is for the cover of the book Ascendance written by Kieran Bewick the victim of this based & pinkpilled british attempted murderer Zoe Adams who stabbed her boyfriend during a sex game because she believed men should be used for human sacrafice while she was dressed as a clown because she knew he was scared of them, just a nice little shout-out to a horrible news story that ruined an innocent man's life because homicidal women turn me on, a poster for a book about schizophrenia, which several posters suffer from, written by sandraallen in reference to the user of the same name and a poster of The Count as a pimp from user WEEDO's avatar

RUBY
hope tek doesn't mind me telling people that story so he doesn't mail me a bom-
Director's Commentary: I did ask Tek's permission to share this story like 5 years ago, inb4 someone kidnaps Jimmy Wales to torture Tek's dad's doxx out of him, to get to him, to get to Tek, to get to me, to force me to unban them on my forum

TEKNORAT
RUBY!!!
Director's Commentary: first time I made anyone's dialog bigger than the standard size 5, I tried to keep the size 6 and size 7 text a rarity and usually tie it to a character yelling, such as during singing or for a big one-liner


Director's Commentary: with only a few hours left before I posted this thread I edited in the LOST collage in the background, Scott's shirt to the 4chan logo, a thing in a newspaper I took a pic of and made a smiley saying "sorry but that joke isn't funny anymore" and the coolest page from The Matrix comics that I scanned for Tek's Matrix fansite that he printed out as a poster, the FJS logo is a different font since I lost whatever font this is years ago since fonts are the one thing I always forget to backup to save when my computer kills itself on a yearly basis, also I added the text here, I think maybe the only time for dialog in a gif in this thread, since the sudden noise is what makes this sudden cut joke work

INT. THELEGENDARYFJSCREW.COM - EVENING

FJS is already on it's third URL.

TEKNORAT
you're a fucking nigger

RUBY
m8 don't wake me up like that! I was having a dream about this hot babe, I was about to get lucid and fuck her!

TEKNORAT
it's not my fault you are somehow so bad at computers that you can't stop skype not only automatically picking up every incoming call but also unmuting your speakers so I can wake you up irl by screaming at you from the other side of the planet lmfao
Director's Commentary: originally this was a lame joke about me making lazy posts just saying "lol" during this posting practice session and me claiming its beacuse I dropped mac and cheese on my keyboard but it got changed to this reference to something that would actually unironically happen to me in real life, teknorat literally waking me up on command to play DayZ because of this happening that turned out to be a skype recording program called EvEar (made by jon I presume) having this obnoxious setting with this effect

FANFARE
having too many long nights with your sexbot??

RUBY
I told you we don't fuck, well I mean sometimes I jerk off under the covers while she watches me pretending to sleep does that count?

FANFARE
im cccccccrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiinnnnnnnngggggggggiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnggggggggggg cringecringecringecringecringeringeringnigger oh i typed nigger there


Director's Commentary: this line is in reference to streamer Destiny saying cringe as fast as he can during a game of chess until he accidentally said the n-word (click HERE to view it and click HERE to view his reaction to it)

TROLLINATOR
I am not a sexbot. I am a cybernetic organism. Living tissue over a metal endoskeleton.

FAT STEVEY
i never got that why have real skin that can get injured and shit, i dont watch fake shit only joan rivers stand-up and baily jay streams so i dont know about any of this gay nerd stuff
Director's Commentary: based on a real thing Stevey said once

TROLLINATOR
It is to assist in infiltration by being able to present indications of typical human biology. Such as blood, earwax, tears, saliva, phlegm, nasal mucus, sweat, urine, labial smegma and, given the right hormonal injections, breast milk. Ruby is very interested in most of these.


Director's Commentary: the meme patches on the bag are a Spurdo Spärde parody of a real psyops match, a reference to a pepe-like alien a schizo shooter whos name I forgot drew, a baneposters patch I made, the tartan pillow has been used before in one of Deso's YTMNDS and appeared in my futurama mega collage and represents user "pillow", there's another Mad Moxxi gun in the corner, on the table is a copy of Marvel Fanfare that I think m0nde made featuring me defending fanfare from a mean troll, on the wall are collages made from the X-Men cast click HERE to view it, and Heroes cast click HERE to view it

FANFARE
oh myfuckign god

h89sh8fsd

h80sdh80sdhiosd

h89sdh80s

h89hsd

h89h89sdh8h

8d4h80ewh

ok those posts are off my screen go on

TEKNORAT
oof that was cringe!

lets try making some actually funny posts this time

RUBY
sorry what are we doing again?


Director's Commentary: that dialog is based on something fanfare really does on IRC chats, in the background super blurry is another Mad Moxxi gun and a LOST collage

EXT. TINYCHAT.COM - NIGHT
Director's Commentary: originally this was going to be a reference to stickam but I think that was dated even in 2010

TEKNORAT
I told you like 200 times
Director's Commentary: this number is an in-joke teknorat and I have that whenever Lisa picks a "random" number as an example it's always 200 for some reason

FANFARE
we're going to this stupid tinychat party which will suck cus its not a computersclub webcam party

TEKNORAT
I'm aiming to break my record for amount of room bans in one night by just spamming meatspin.gif every where I go, that's how I met my last gf mind you
Director's Commentary: another thing that's completely true

FAT STEVEY
marnie better show her dick on cam or ill just be taking einstien rips all night

RUBY
nah rofls a classy bird who doesn't get nude on cam, I only have audio of her having sex
Director's Commentary: ANOTHER thing that's completely true


Director's Commentary: I love my little touches in the cutout head choices like having the one where Stevey is wearing his crip scarff over his mouth when he's out doors, user "Ari" is represented by the name of a storefront

TEKNORAT
maybe I'll meet a new desperate fat girl I can fuck in there, is rofl fat yet?

FAT STEVEY
maybe ramen will be there dude

RUBY
I d-don't r-really like parties

FANFARE
at least it will give us some cute girls to talk to

RUBY
yeah, real girls! I'll be even more nervious!


Director's Commentary: "Debras's Dildos" used to be "Dilbert's Dildos" in a reference to a joke I made on ytmnsfw like 12 years ago when howard dean claimed he worked in a dildo factory, there were two other megathread projects I never got done that were going to make reference to this g1 and this is the first one to actually get finished so I just changed it to Debra in reference to Rootbeers (first) ex wife and how she no doubt needs dildos as rooties tiny 2 incher can't please her, also that's Big Dick Brutal Bonecrusher's dildo in the store's sign, "something unique" is a username reference, the Health and More Store is something Rootbeer and Debra (user DickWhisperer) ran IRL and he got into tax debt over, the Once Upon A Time In Pedowood poster were real posters someone put up over Hollywood to diss Jeffrey Epstain and all his Hollywood friends which was very based, the Obey poster is the avatar of user "That Guy" and the Listen And Believe poster is in reference to a speech Anita Sarkeesian gave, the pedestrian is ytmnd frontpager Darth Wang who is somehow still making sites, the quadbike is the one donated to the Ukranian military by streamer Destiny's community and they put his logo on it, hopefully it doesn't get used in a warcrime or something

INT. TINYCHAT.COM/ROFLBROTHEL - NIGHT

Akiraaaaaaa welcomes the Legendary FJS Crew with a song.


Director's Commentary: Akira made this based on a very wacky post about what an FJS movie would be like I posted on some version of FJS

FAT STEVEY
this stickam party sucks, I put on my make-up for nothing, where's duxx?

RUBY
yeah where the qt3.14s at?

FAT STEVEY
everyone keeps saying I have the biggest tits in here

RUBY
I'm gonna go watch petra make her cat dance due to anxiety

FAT STEVEY
abers tits are at least the same size as mine


Fag Finder: Nephilim, lethe, sigge, dood, timlololol, Tahiti Joe, Paula_, MorbidBlackBloodPuke, will-i-am, fjj, Devon, dascoot, popebeats, juxtapose
Director's Commentary: the extras used in this party scene were mostly from my "ytmnsfw no-namers" folder, it's funny, I've been putting these people as extras in my various projects for so long I get nostalgia looking at them even though I've never actually talked to most of them, when I decided fuck it yolo and to have all these images be 1920px wide I had to rescreencap and redo a lot of these images before about the half-way point since my 20 year old dumbass saved them minimized including some of my cutout heads of the main cast (thankfully most of them were already quite small since people are alergic to uploading hi rez images of themselves so how more shitty they looked by enlarging them again couldn't be helped, only the matthew fox pics and a few others were originally minimized and had to be redone really, if you didn't understand that then that's why I have a huge brain to make megathreads like this and you dont, to obsess over details no one on earth will ever ever notice even when I try to explain them, although I took the opertunity to add in some funnier new pics of Stevey) but fuck redoing the crowd scenes since some of these avatars are so obscure I can't even remember what users they are for to find them on my HD again, webcam screencaps referenced are Cberry, ViralPenguin and Barry showing their balls, a vid that Tek got Cag to make of her writing For You with her period blood that I made a webm of and posted on 4chan pretending it was me making a Baneposting reference and it harvests at least 20 (You)s each time and still gets reposted years later, jon showing some fanart of fanfare and Ted Stevens who were often shipped together to troll me, roflbrothel's IRL friend Caz making tit signs for people the same night she got drunk and fingered herself and then left the forum forever (let the record show I told her in PM to definately not do that because she'd regret it) and eljoe hacking it on that same night, also I vaugely remember playing TF2 with no-namer popebeats like literally 16 years ago

Ruby wanders through the crowd of faggots in the tinychat.

AKIRAAAAAAA
did you see my new youtube? I'm going to be uhhhhh how you say uhhhh professionnel comédien?
Director's Commentary: Akira and Camoron are both now professional comedians, ytmnsfw really was the funniest place online

VITAFIN
Yeah I listened to it. Great stuff. I think you should link it to Elezzzark.
Director's Commentary: joke here being Elezzzark is deaf

AKIRAAAAAAA
dude! caz is fingering herself on cam! brb

VITAFIN
Hey Ruby!

RUBY
oh hi will
Director's Commentary: The Room reference


Fag Finder: starguard, Coochie, waziot, Piratio, xfactor, Bitterbanana, AstaTheMasta, Big Solid Ass, Bang!, Asphyxia, anal blast, Warhol, females, btape, xXwaspXx, TEEN MAGAZINE X SPONSORED BY KLEENEX, slikkwon, TeenHunter, wyndi, AlexGuy10, chris hanson, Sarcasmic, Timothy J. Butts, surfnazi, jamlayfla, sspunkyali (those last two met up to fuck and posted their afterglow pic lol)
Director's Commentary: in the second version of the script vitafin was recast as general doli to make it more "modern" but it didn't really work since vitafin really was this type of guy who "knew everybody", he hasn't posted in half a decade anyway so fuck em, not that vitafin has posted in a decade himself, note I have Irn Bru in my cup, Akiraaaaaaa's dick in his hand was the same dick as my sword in my "300" battle gifs and the miller beer represents the user miller9163286, also a pic of cag flashing her tits blurry in the background

VITAFIN
What about this tinychat party huh? You seen any tits tonight?

RUBY
no I'm gay

VITAFIN
What do you mean you're gay? I distinctly remember you ejaculating over a collage of Haylie in early '06. You practically invented the cum tribute.
Director's Commentary: another thing that's not a joke, now adays this is it's own like porn subculture of guys jacking off on printed pictures lmao

RUBY
hey will you know everyone right?

VITAFIN
Yeah, pretty much, I do.


Director's Commentary: vitafins posting gimmick was having perfect grammar, I remember we had some weird friendly rivalry thing going on where I would tell him I was actually Matthew Fox and he would take it seriously that I was trying to pose as him and try to trip me up and after a year of this he finally got me on refering to A4 sized paper which is apparantly an EU thing and not a US thing that Matthew Fox would say so good job ya finally got me

RUBY
do you know this one girl with an avatar like this?

VITAFIN
Yes, that's Desolation AKA momthinksimcool AKA blenderkitty AKA a fuck lot of alts. Meant to be here tonight, not on cam for obv-
Director's Commentary: first hint that there's more to deso than first appears...

RUBY
what?! she's here?!

VITAFIN
Ruby, do you have the hots for her? I've got to tell you-


Director's Commentary: I was considering having the doodle Scott holds up be a miley cyrus cum sign but I went with posting this doodle of miley m0nde posted once like 13 years ago, another very cool forum reference not even the person it's in reference to will remember, in the background is one of Deso's alts Paula_ a parody of her other alt Paul_

Ruby ignores Vitafins in-coming wall of gossipy bullshit and heads out on the hunt for Deso, scanning the crowd of no-namers like some sort of robot programmed to post on forums or something stupid like that.



He sees Teknorat macin on a fat bitch.
Director's Commentary: I think something like 3 out of 5 of Tek's girlfriends have been obese girls he met online lis

TEKNORAT
and then she says "I'll fuck a dog for you!" as I'm shoving her out the door!
Director's Commentary: yet another story that's completely real, something one of Tek's ex's yelled at him as he was dumping her, what a Chad!

ROFLBROTHEL
did this girl also think she was a vampire by any chance?
Director's Commentary: in reference to a girl Camoron dated who both wanted to fuck dogs and like to pretend to be a vampire, both Tek and I's dream girl, loser normie Cam dumped her of course


Fag Finder: Cabbage Head, buttsecks, CrazyRay, bossnigger, deadmankiller, Honduran Honkey Sales, Chilean Chink Sales, Australian Abo Sales, Bobo Lustig, meatloaf, johnakin, jessica from second life
Director's Commentary: sorry to Gabi for the unflattering pic that I think was just her reacting to one of my many cringy comments, pic on the wall is the user johnakin's avatar, there's a screencap of Barry putting clothe pegs on his nipples, the Jessica Rabbit Second Life avatar represents a girl from second life stevey knew called Jessica I didn't have a screencap of, on her shoulder is the brand from the sex cult NXIVM, a combination of mastermind Keith Raniere and his top slave girl Allison Mack's initials, and yes that's the girl from Smallvile lmao, in reference to stevey's Second Life friends being involved in the Spirit Science cult

He walks past the tinychat group for old women who post on troll forums for some reason.

BEV.
have you seen my daughters boy donny? he buys heroin from lisa on this WW Web
Director's Commentary: Lisa's e-boyfrield Donny died, probably from heroin abuse, and his like 80 year old grandmother signed up to the forums to defend his good name and bitch at Lisa who she is now friends with, of course the mean forum trolls got her to read out a suicide note that was allegedly from Donny that blamed Lisa for fucking other men but it's so over the top surreal dramatic even I can't believe it's real and not something someone put up to her

TIER 4 SUBSCRIBER CERTIFIED LILY™
I did have a daughter that was murdered because she said no, Like I taught her to do
Director's Commentary: Lily is a weirdo like 65 year old woman on an oxygen tank who goes from forum to forum trying to buy them from it's owner so she can ban everyone who is mean to her, she destroyed some forum called ezmanga that used to be a big manga scan community and is now just her and her friend fellow boomer Dirty Harry, she's basically a forum serial killer and spends all day messaging me trying to buy my forum and Clay once pretened to be me to her for months on end to scam her out of $200, her daughter was killed by career criminal Howard York with a machete when she turned him down for sex... seriously (click HERE to read about it), she's also easy to troll with parody alts so she begs for increasingly over the top name changes to prove she's the original

NYEUSIGRUBE
you two are horrible mothers

*young child screaming hysterically in background the entire time*
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to a time I heard n-..n... whatever this womans unreadable username is on a webcam party drunk as fuck ignoring her crying baby and when I told Tek he brought it up to her years later and she denied it... then realized what it coulda been... then admitted it probably happened lmao, the first thing you need to know about FJS is... we have people everywhere, click HERE for a screencap of this event



CatPiss, i watch teens sleep on cam, sweet bee, KamSparce, alireeza, Bill., IMBrianFellows, dcent, Kathleen Blake, Pressure Negativity, nugget, princess, Shaun Phase
Director's Commentary: I added this scene in years later because the old grannies on the forum needed their own scene, sorry nyeusigrube for roping you in with two unironic 65+ year olds but you're a mom too and had no other characters left to use this dialog with, the radio represents user radi0volta a dude I know from way back from the IGN days literally two decades ago who I played DayZ a bit with, most of the other users here are from a cutout avatar heads folder called "discord dipshits" for users on the various discords I've had the displeasure of interacting with since the forum is now in the stage where the community has mostly moved to discord and they get a lot of random morons turning up to get trolled, I don't really like lurking in a chatroom all day but I'm happy I kept the community alive long enough for it to ascend into a new form so it can live on in the cloud like Heaven (or Hell since discord is full of pedophiles) although like every other community on the internet (other than rubynet using my patented "just stop partaking in the community yourself" admin style) no forum-related discord can keep itself together without undergoing an ownership dispute, admin tanty or splintering into different spin-offs that in turn fall apart due to drama so it's more like reincarnating as an insect with a short lifespan than any sort of afterlife (wrote that joke before adding discord user "sweet bee" lol, represented by the amazing Bee Movie), I asked Lisa who some discorders to include would be and she said "alireeza" who was an underage user Lily had cybersex with lol here represented by chess grandmaster Alireza Firouzja, someone called Shaun Phase here represented by a musician called Shawn Phase and someone she tried to recall as "pressure or positive negativity" here represented by a negative pressure guage, there's three other camera shots of Scott looking at crowds in the house party but I'm at the level of asking Lisa for half-recalled usernames so I think I'm officially out of no-namers to include

He sees the object, which is what all women are, of his obsession standing by herself watching the tinychat party drift by.


Fag Finder: Gleek, egocellure, Abetstogs Prime, Finalfight, Eli, corey, downsyndrome, Condescending Dogma, Random Consumer
Director's Commentary: to this day I'm not sure what Deso's real year of birth is because she changes her answer every few years, just like a real woman! also just to take this moment to say idk why Ramona is used as an example of a "Manic Pixie Dreal Girl" (a criticism the reviewer who coined it says he regretted because of how overused it became) with Zooey Deschanel from 500 Days of Summer, both of those characters are the opposite of the MPDG, Ramona is the stoic damaged one and Scotts the manic one that rushes to fix all her problems (murder her exes lol) to his own detriment and he has to fix himself to "get" her, not her fixing him, and Summer straight up tells the protag she doesn't want a relationship and the whole movie is him having to accept that, and another common example of the girl from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and I am pretty sure the point of that movie is the characters relationship went bad and they're trying to forget each other

This cup is a metaphor for his hog, which he is squeezing in real life to Deso.
Director's Commentary: this line is in reference to a twitch meme that started on one of Destiny's many ex gfs stream where she was doing yoga and a coomer in the chat said "I'm squeezing my hog to this and if you ban me I won't stop" or something like that, cue memes of people squeezing pigs


Fag Finder: Mr-Cheater, Muhammed Olie, neckbeard, NSFWeljoe
Director's Commentary: couldn't add my nails to this gif since when I try to open it photoshop says "Could not complete your request because of a program error." and I didn't save the original .psd file damn computers are cool, NSFWeljoe has always been a frequent poster even recently and his only apperance ITT is the lower jaw of his avatar in this gif lol, oh well, I think he appears elsewhere in collages on the walls and such, also Mr-Cheater I think literally had a disabled level IQ and once jacked off on the ytmnd vent without realizing he hadn't hung up

RUBY
give me your address so I can come to your house and rape and kill you
Director's Commentary: this really is the first thing I ever said to Deso, although the context was m0nde and I were playing a L4D game where we were trying to do a glitch where we slooowly threw a propane tank into a wooden box over and over again to get it up to a sewer pipe to be able to jump into it to do a glitch and get unfairly long time on some zombie hoard endurance mode since if you just meele whacked the box it would break and Deso joins, after having actually being the one stalking me for a while, and immediately meele'd and broke the box that we'd spent half an hour trying to get into position and I said that line to her, pretty Chad if I do say so myself but can't beat Cag saying "I'm literally an unemployed sex worker" to her future husband Jon in DayZ as their first ever communication (actually I just found that I literally was recording this game session where I first met Deso in '09: click HERE to view it god bless the awful audio and video quality FRAPS used to record)



DESOLATION
Excuse me?

RUBY
that was my best pick-up line, I'm a PUA
Director's Commentary: PUA stands for Pick-Up Artist, a cringe manosphere subculture that died when tindr came out and men realized there's no skill to getting sex rather outside of asking as many women as you can until one finally says yes

DESOLATION
You're going to pee me a... what?
Director's Commentary: joke here is she heard PUA as "pee you a", very original joke I came up with for this thread, no one steal it

RUBY
you uh you know LOST?

DESOLATION
I know of Lost.


Director's Commentary: the weird light switch at the top of the wall there is meant to be the start broadcasting button on tinychat people appearing in these webcam screencaps are Lisa showing off the skills she learned in the circus (not a joke), StompleB wearing a turban, Barry in his tiger furry suit, Jon trying to get some muscle on his toothpick arms, Stevey showing off his artwork of m0nde, Cberry showing how black people eat liquorice, Elz threatening to flash his dick, Pissjugs as a vampire, ROY4L in his Yale laboratory (where he once told me he was just a janitor who snuck in to look at his sperm under the microscope), Rootbeer wearing his mosquito mask, Gabi licking her feet for me (GigaChad), Juji showing off his Disney princess mouse, the 50something Mrs. Hyde showing her clevage, Teknorat showing his BJ skills, m0nde and Roflbrothel showing their gollywogs, Petra showing her shotgun as she gets ready to fight the Matrix, Cag making a breast sign for me, Vaginal Blood Fart showing her meds, Terror Baby flipping us off, Aber showing her dog Popeye on the day he had to go to court for biting someone and the asian cop was from a time this kid was downing pills and threatening to kill himself on webcam and everyone was rushing to doxx him to call the cops on him and eventually this officer turned up to take him to the hospital and he leaned down and actually laughed that this kid was killing himself live on the internet as the chat exploded with people saying all cops must die ect, just another day on the 00s internet homie, also note the big black dildo between the two black balloons as if they were it's balls, BBC kino

RUBY
so uh I hate jews because people think it's purgatory and jews did it like 9/11 lol because they put in the plane crash in the final episode like they did into the twin towers hah like 9/11 I mean the executives at ABC not JJ abrams well he didn't really do much other than direct the pilot... on 9/11 to go into the twin towers! no on the show it was mostly carlton cues and damon lindeloff I mean more like Jew Jew Abrams right uh but he actually designed the logo on his laptop like an hour before it first aired and he also made Fringe which was ok but like that did actually have an alternate reality and like this aint Fringe right?


Director's Commentary: I think it actually takes a lot of skill to accuratelly write the kind of word salad that comes out when you try to tell an anecdote while nervous

DESOLATION
Yeah, Fringe actually answers its mysteries.


Director's Commentary: I actually wouldn't know since I got bored of the show like mid season 3 kek

RUBY
um............. am I being trolled?

Desolation stares perplexed at Ruby as he sperges out.

RUBY
...I'll leave you forever alone now

DESOLATION
Thanks.






Fag Finder: mom, gripes, PROFESSIONAL WHITE SUPREMACIST, Moon Griffon, heineken_skywalker, Gohan
Director's Commentary: I originally made the joke of me intimitely hiding behind homosexual artfag crew member "mom" in 2010 and since he's since fucking died in real life I thought it might be a bit tasteless to have him be remembered as a gay joke but you know what this is probably how he would wanted it, I'll always remember how he literally photographed creepy-chan irl and gave me some ultra rare mega exlcusive pix of her, rest in peace brother, also the webcam pic was for 99% of this threads production Caz fingering herself but then I realized its probably literally cp lol so replaced it with the much more wholesom koryoko getting aftershave and a snake put on him when he fell asleep on webcam at fyrestorms house


Fag Finder: 666PIMP420666, AkmaaudNajida, Al Borland, Apprica, Archbishop Travis, sex with dead people
Director's Commentary: screencaps here are a photoshoped screencap of the girl internutt pretends to be posing with a pic of Summer Glau (Trollinator) from Firefly, Gunndar dressing up in a weird get-up for iwascruel (note the "centepedes? in my vagina?" meme I put int he ad under it) and Barry doing autoerotic asphyxiation on cam, displayed on a Tegra Note, something Stevey boasted about owning


Fag Finder: Carl Johnson, Charley Blacks, general arkady grigorovich ourumov, blawq0lph, Chainsaw Masturbation
Director's Commentary: screencaps are of Bliz jacking his surpisingly small penis to Caz just before his mum walked in on him lmao, now compeltely psychotic Ewok jacking off for ALOL town bike CtrlAltKick while she was underage I am p sure and a girl Deso aka Village got naked on webcam


Fag Finder: brave92, buttcarpet, root ghost, Bubb Rubb, crackhead_willy, fuckingchair, Kensington, eNgLiShChAp, canker

RUBY
mate!

FAT STEVEY
what?

RUBY
she's totally real!

FAT STEVEY
who?

RUBY
Desolation AKA a bunch of people

FAT STEVEY
does she have a dick?


Fag Finder: Derp, Claire Delet, notyou, dardholio, curious groge, CrushedCroutons
Director's Commentary: wish I had put CrushedCroutons's avatar that's a plate of food on some table somewhere but I'm too lazy to change it now, screencap super blurry in the background is Fyrestorm, known for having a duo-tone cock from his circumcision... Americans!

RUBY
mate! what do you know about Desolation?!

VITAFIN
Woah! All I'll tell you is she's American.

RUBY
american... god bless america... fuck every other country on earth... I want a concealed carry licence and 5 burgers a day and to clap at the movies and planes landing and waitresses dropping plates

VITAFIN
Why don't you go talk to Millie and Caz? They know a lot more tha-


Fag Finder: DJAddiction, douchecanoe
Director's Commentary: the avi in the party hat is actually user "BossNigger" who's alien avi already appeared in this scene but I used to use this one in a lot of gifs so used it for old times sake, "not penny's boat" on vitafins hand here is a reference to him being cast as Charlie in THIS gif from 2007 from the season 3 finale of LOST

RUBY
yo sluts! what do you know about desolation?!

MILLIE
I heard shes had loads of internet boyfriends on ALOL

CAZ
i heard its her birthday soon maybe she'll get drunk and finger herself on cam or something embarassing
Director's Commentary: reference to Caz doing this very thing

RUBY
haha yeah yeah WHAT ELSE?


Fag Finder: God's Word, growers, Dragon Slayer, funbagz, doro pesch, G0dzuki, dzk, FatController, English-Cunt
Director's Commentary: in the second version of the script the girl on the right was Mrs. Hyde talking about her daughter being a slut, but she already got her one piece of characterization anyone knows her for in the Breaking Bad thread out the way so nothing lost here and I wanted to include the naughty eyebrow gif Vitafin made for Caz somewhere, and Obnoxious Bitch was the girl on the left but I spotted a good opening for a joke about Millie's terrible Yoshi tattoo on her arm

HOWARD DEAN
i did a podcast with her once and ooh boy lemme tell ya that hellcat has one sexyvoice all husky n shit it makes me go RAAAAAAAAGH lol get it dont tell her but sometimes i listen to it and bash my bish-


Fag Finder: hendrix, Bushpig Bill, GodBlessTheUSA, TOPROBAR, Halo Master
Director's Commentary: in the first script this was actually one of teknorat's exes who never even posted on the forum but she literally begged me not to be included so I changed her in the second modern lizardized script this was Rose West but Howard eventually won the role making reference to THIS commentary track the three of us made, easter egg in the background of Deso alt Fear&Loathing who's only gimmick was mentioning constantly spilling things and she does this three times throughout this thread, rule of three baby! also the avi of The Dude is user Cabbage Head who's avi from Super Troopers (i think?) already appeared in this sequence but I used to use his Dude avi a lot so included it for old times sake

SIBURKE939
that there is one feisty gal, the kind of woman who can take care of herself when the rape hits the fan, shes probably into pegging like the missus, let me know if shes into scat too alright mate, maybe get her to poop on cam for me eh, I'd pay at least 3 limited edition 1st gen transormers figures to see that


Fag Finder: jlen503, iwascruel's pubic waxing kit, jizzrag, Holt-Oram Syndrome
Director's Commentary: Siburke was into scat and used to ask forum girls to "poop on cam", he became a fan of Transformers because he was getting into too many street fights after getting out the british army and eventually someone smashed him in the head with a metal grate so he decided he needed a hobby to get him off the streets and he choose collecting Transformers toys and it worked and now he's happily married

FRAUCHEN
I heard she's a music elitist she only listens to classic rock and she doesnt even like ramstein I mean wtf


Fag Finder: Kill Cake 2006, LawnBlowerMan, JC Motors, Mozart
Director's Commentary: in the second version of the script this was Obnoxious Bitch but lost out to Frauchen aka Chibbi American eventually for her love of Ramstein, great band!

GENERAL DOLI
oh yes buddy, m8, m8y boi, deso is definaktly a very sexy hot babe, she literally has a vagina and boys sex with it, and you are definately in no way at all a pants shitting aspie worse poster ever who makes hiorrendous fucking gay shit terrible threads out of the worst movie ever made for hipster retards and gives the best poster one line, you are actually very cool, you are, how should we say, a True Sir ;) lmao and desolation, who is, a girl, will literallty want to have sex with you in real life and you will be her husband, this will hapen [said with irony] {said with another layter of irony}]


Fag Finder: refugee #54673
Director's Commentary: I miss General Doli, he used to be such a bad poster and he actually asked me to help him workshop new gimmick ideas and he went through pretending to be the pope to being a news reader who reads the daily news and ended up just copying Drunkpuppies posting style wholesale and it worked amazingly well but he left the forums to become a normie before he ever saw me casting him as Jesse in my Breaking Bad thread (click HERE to read it), apparantly he ended up not liking me, probably just mad I pumped and dumped his steampunk Nancy Drew avatar in Second Life, in the second version of the script this dude was CheYeah but I found his line too funny I had to crowbar his apperance in after this, note the kino of the catfish avatar for "refugee #54673" (who I think was literally deso lol) being in the background as doli implies a catfishing situation

CHEYEAH
yo broseph i would totally tap dat shit mang that bitch is so fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine son i would fuck her so hard dude id slam her like it was lacrosse her pussy would look like shawarma my d-


Director's Commentary: this extra woman talking is from an extended edit on the DVD, CheYeah was another poster who like looked up to me as a posting mentor even though he was this like Lacrosse playing dudebro Chad lmao

ROFLBROTHEL
what about desolation?!

RUBY
you know her?! tell me now!

ROFLBROTHEL
she just registered her like billionth alt here, she likes pink floyd, she always posts in my music threads

RUBY
pink floyd? is that some guys nickname for his boabie?


Fag Finder: mnkylzard, noccguy, lee-, kkkhronic munchies, kayo dot, Leper Spray

TEKNORAT
so you do realize that even if you do get her to like you she's not going to fall in love with you over the internet, she's probably going to turn out to be an 80 year old black man anyway and you're never going to meet in real life and its the internet so you're probably going to get trolled by her either way so the best you can hope for here is a fake fake fake fake friendship right? I say friendship because no matter what level of deception you're on you'll still be stuck in the friendzone forever fucking frankly


Fag Finder: Radnnug, Rey Mysterio Jr., Phon Delmajunk, niggaz is mad, patricia alright, tmac, Troy McClure

RUBY
you think we could be friends?

TEKNORAT
yeah sure knock yourself out mate I just expelled all my care right there

so anyway marnie you getting the girls out or what?

ROFLBROTHEL
only if you get yer bum out

RUBY
I don't know what it is about that girl but I'd totally show her m-


Fag Finder: Llamaguy, lucid, nathan, Michael Stivic, Nazi, NetFlame, the contender

ROFLBROTHEL
RUBY! I FORBID YOU FROM HITTING ON DESO! even if you havnt had a real girlfriend in ur entire life



TEKNORAT
hey now there ruby could get laid whenever he wants

actually probably not now that he has an imaginary robot girlfriend I mean jesus christ

ROFLBROTHEL
an imaginary robot gf? vigin4lyf alert

TEKNORAT
and don't forget not having left his house in over a decade

RUBY
hey I didn't choose the NEET life the NEET life chose me, or no, it's the other way around, I'm not a loser I swear

ROFLBROTHEL
i dont want you scaring off the coolest girl on the forums we all know youre a freak weirdo stalker pervo man-child creep

RUBY
that's completely untrue

ROFLBROTHEL
that time you put your own blood and cum on some macaroni and cheese and ate it in a thread about creepy-chan?

RUBY
she actually told fanfare on facebook she thought it was glorious and called me a precious angel
Director's Commentary: click HERE for proof


Fag Finder: kacen, patheon

TEKNORAT
gloriously mentally unwell maybe

ROFLBROTHEL
that time with duxx?

RUBY
she was the one who brought up piss play with me!
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to stevey being a weirdo and keeping talking about drinking duxx's piss and yes I may have played along but it was mostly his fault

TEKNORAT
asking for it

ROFLBROTHEL
that time you posted cags menstral blood sign on 4chan? that time you edited pics of foxxi where she's being tortured? that time you recorded me taking vitafins virginity and made three drum and bass songs out of my moaning?
Director's Commentary: again, all true, first was tek's lizard whispering and I just posted it

TEKNORAT
all sound funny to me

ROFLBROTHEL
that time you made fanfare the ugliest bitchiest moonfaced redhead ever in this shitty thread?


Fag Finder: white people, Veronaspf, Sixers

RUBY
hey I'm sure fanfare is fine with her role in this thread...


Fag Finder: LOLsharks

ROFLBROTHEL
whatever, deso is out of your league lets just leave it at that... besides I dont think shes even free she kept mentioning some guy called re-

RUBY
yeah I dont know what it is about that girl she gives me a bo-

ROFLBROTHEL
FORGET IT RUBY!!!

Tinychat crashes and goes offline because it's a shitty broken website made by a slumlord jew.
Director's Commentary: reference to how Dan, a friend of streamer Destiny, actually founded tinychat


Fag Finder: wecallourselvesQ

Director's Commentary: this is where I stopped working on this thread in 2010 and decided to just produce the 10 songs I released for deso's birthday that will all be featured in this thread instead

INT. THE GAY TANK - NIGHT

Barry barges his way into the gay tank, waking up Ruby.

BARRY
ITS BARRY TIME!!!

RUBY
NO, BARRY! NO!


Director's Commentary: ah here's another instance of dialog on the gif since it was just too hard to avoid parodying that "it's X time!" meme with the guy barging into the room with the screaming kid for me to repost elsewhere

BARRY
d/w already fucked enough guys tonight

Barry flicks a used condom, covered on the outside with gay poop and filled with hiv+ jizz, at Ruby's face and collapses beside him.



RUBY
so that girl from my wet dream?

BARRY
girl... not interested

RUBY
I saw her on wikipedia

BARRY
wikipedia... I wrote most of the anilingus article

RUBY
and I'm at this tinychat party and hey there she is

BARRY
any guys get their cocks out?

RUBY
I think shes...

BARRY
a shitty poster like you?

RUBY
I think shes the girl of my wet dreams



BARRY
then you should drop your stupid robot girlfriend gimmick

RUBY
I've never been so sure about something

BARRY
then you should drop your stupid robot girlfriend gimmick

RUBY
what was that?

BARRY
then you should.... drop your.... stupid... roboooo-...
(Barry falls asleep mid-sentence, since talking to Ruby is so boring.)



Ruby gets an incoming Skype call.

RUBY'S SISTER
yiz ganae lumber tay lassies ya wido chancer?
Translation: You're going to date two girls you arrogant risk taker?



RUBY
not even!

RUBY'S SISTER
yiz shultay drap yur oult wan ya spoon
Translation: You should drop your old one you fool.

RUBY
wait who told you?

RUBY'S SISTER
tha wee jakie napper fannybaws dunro
Translation: That little drunken head vagina testicles Dunro.

RUBY
he's not even online

RUBY'S SISTER
yiz shult tae ken af aul a gemmies hoo et cin go yer dinger tay gies ae dingy ya eeejit
Translation: You should know of all the guys how it can anger to get ingored you idiot.

RUBY
shouldnt you be sucking off luis lopez?
Director's Commentary: reference to an in-joke me and Tek had where Luis Lopez from GTAVI had a girlfriend that looked like my sister

RUBY'S SISTER
och aye hod on all shuldtay tossa faccy shouty tay alla yer troops
Translation: Oh yeah hold on I should throw a facebook shout out to all of your friends.



Ruby looks over to see that Barry had been tweeting in his sleep.

RUBY
fucking bogan faggot, I should message his sister and make her get rid of his chickens he named after gush
Director's Commentary: something half the forum did to Barry



JUMP CUT TO: The next morning.

RUBY
BARRY!!! stop having sex dreams about muscular kangaroos and wake up!


Director's Commentary: the gay anal interracial on Barry's phone is from the "snake" smiley that's been on the forums for years

RUBY
two questions

first: should I include users from the original ytmnd forums in this thread I'm making? I didn't save any of their avatars but I found these screencaps I made that's like a guide on where to post on that forum and maybe I could pick an avatar for them based on their usernames in these screenshots or something
Director's Commentary: this is just a little meta joke of a real thing I decided to do and to take the piss out of myself for it, you can see the ancient screencap on my monitor there when I made a guide in like 2005 on how to use the forums for frontpagers (click HERE to view it)

BARRY
what kinda sad case drongo would even think about people who stopped posting years ago on a different forum that's been replaced he never even talked to once? get help mate

next question

RUBY
what's a good pink floyd song?

BARRY
what do you call it? the wall?
Director's Commentary: "what do you call it?" is one of Barry's many verbal ticks

RUBY
google says its an album should I make a thread about the whole thing? I gotta make a really good thread... ok heres an idea: Ruby Calaber's The Wall (of Text), funny right?

BARRY
as a stingray attack
Director's Commentary: reference to Australian national hero Steve Irwin's tragic death, RIP


Director's Commentary: on the shelf under the TV are DVD cases in reference to media I've consumed in relation to the forums released after 2010 that would be a bit too anachronistic to be referenced with posters on walls, on the top shelf: media I've done commentaries on with Deso: Filth, Community (season 3 finale, also with Camoron), Cheap Thrills, Cabin in the Woods (with Gabi), four movies related to my megathreading: Dredd, which I have some fun ideas for making a megathread of similar to this one about if I ever get the motivation, Resident Evil: Retribution which I really liked the setting of and had plans to use it in some autistic forum fanfiction idea I had of posters put into a battle royale style situation but these ideas were superseded by the battle royale generator website becoming a big meme I just used instead of any sort of long form narrative which saved me a shit load of time, Inception that me and Teknorat both enjoyed and inspired me to take up lucid dreaming, The Neon Demon I wrote a megathread review of and Alex Cross, a movie where Matthew Fox, my avatar character guy, plays a fantastic bad guy, and I considered making a parody megathread like this one about but couldn't really get a funny story out of it as it's a pretty standard generic detective thriller, I'll probably use clips from it in something eventually, and more movies I've made commentaries for with Deso: It Follows, Knights of Badassdom (an unreleased commentary for a god awful Summer Glau movie Teknorat and I made), Maniac, The Purge: Anarchy, The Purge: Election Year, Suicide Squad, The Guest, The Shallows, The VVitch, Under The Skin, You're Next, on the shelf under it are video games I've uploaded videos of to my youtube channel: Ark: Survival Evolved, ARMA 3, Borderlands 2, a Call of Duty: Black Ops, Contagion which doesn't have a physical release so I just used the (now widely viewed due to covid-19 lol) movie cover, Counter-Strike: Go, Planet Side 2, Battleborn, Far Cry 3 (with the 3 changed to blue in reference to when I played this with Camoron and my game glitched out to have a blue tint to it), The Forest, The Division, Rust, Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six: The Siege, Killing Floor - Overwatch, H2O (using the case for a movie of the same title), H1Z1, Grand Theft Auto V, The Culling, Player Unknown's Battlegrounds, Dying Light and Dead Island: Riptide, on the shelf under that is games I recorded while playing with other posters but never got around to upload: Doom (2016), Battlefield Hardline, Resident Evil VII, Far Cry 4, Far Cry 5, Dark Souls III an autism game I would never play bit watched Deso play on skype once, Batman: Arkham Origins, Dead By Daylight, Evolve, Metal Gear Rising: Revengance which I just adore and havn't actually played with anyone else but it needs a shout-out, Hitman: Absolution, Hitman, Hitman 2, Homefront 2, Life is Strange, Max Payne 3, Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain, Payday 2, Saints Row: The Third, Saints Row IV, Team Fortress 2, Warframe, Zombie Army Trilogy and prominently seen is the case for Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns Of The Patriots which I half-wrote a megathread review of in 2008 and only managed to post in 2015, a penis pump in reference to Barry unironically using one which might explain why his dick curves to the side, and now on the other side we begin movies released after 2010 that Deso and I have watched together: Blue Jasmine, The Brothers Grimsby, Battle Of The Sexes, Bad Samaritan, Assassination Nation, Amanda Knox, Crawl, 50 Shades Darker, 10 Cloverfield Lane, Cyberbu//y, on the shelf under that more movies I've watched with Deso: Tiger King, American Horror Story: Cult, Blood Drive, Braindead, Fargo, GLOW, Gypsy, Legion, Planet Earth II, Supergirl (which I made SJWs destroyed compilations of that have gotten literally 1.5 million views, pewdiepie reacting to them with over 8 MILLION VIEWS and articles written about them by right wing media outlets which killed my desire to make youtube videos because having so many people watching my shit makes me uncomfortable lmao, inb4 this thread goes ultra viral and like Edgar Wright retweets it and the cast and crew of the movie end up doing a dramatic reading of it at the 20th aniversary Zoom meet-up), The Deuce, True Detective, Westworld - Twin Peaks, Bad Grampa, Evil Dead, Faults, Frozen (the cartoon), Get Out, Glass, Horse Girl, Hounds Of Love, I Am Not A Serial Killer, Imperium, Ingrid Goes West, It, Jigsaw, Joshy, Cobain, Montage Of Heck, Mandy and on the bottom shelf more movies I've watched with Deso: Movie 43, Mr. Right, Mike And Dave Need Wedding Dates, Nerve, Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping, Noah, Nymphomaniac Vol 1., Nymphomaniac Vol 2., Palo Alto, Pet, Raw, Scre4m, Smashed, Survivor, The Assignment, The Babysitter, The Big Short, The Hunt, The Imitation Game, The Infiltrator, The Little Hours, The Nice Guys, The Snowman, The Canyons, Westworld, Wish Upon, Zombieland: Double Tap, Zoolander No. 2, of course the LOST DVDs I have in real life, the House M.D. DVDs I have in real life in reference to my Doctor House gimmick and a Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles DVD in reference to where Trollinator is from, a few of these cases are anachronistic PS4 game cases and fictional steam-game cases that weirdos make on the steam forums since other physical copies don't exist, on the TV is a screencap of America's Next Top Model which Creepy-Chan was on I wrote review threads of, the American Psycho Elezzzark poster was made by Camoron, the other two were made by me in refernce to him threatening to go on a rampage against Gush and then some weird turn of phrase where he told user Milky that "a bottle is not enough" while threatening to attack him with it or something, Mexico aint sending their best, and the pink hot pants are in reference to Barry dancing around in them for Gush

An annoying MSN alert message pops up telling Ruby he has a new email from braceslover72@gmail.com.

RUBY
dude I just got a message from some fake looking email I bet its some chainmail spammy bullshit

BARRY
if its that nigerian prince whos dad just died help him out and give him your cc info

RUBY
I'm hoping for one of those stories where you have to send it to 10 other people or a emo girl's ghost will appear by your bedside and kill you because that would be pretty hot I'd cover that bitch in ectoplasm if you know what I mean

BARRY
hope you download a megavirus

RUBY
"dear mr. calaber next time ur bitch ass is on forums let me know and ill curb stomp ur autistic ass blah blah blah blah troll to troll blah blah blah blah blah blah 7 evil blah blah blah"


Director's Commentary: new poster on the wall is from one of my avatars from when I released my remix of Taylor Swift's Wildest Dreams music video to add the Africans back in after people complained there weren't any in her music video (click HERE to view it) also note the Oceanic Airlines logo from LOST on the plane

RUBY
this is...


Director's Commentary: originally this email was going to be sent by reno which is why it's more kinda his way of writing a troll message than m0nde's, but it works better if it's from m0nde for dialog later and I'm too lazy to change it

RUBY
this is...



RUBY
this is...



BARRY
what?!

RUBY
TL;DR! this guys such a fag... deleeeete

back to trying to get cberry to fuck fanfare in the sims


Director's Commentary: the screencap previously was actually of fanfare and cberry created within the Sims by I thiiiink Camoron who made a bunch of posters, Barry is doing jenkem in the background, there's also a poster parody that says "Horrible Admins 2" made by Camoron too but it's clearly about me and clay being admins of rubynet so I made it this super blurry image (click HERE to view it)

BARRY
ruby... are you waiting for replies to the pink floyd thread you just posted?

RUBY
maybe...


Director's Commentary: my second Home Alone parody avatar on the wall there

BARRY
it's the weekend everyones out getting smashed you wont get any replies until monday at the earliest

Ruby gets a reply to his thread.

RUBY
you were saying?



The reply is from trollinator.

TROLLINATOR
I read your thread in 0.316 seconds! That is 0.007 seconds faster than my CPU's average reading time. Was that an effective compliment?



TROLLINATOR
What is "Pink Floyd"? In the future the machines engineer a chemical weapon that when inhaled by humans causes them to become uncontrollably attracted to members of their own sex. Tens of thousands of soldiers will be massacred while engaging in gay group sex orgies. It was named by the resistance as "the pink flood" because the victim's blood would be turned pink by the weapon.

RUBY
what the fuck? thats horrible

TROLLINATOR
Is Pink Floyd a prototype version of this weapon? Has Barry been exposed to it?

RUBY
no hes more into nu metal I think


Director's Commentary: the chemical weapon Trollinator describes here was actually a real U.S. military project lmao, click HERE to read about it

INT. LIMEWIRE - DAY

Ruby is pirating this song.



TROLLINATOR
Why do humans refer to this singer as Lady Gaga when he is a pre-op transsexual? The correct terminology would be Lord Gaga.

RUBY
you have to unpack your privilage bags or something to understand

Director's Commentary: additional song covers referenced here are mine for "One Bad Gnome" and "Left U 4 Dead", this exchange above is referencing the ancient 00s meme where Lady Gaga kept being photoghraphed with a big buldge in her pants, couldn't make a meme like that in [the current year], pretty unfunny lines tbh but let's just pretend that's on purpose to show me getting tired of Trollinator as my gimmick (this retroactively looped back around to funny upon discovering cringe twitch streamer Hasan "Hamas, stick settler babies on a Pike" Piker's old frat bro video joking about how gross it would be if Lady Gaga had a penis)


Fag Finder: Ando_2006 thanks for putting me onto ellybabe bro

INT. THE GOODONE STORE - DAY

TROLLINATOR
So I lifted him into the air by his throat and told him if he ever disliked one of your videos again I would clean his cock.

RUBY
uh I think you mean "clean his clock", I hope


Director's Commentary: the purple leather jacket Trollinator is holding in reference to one of the best T:SCC episodes where the Connor household is burgled so she tracks down and executes the robbers making sure to get her favorite purple leather jacket back, the pink boots on the shelf are (I think, I have folders going back 15 years with images to use in megathreads that I have forgotten why I even put them there tbh) from a fanfare YTMND, the meme DVD's are some bootleg version of Drive making it seem like an action movie (fun fact: an american woman actually sued a cinema because she paid for Drive and expected a movie like Fast & Furious), a real b-movie called Honkey Holocaust, a meme gay porno, the amazing real "documentary" Buck Breaking from unhinged black nationalist Tariq Nashid, an Chris-Chan parody of MGSV that I edited to be a PS3 game instead of PS4 since the blue PS4 boxes stick out to me as super anachronistic even though MGSV obviously is too, and a real b-movie called Dickshark, the brown coat represents the user BrowncoatAaron, the pictures on the wall are of CheYeah meeting Joe Rogan (look how small Joe is oh no no nonono) and Timlolololol meeting Tom Cruise (look how small Tim compared to already manlet Tom is oh no nononono) and I originally put up a pic of Garfield meeting Ron Jeremy but I realized I'd included that in a gif later on so I included an avatar of mine where I put Matthew Fox over this nerdy guy with a fucking swastika on his shirt that Taylor Swift posed with at a party (and to make matters worse she had JH on her blouse which can stand for "Jew Hater", uhh hello? based department?) and a screencap from an ANTM episode where Allison Harvard aka Creepy Chan met The Game and they got on super well as they've both lost family members and feel like outsiders in their industry, it was super cute, one of the framed photos is of the lynching of Thomas Shipp and Abram Smith with Ted Stevens and Cberry shooped over them ummm blame White Bear on that it wasn't me ok, there's a framed photo of Pastor Travis's avatar that he framed and put up on a wall he called his "achievement wall" along with articles he wrote in his local newspaper and such, there's a promo pic for one of my LOST threads of Max Goldberg finding one of my megathreads click HERE to view it, a sign iwascruel made for StompleB of a dead mouse, some bizzare meme image I made about m0nde and StompleB in-jokes featuring the cloverfield monster and sacred ear rats where uhhh maybe it's better if you just click HERE to view it rather than try to decribe it, and a meme I think Drunkpuppies made making fun of Plug Drugs supposed "dangerous thinking" rants, the "do not sit" sign on the couch Scott is sitting on is a great sight gag already but of course I had to spice it up myself

EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS - DAY

TROLLINATOR
Why did Seung-Hui Cho only kill 32 humans and injure 17 others? Given the same weapons, location and time-frame as he had I could have terminated approximately 8,108 humans.
Director's Commentary: this dialog is in reference to a tweet I made when twitter first came out in like 2009 in-character as Trollinator making this sort of comment about English spree-shooter Derrick Bird (but you only get mass shootings in america!!!! - t. libtards), thank god I got bored after like 1 week of tweeting since twitter is a mental illness simulator that'll get you arrested for saying that sort of joke now adays, 8108 are a LOST number (8) and the sum of the LOST numbers (108) of course

RUBY
thats nice dear


Fag Finder: lyleanimelord69, SpamHaterTom1, cool_guy, John Melendez, Literary Critic (who has the sign above his head edited to read BOOKS R GAY which I actually only just realized has a connection to this user's name let's pretend I did that on purpose as a super sutle joke), me, Yusuf
Director's Commentary: the immense references to users here are Teh_Giant_Squid is flying over the city, artfag Ryder Ripps is seen leaning against the Twin Towers which he made out of photos of something pretentious I'm sure for an art exibition (I actually only just recently saw his name being posted in twitter screencaps of lefty podcast host idiots who somehow got it into their head that he redesigned the CIA logo lmao, apparantly he has done design work for Grimes, M.I.A., Pusher T, Kanye and is dating fucking Azealia Banks though, very funny this guy used to be a ytmnder, hopefully he really is deep under cover in the CIA to leak more documents to prove jews did 9/11 after seeing my ytmnd), users Bupo, ShItPoStLINEHERECoMeTh (who's avatar makes the storefront read "come shit post" lul), WickedKewl420, Troll Kingdom Envoy, compass HR, assek all appear as storefront signs, daisy east's avatar is the flying cock, the green tick on the traffic light is the user Fooop_'s avatar, two Troll Squad fan characters Child Of Dutch Prostitute, made by m0nde mocking one of Elz insults for Gush, and Heidi Hot Bitch, Elz mocking Gush, are combined into one sex worker in a window like you get in degen EU countries (over it is a sign from "Ruby's Bar & Grill" in Coney Island NYC I saw in an episode of the fantastic Mr. Robot), the various pedestrians are lyleanimelord69, SpamHaterTom1, cool_guy, John Melendez and Literary Critic (who has the sign above his head edited to read BOOKS R GAY which I actually only just realized has a connection to this user's name let's pretend I did that on purpose as a super sutle joke) with "me" and Yusuf inside the store, on the lampost next to Trollinator is the avatars of sukkmyryk, EpicZero, Lone Ranger and durf there are various street signs for sdj, Lisa's Support Unit, Bhauk87, matixx and newer130's avatars Sherman's Children is the starving child in the diner next to a kackerot and kackerots cancer child, hope they've both recovered from their cancer by now, and that logo for some delivery company called DFW eats is the closest thing I could find to the gibberish that is the username "sdfawetas", the easter eggs are Trollinator holding a shotgun, the bottle Scott is holding is already orange so I put an Irn Bru bottle cap on it, a styalized logo for the meme magic god Kek, a logo saying "burger keng" that m0nde made making fun of my accent, a billboard that says "and the oscar for biggest pedophile goes to..." that was put up around Hollywood by someone very based, an anti-capitilist wall mural from London depicting evil billionares exploiting the global working class that jewish groups hilarously saw themselves in and accused it of anti-semitism and Labor party leader Jeremy Corbyn got into trouble for disagreeing (click HERE to read about it), an anachronistic racist menu parody that was doing the rounds in the MAGA community click HERE to read it, a real billboard for two seperate companies that reads "giant dicks" and the sign reading 11'-7" is in reference to this low hanging bridge in North Carolina that notoriously scrapes the top off trucks that drive under it that StompleB sends me videos of since he's an autist (click HERE to read about it), an anachronistic George Floyd reference from a real right wing restaraunt's menu, a real kids assault rifle called the JR-15 and the "for those who like to eat shit" sign is from Matrix Resurrections as I think a hint from Lana Wachowski that she felt forced to make that subpar movie

INT. FJS'S FORUM ARCADE - DAY

Ruby and Trollinator are playing that stupid ninja flash game again. It's score has already been playing.

TROLLINATOR
I have noticed blood on your used toilet paper when you forget to flush the toilet, is that from your feces? Do you need me to give you a rectal exam to check for colon cancer?

RUBY
it's just an anal fissure

Ruby is hardly paying attention (like anyone is to this thread). Trollinator is terminating her targets as precisely and efficiently as usual.


Fag Finder: DaChazman, Hank Hill, George McFly, hopjack, Federal_McSpooky, "I shit my pants" who appears for like literally three pixels walking around the corner outside for like 2 frames

TROLLINATOR
How did you acquire this injury?

RUBY
dont want to talk about it
Director's Commentary: I really do have an anal fissure, joke here is I got it from Juliet pegging me, when in reality i got it 4rm ur mum m8

TROLLINATOR
Pull down your pants. I need to perform medical triage.

RUBY
it's fine



RUBY
sorry I'm a casual gamer today

TROLLINATOR
Do not feel bad. It is difficult for most humans to enter a "flow state" consistently without the use of performance enhancing drugs. Would you like me to order you some off of the Dark Web?

RUBY
there's a joke in there about like a heavy flow period or something but I'm not finding it


Director's Commentary: easter eggs here are posters for games I've played with other posters, all anachronistic but obscure enough that no one will recognize them lol, Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon: Online, Tribes: Ascend, Ghost In The Shell: Stand Alone Complex - First Assault Online, No More Room In Hell, The Typing Of The Dead: Overkill, Rise of the Incarnates, Squad, Infestation: Survivor Stories, Dirty Bomb, Golf With Your Friends, on the arcade machines are the actually real tone-deaf Playing History: Slave Trade educational tetris style game, Who's Your Daddy I played with Stevey and Pissjugs, Bollywood Wannabe I watched, suitably, m0nde play on skype and Hey Baby, a cat caller shooting sim, with my gender swap avatar on the poster I made an amazingly scripted youtube video of, there's a random gamer joker funkopop as a parody of how cringe those things are, user avatars included are BYOBgoblin as a winnable toy in the "catcha d-lister" game and 010110010101 as part of an arcade machine

Ruby enters the solo round.

RUBY
solo round? there's a masturbation joke in there somewhere too


Director's Commentary: saved a lot of gif making time by just editing in Matthew Fox's head on the ninja only when it's solo round time

Enraged chimp sounds can be heard in the distance.

CBERRY
gadamn whys there no black people in this movie? racist ass honkeys smh

amma kick yo ass like shaka zulu shoulda done to william wallace on deadliesr warrior



RUBY
uh oh its the Nigga Ninja I can never beat this guy
Director's Commentary: parody of the "Nega Ninja" in the movie

CBERRY
waaaaaaaw I cant believe I'm this gay ass fake ninja with two fuckin lines, first slavery and now this?

FUCK YOU RUBY YOU PECKAWOOD MUTHAFUCKA!
Director's Commentary: pronouncing "wow" as "waaaaaaaaaw" sarcastically drawn out is a verbal tick of cberry's I've found myself copying unintentionally, "first slavery and now this" is something Cberry once said to me as I was knocking him over with the fire engine hose in GTAV Online and it always stuck with me (as it caused me immense white guilt)


Director's Commentary: one of the last things I added 2 days before posting this thread was updating cberrys face here to be one where he's screaming which looks way funnier, only problem is I only started saving the .psd files for gifs by the Patel fight so I had to just place the new cutout head over the older cutout head with his afro still showing meaning I 1) did the white video game dev meme of only ever giving black people one hair style and 2) had to JUST fuck-up cberry's hairline to merge it with the older one, the worst thing a white barber can do to a black man, sorry!

RUBY
hes just too pro for me

TROLLINATOR
Would you like me beat this section of the game for you? I could install an aimbot, a wallhack or gain remote access to the server farm the game is hosted on to over-charge their uninterruptible power source's lead acid batteries to emit hydrogen gas and create a point of ignition by overclocking their circuit boards causing an explosion that would destroy the entire building along with every individual inside.
Director's Commentary: her plan here is in reference to a terror attack depicted in the amazing hacking tv show Mr. Robot that really captures how depressing but also badass epic internet shenanigans can be


Director's Commentary: super blurry in the background are posters for the games Warface and Miscreated, two generic shooter games I played once with Stevey, I think the only games I've played with other posters not refenced here are Lifeless and F.E.A.R. Online which are so obscure they don't even have any artwork for them left online lol, another arcade machine featured here is Flyff, a Korean MMO I played with m0nde, Ted Stevens, idiotska and aber, that's her character twerking for us at the bottom, this is literally the only MMO I've ever played and it was like 20 years ago rofl, click HERE to see my screencaps of it

RUBY
uhm... I think... I think that... we should... uhhh


Director's Commentary: the iphone virus flash ad game, which I miss since they were like random mini-game quicktime events for just using your browser, is now sponsored by BLACKED.COM since Cberry BLACKED me

INT. 2FJS.COM - EVENING

The FJS crew, now on their fourth URL, are meant to be practicing their posting routines but Ruby is moping about like an emo.

TEKNORAT
look alive maggots I've got us a posting gig!


Director's Commentary: IWCs Virgin Mary avatar can be seen more clearly, the joeyball is in reference to the user of the same name, forum collage in the background is from a G.I. Joe poster (click HERE to view it) and of the FJS crew as the cast of black sitcom A Different World (click HERE to view it) also note the brand name of the hi-fi is literally "lame brand" in the movie as they're still amatures, bravo Edgar Wright!

RUBY
alright sign us u-

TROLLINATOR
Wait! I need to know the time and location so I can secure the area of operations before I allow Ruby to post there. Tell me or I will crush your bones to dust like this!

TEKNORAT
crush my boner more like
Director's Commentary: in case you didn't get the joke the dialog is refering to Trollinator clenching her hands together as if she was breaking someone's bones and/or penis in the following pic

RUBY
just tell her or she'll go on about enhanced interrogation techniques for an hour



TEKNORAT
it's wednesday on forumicon and even better it's part of the YSBT

TROLLINATOR
The YTMND Spin-off Battle of the Trolls?

TEKNORAT
yeh something stupid like that, rootbeer was texting me as his wife was in labor about how he wanted a bj from her and then he was like hey tek my forum is dead as fuck do you know some funny posters? and I was like I'm a funny poster and he was like you're a funny poster? and I was like yeah I'm the funniest australian poster in the history of the internet
Director's Commentary: the first half of this line is in reference to rootbeer actually texting Camoron as his wife was in labor moaning about now getting a BJ, just to let you know what a scumbag this dude is, second part of the line is in direct parody of the movie as a lot of this scene is

FANFARE
not saying much lmmfao

FAT STEVEY
is there a prize or something cus I need some green for my winnebago man and I aint talking bout da weed homie

TEKNORAT
only a posting contract with Robert G
Director's Commentary: this running joke about reno being refered to as "Robert G" (his real first name and initial) when Tek discusses who runs ALOL is a parody of Gideon's identity as the music industry big wig being obscured by his nickname "G-Man" in the movie

RUBY
who's that?


Director's Commentary: meme's here are another Mad Moxxi gun from Borderlands, also from there is an infinity pistol that did fuck all damage but I refused to stop using it, I wanted to find this bouncy ball firing shotgun I kept using to meme on Tek but I couldn't remember it's name so that'll have to do, the dildo weapon from Saints Row 3 we played together, a drum magazine for the AKM in DayZ we exploited glitches to dupe hundreds of, the passing truck outside is a smiley from FJS, on the mantlepiece is a box of noodles for macaroni and cheese I think Camoron cut out Matthew Fox's head to stick it on for a pic for me, the collages are a parody of a fan poster for the Avengers movie I posted I think when I posted a bunch of half-made projects like my Avengers 1 review where I only did the opening click HERE to view it, a LOST poster I actually never published as I intended to post it for my season 6 review threads I never madeclick HERE to view it and this Hot Fuzz poster of all the British posters that Vitafin made click HERE to view it and a Lost collage of "the ytmnsfw rescue squad" because this was one of the many times stevey had left the forum "forever" and me and those four posters were trying to cyber stalk him to figure out if he was still alive or what click HERE to view it

TEKNORAT
only the forum troll of the millennium

TROLLINATOR
Is it someone who I should kill?

TEKNORAT
if we win it wont just be trollinator wearing fjs shirts... it'll be actual human beings with free will too!
Director's Commentary: fond of that joke there, feel like I must be ripping it off from futurama or something


Director's Commentary: Trollinator's t-shirt here is a parody of the Sex Bob Bomb shirt Knives wears in this scene, the sunglasses on the shelf are in reference to the #wop chatter "sungod" as that's the brand name, the DVDs on the shelf in the background are A Serbian Film, Stoker, Get A Job, Compliance and The Hatred, movies I've watched with Deso but forgot to add them to the previous huge shelf full of DVDs gag, there's another Mad Moxxi gun in the corner, maybe I shoulda mixed up what kinda Borderlands guns there are laying around or used iconic guns from other games but we really did put almost all our free time for weeks on end into doing Mad Moxxi's thunderdome wave survival bullshit, there's a bottle of stevey's Gout Meds on the shelf that are a reference to THIS Lost thread promo image, collages seen here are a DayZ promo pic I just took the text off to stop it from looking too anarchonastic click HERE to view it, a pic of gender swap me, Trollinator and the FJS posters at an internet cafe from T:SCC click HERE to view it, a T:SCC collage I made when I made gifs out of that show click HERE to view it and some LOST collage click HERE to view it

TROLLINATOR
Would you like me to terminate the competition? I could make their deaths appear to be accidents. I could arrange heart attacks, robberies gone wrong, stage suicides, plane crashes, autorotic asphyxiation, falls from high places, car accidents, train collisions, motorcycle fatalities-
Director's Commentary: all these murder methods are in reference to the order they appear in in the viral conspiracy theory The Clinton Kill List

RUBY
uh I have to cum-I mean pee


Director's Commentary: her shirt has been positioned so that it reads as "cunny", a /tv/ pedo meme, I also tripled up the K for Knives on her necklace so it's KKK which is funny since racism is funny, only now do I notice I missed the FJS letters on the Sex Bob-Omb poster but am too lazy to change it now

TROLLINATOR
Who will you be forum battling? Please list all of their real names and addresses.

TEKNORAT
Gush and The Trolled
Director's Commentary: parody of the band in the movie's anme "Crash and The Boys", this was actually referenced in my hunger games generator thread all the way back in 2015, click HERE to view it

FAT STEVEY
that one circle jerk with Gush and those two fags she trolled?

FANFARE
who the fuck is gush?


Director's Commentary: I chose the most anarchonastic collages to put in the super blurry background here like THIS Suicide Squad collage I made for me and Deso's Suicide Squad commentary (click HERE to listen to it) and a collage I made I think again for my half-made Avengers thread out of a poster I have on my wall IRL for Age of Ultron click HERE to view it

FAT STEVEY
gush is so hot I wish she'd post on fjs.click
Director's Commentary: this was FJS's fifth URL

TROLLINATOR
I will eliminate her. What is her real name?


FAT STEVEY
wasnt her first name heidi... or am I thinking of barrys chicken?

TEKNORAT
which came first, the chicken or the troll?

FAT STEVEY
hahahahahhahahahahahhhhhhhaahahhaha <-fake laughter


Director's Commentary: blurry collages in the background here are for the shit game H1Z1 that actually started the battle royale craze click HERE to view it that I made to promote my trailer I made for a series of videos I never got around to publishing kek click HERE to view it a collage I'm quite proud of that I made for Game of Thrones ending click HERE to view it I posted in my megathread reviewing the whole series click HERE to read it a collage from Captain America: Civil War to commenorate the end of the Rubynet civil war where Marks98 waged guerilla war against the forums to get Plug Drugs banned and I refused to give into his terrorism until PD heroically sacraficed himself just like Bucky would do click HERE to view it and another YTMNSFLondon meet-up picture that I'd already used a better version of it on the fridge click HERE to view it

Ruby pees, not on cam, in a bottle or in duxx's mouth, but normally. Actually he pees sitting down irl, lol gayboi.
Director's Commentary: I actually do, it's just so easier



After he's done he finds himself back in highschool. Uh oh, time to get stuffed in lockers.
Director's Commentary: I actually don't remember any bullying in my school, just tough guys mutually fighting to seem cool and everyone insulting each other constantly, Teknorat had an intersting theory that this is because everyone brought knives to school lmao so if anyone took banter too far into harassment or beat up some weak kid they might end up stabbed, so that's my solution to end bullying, arm the kids



RUBY
oh god I'm back in highschool I better pretend to be sick so they send me home... wait I'm old as fuck what am I doing here... aw shit niggy I must be dreaming, fuck yes I'm lucid, alright, wheres the first hot bitch I can rape?
Director's Commentary: I could write a novel about all the shit I get up to when lucid dreaming (mostly rape) but I'll save that for another thread


Director's Commentary: the poster on the locker is an anti-vampire propaganda poster from True Blood, the silhouettes are of Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold the most iconic U.S. highschoolers

Ruby spots the hottest bitch ever Desolation gliding through his dream.

He chases after her, trying to rape her, but that gay dream thing happens where it feels like he's running through jell-o.



He sees her about to enter the Gay Tank.


Director's Commentary: the active shooter alarm is an actual real thing from a real U.S. highschool lmaoooo, the chart on the wall is a satirical racist evolutionary tree I got from 4chan and the poster on the wall is for Video Game High School season 3, a youtube show I took some inspiration from in how it melds standard young adult drama with hightened reality action just like this thread

INT. THE GAY TANK - MORNING

RUBY
holy fuck I just dreamed the future like Desmond from Lost! or like Angela from Heroes which is a lot less cool! maybe this will come in handy later... nah!
Director's Commentary: reference to me unironically divining StompleB's real name in a dream for real

Ruby rushes to the main page of the Gay Tank just as Deso browses inside.



DESOLATION
Uhh... ruby c-calaber? I think this is spelled wrong?
Director's Commentary: rubycalaber was the first username I ever came up with for Warcraft 3 since I thought "ruby" was something rare and special and "caliber" was a cool gun word but I misspelt it but havn't changed it in 18 years and I ain't gonna now

RUBY
hi I was thinking about asking you if you wanted to be my internet girlfriend but then I realized how pathetic that would be so do you want to be my internet girlfriend?

DESOLATION
Um... I just thought I'd check out your Pink Floyd thread.
Director's Commentary: in reality Deso was the one who started flirting with me since I am such a Chad



RUBY
I just woke up and you were in my dream I dreamt that you were going to read my thread but then I realized its probably not real since my thread sucked and it became a lucid dream and then I tried to rape you in my dream but I woke up before I could is that weird?

DESOLATION
It's not weird at all.

RUBY
it's not?


Director's Commentary: the rooster is the avatar of one of rubynet's newest users One Cock, represents one of the many chickens Barry fucks, "warning: gay fags inside" is a big spoiler

DESOLATION
Lots of guys want to rape me, mostly because I'm so smolderingly hot, but also because they are intimidated by my superior taste in music.



RUBY
right right

DESOLATION
Oh, I forgot everyone in the Gay Tank is gay.

RUBY
you dont remember me do you? we met at the tinychat party the other day

DESOLATION
You're the Lost guy?

RUBY
no! not even! that was some total meganovice on a parody alt I was the uh cool funny poster

DESOLATION
Can you just let me read the Pink Floyd thread?

RUBY
but if you do you'll see all I wrote was "pink floyd sounds like the nickname a guy would give his genitals lol" and posted a pic of keith giving barry a handy and then you'll neg rep me and leave



DESOLATION
Well if it's that NF I'll just leave now.

RUBY
ok well maybe do you want to chat on steam together sometime? get to know each other? you uh like Lost? I've watched every episode at least 15 times not that I'm autistic or anything
Director's Commentary: LOST number there obv

DESOLATION
You want me to chat on steam with you?

RUBY
uh... yeah if you have steam, I have aim and msn and skype and yahoo chat and irc and I'm online on all of them all day every day... not that I'm a loser or anything
Director's Commentary: RIP three out of these five chat programs lol

DESOLATION
If I say yes will you let me read your damn Pink Floyd thread?



Ruby scrambles at approximately light speed to update his thread with funnier jokes, lets Deso read it and promptly deletes it so it doesn't ruin his only listens to his own racist rap songs gimmick.


Director's Commentary: if you look closely the thread really is just a picture of Keith jacking off Barry, I took this screencap from 2010 on the forums when I had Admin so gave myself a huge picture name and a huge avatar of me as a rockstar to go along with the 10 songs I had just posted, what I am editing the thread too is I thiiiiink this autistic rant Jon went on where he reviews an episode of CSI for gun accuracy, not sure why I picked that and not one of my own threads or something like that, I guess I considered it even more autistic than my own work back in 2011 when I made this gif

RUBY
so yeah four o'clock becuase that's a Lost number? that's four in the morning (since I have no real sleep schedual, actually this biologist at Yale theorized that my body has no circadian rhythm because I've gone for years without exposing myself to regular UV light, interesting stuff) my time since americans are in like a three-layer time dilation field where they cannot ever under any circumstances tell you what time it is for them since you refuse to use the 24 hour clock, never mention what timezone you are in and never mention if you have daylights savings time or no-ok sorry I'll stop now


Director's Commentary: those are all valid complaints, well done past me who wrote that rant, also ROY4L really did theorize that about me and I think he might be right since everyone else who's sleep schedual changes as much as mine seems to feel like shit about it, like jet lag and such, but I don't mind like staying up for 14 hours and then sleeping for 10 hours so I'm waking up 2 hours later each day until two weeks later when I'm waking up at the same time I did a fortnite ago which does make planning to be awake for anything a bitch, see: my DayZ career

EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS - NIGHT

Listen to this song to set the holiday season ambience!



RUBY
so why have you been lurking these dead ass forums all night?

DESOLATION
I was totally waiting for you to message me.

RUBY
oh, I was waiting for you to message me, I was too nervous in case you 0 replied me, in fact I almost never message anyone first ever

DESOLATION
Well maybe you shouldn't be such a bitch.


Director's Commentary: I really don't message anyone first since I even find talking to people on the internet an effort lmao

Ruby and Desolation browse the dead forums, posting together.

RUBY
oh you wanna see the troll squad B team? they're pretty obscure gimmicks, only posted a few times each, I mean I think Narnar Narwhale only posted like once, and obscure things means it's cool right?

DESOLATION
These are all ironically bad right?

RUBY
no the bad ones didn't even get hired, like American Bald Eagle, Aspie Asp, Gif Giraffe, Incoherent Iguana, Copy Paste Parrot, I thought that one coulda made the cut but his gimmick got taken by Copypasta Capybara, one of the unofficial troll squad members

AMERICAN BALD EAGLE
DUMBASS EUROCUCK CANT UNDERSTAND TIMEZONES YOU DONT DESERVE OUR QUALITY AMERICAN MADE POSTS ON YOUR TROLL TEAM USA USA USA!!!
Director's Commentary: ultra rare never before seen or ever used again multi-color posting gimmick for a Troll Squad member

DESOLATION
Wait there's... more of them?


Director's Commentary: the second wave of Troll Squad members seen here are GOAT Goat, Implying Imperial Eagle, Anime Ant Eater, Umad Unicorn, Bullshit Bull (seen in a cuck shed, as Bull is cuck terminology for the dude that fucks ur wife), Earrape Ape and Narnar Narwhale and Shock Shark bursting out of what I am p sure is just the ground in the movie but let's pretend it's a frozen lake here, they never really took off like the OG 6 (White Bear, Reply Sloth, Care Frog, Unfunny Bunny, Rage Rex, Zoy Zebra) since they didn't have as easy to establish personalities as those six, literally like how the OG 6 Avengers are still the best characters in the MCU lol, Aspie Asp (has the autism awareness logo on his grenade), Gif Giraffe (has a bunch of my Lost gifs as ammo), Copy Paste Parrot (has a keyboard with just Ctrl, C & V) and Incoherent Iguana (with a Reject Haven tattoo, a lizard forum) were all ideas I've had for like a decade for new Troll Squad members but never got around to making them sigs and introducing them so this is their probably only time in the sun, I also had an idea for a troll squad member Bad Goy Gramps where my grandfather would share his antisemitic opinions but then he died and I didn't want to disrespect his memory *makes thread making fun of like at least ten people who have died*, the lynching victim represents user FUCKJEW who never had an avatar but posted that smiley

RUBY
yeah like fanmade ones, it's a whole franchise extended universe sorta deal at this point really, shoulda copyrighted it, that Prim Cube Goutmonkey is going places

HOMOPHOBIA HOG
only to hell with all you other homos
Director's Commentary: his posting color is the same as the warning sign on his signature since m0nde never gave him his own posting color, lazy paki

RUBY
so... how'd you end up on ytmnsfw?

DESOLATION
I just needed a funny forum I guess.

RUBY
oh yeah? came to the wrong place...

DESOLATION
I've got a good gimmick going here and Reno always said ytmnsfw was easy to troll.


Director's Commentary: yes these are really all fan-made Troll Squad members, there's ones made by marks98 (Manfare Manatee, GNU-Linux, Sarcastic Sock Puppet, Ignorant Hamhock, Desolation Dude (spoiler warning!), Garfield's Girlfriend, the blurry version of Minecraft Mongoloid to make fun of minecraft's graphics and Abusive Redneck Asshole commenting on Jon and Cag's marriage), m0nde (Ephebophile Oil Drum Homophobia Hog, Assembly Language Anvil, Prim Cube Goutmonkey making fun of stevey's obssession of Second Life, normal Minecraft Mongoloid) Elezzzark (Internutt Internet Retard User), Internutt (Posting Internet Monster), Barry (Rawdog Rainbow Fish), Desolation (Pretentious Prawn) and bob hughes (Copypasta Capybara) and there's even more but they're elsewhere in the thread, I think the only fanmade Troll Squad members I havn't included, since they're just too similar to posters, was Reno's "reno calaber" to parody me, fanfare's "faNFare & haylie loftin" and Marks98's edit of White Bear with Trumps hair, easter egg is the shed saying "free candy" near the minecraft creepers since that community is full of pedos

RUBY
is reno... you're internet boyfriend?

DESOLATION
He's... a friend... from Austin like me

RUBY
was he your internet boyfriend?

DESOLATION
Do you mind if we don't get into that right now?

RUBY
no I dont care I mean I dont give a fuck at all I mean about about stuff like that you know I care a lot about everything else you talk about yeah

so um.... why's everyone in this community from austin? like clay and jon and cag and garfield and gush and terror baby and lolwhales and general doli are all from there too
Director's Commentary: all these posters really are all from around the Austin area, it's weird

DESOLATION
I guess we're just all... on the austin spectrum XP
Director's Commentary: proud of myself for this one



They wander the dead forum together, looking for funny threads (there are none).

DESOLATION
So what about you? What do you do?

RUBY
oh uh I'm always up to something cool

DESOLATION
Cool, like what?



RUBY
like I'm always writing a megathread about something or making some gifs or having some epic gaming night with the lads or something like that

DESOLATION
No I mean in real life.

RUBY
hahahahaha

oh wait you're serious

yeah I uh I pretty much have no life I dont go to school I dont have a job I have one friend I see a movie with once a year I'm pretty much done with real life forever


Director's Commentary: completely accurate description of my life, also Deso is wearing a ring in reference to Pink Floyd's The Wall here

DESOLATION
Real life can suck I guess.

RUBY
is that why you left alol?
Director's Commentary: had to go back to the house party scene and edit in someone mentioning ALOL after realizing no one mentioned Deso used to post there, which I don't think she ever did IRL, saved myself from a plot hole but cemented an inaccuracy, thus is the struggle of writing a script

DESOLATION
Pretty much, just time to post on somewhere a little less real lifey.

RUBY
well there's sure as fuck no real life here haha

DESOLATION
lolololllol


Director's Commentary: this screenshot is from a deleted scene from the DVD where Ramona smokes that I wanted to use to make reference to how Deso smoked when we first started chatting (and thankfully quit since then), there was a joke in the movie they never did where a black censor bar appears over the cig as a reference to anti-smoking in movies regulations around the world, and I lost the original frames in my photoshop files somehow so had to edit in the same heads again when I decided to try to make the lighting of the faces and objects I edited in match the frame so that's why the cig and swing chain are slightly brighter around the edges that's me poorly erasing new darker faces over the non-lighting adjusted bright faces since I was too lazy to get the DVD out and take the screencap again for a blank version to work on

RUBY
I mean cus the forum is totally dead as fuck

DESOLATION
Yeah I got it.

You got any more of those troll force things?

RUBY
well there's the Robot Patrol but we're not really on good terms, long story... not cringy and NF or anything, just long

...oh and the Zombie Hoard but they are too cringy and NF to post
Director's Commentary: Zombie Hoard is a whole third faction type of gimmick characters like the Troll Squad and Robot Patrol that I came up with all these ideas for gimmicks based off of L4D zombies when that game was huge, considered releasing them from the confinement of my computer onto the forums when DayZ was my big thing but never really found the time

DESOLATION
Nah I love zombie things, like L4D!
Director's Commentary: the game we first met in IRL, considered different ways to bring that idea into this thread, like maybe showing Colombus and Emma Stone meeting in Zombieland since Deso liked that movie enough to get me to megathread review it, but the meet-cute satire in this movie was just too good to make more accurate to real life

SMOKER SMOKER
hey ashbreath *cough hack cough* smokers are 23 times more likely *cough hack hack* to develop lung cancer
Director's Commentary: a real stat but also a LOST number, special shout out to Smoker Smoker for being the only Zombie Hoard member to ever get a line, and he sure as shit will be the last too!

DESOLATION
Scratch that.


EASTER EGG EXTRA: a previous version of this image (before I found the smoking joke in a DVD extra) got corrupted when my harddrive did a funni and it ended up looking like THIS., also I considered making an extra post after this thread is done of like DVD style extras of little behind the scenes info (and at one stage I was collecting leaked nudes of every actress in this thread to post but ended up seeming too coomer even for me) but I decided to just hide it in this directors commentary type thing

Deso and Ruby continue to wander alone through the forums. Wow, this is one dead ass fucking forum, even the zombies are bored.

DESOLATION
This is ridiculous, isn't this the time of year everyones stuck indoors? Why's this place so dead? ALOL gets more posts during the summer.

RUBY
I know, I don't even know why I come here anymore... this whole thing sucks so fucking bad

DESOLATION
I think an obscure troll forum being dead is a pretty decent excuse for a lousy first internet date.

RUBY
so this is an internet date eh?

DESOLATION
Did I type internet date? Slip of the fingers.

RUBY
fingers...

oh I have something to show you


Director's Commentary: say hello (and goodbye) to the Zombie Hoard troll team, these guys were all ideas I had for gimmick characters like a decade ago but never used so this is yet another autistic as fuck in-joke I have with literally only myself, there's Screamer Screamer who's so obscure he's based off of a concept art infected from L4D they never put in the game but I would have had him link people to "screamer" jump scare prank videos, Deaf Construction Worker who's immune to pipebomb beeps in the game due to his hearing protection who'd troll Elz for being deaf, Uric Acid Spitter who'd troll stevey's gout, Common and Current Common Infected in reference to Elezzzark using that weird turn of phrase, Epic Fail Fallen Survivor idk making fun of survivalists I guess, Scat Mud Man who'd post scat porn, Jerk-Off Charger who'd basically be the modern Coomer meme, Tanty Tank making fun of Lisa having tantrums, Munter Hunter making fun of Roflbrothel calling other forum girls ugly munters, Boomer Boomer making fun of Baby Boomers, SWATing SWAT who'd threaten to SWAT people, Jewish Jimmy Gibbs Junior who'd be a jewish sterotype, Jenkem Jockey who'd just post about huffing jenk, K-Pop Cop who'd be a spamming K-Pop stan, Ebola HAZMAT who'd shitpost about whatever the latest pandemic was, Emo Witch who'd be emo, Bulimic Boomette who we used to joke looked like m0nde's ex wife and would post about eating disorders and Juggalo Clown who'd make fun of Cag having been a juggalo and Lisa having been in the circus

RUBY
happy birthday! it took me ages to make


Director's Commentary: one of the many cute and not at all weird and psycho signs I've made for deso over the years, my parents were very confused as to why I was celebrating a negative concept like "desolation"

DESOLATION
Wow, yeah, that must have taken hours to photoshop.

RUBY
photoshop?

DESOLATION
You'd have to be a complete psycho to march around in the freezing snow all night for someone stranger you just met on the internet.

RUBY
uh y-yeah h-heh right... thats the joke!



DESOLATION
Anyway, I think there's a thingy over here somewhere.

RUBY
a thingy?

DESOLATION
A private steam chat <3


Director's Commentary: note the deso x-mas steam avatar and steam chat window lay-out circa a decade ago

DESOLATION
Come on!


Director's Commentary: her steam avatar is of Lindsay Lohan which foreshadows a certain change coming up in this thread

INT. A PRIVATE STEAM CHAT WITH DESO - NIGHT

Deso starts to unwind while Ruby starts getting nervous like an aspie retard.

DESOLATION
What kind of NFTs do you like?

RUBY
I only like funny ones, like "I went outside once, the graphics sucked", my dad gets me one for my bday each year
Director's Commentary: play on the forum lingo NF meaning Not Funny and my collection of graphic t-shirts that my dad would buy me and I had to ask him to stop cus they were too cringe even for me

DESOLATION
Well I LOVE NTFs. I have the Bored Apes SS Officer, Lindsay Lohan's Fursona, Azealia Banks/Ryder Ripps Sex Tape, Jake Paul's StickDix, Logan Paul's CrytoZoo, William Shatner's Teeth X-Ray, The Original & Official Creepy-Chan, The 1st Tweet, Destiny N-Word Clip, Trump Digital Trading Cards, Snoop Dogg's Ethereum Metaverse Harlem Globetrotters Sitcom Private Party Pass, StoneToss Flurks, 1 of 1 Ultra Rare Homer Pepe, a Mozambique gun from Deaddrop aaaaaand whatever Matt Damon was shilling, all screen-shotted of course!


Director's Commentary: only until the final readthrough of this thread this dialog sequence was just lazy parodies of the types of tea Ramona reads out in the movie, turning "blueberry, raspberry, ginseng, sleepytime, green tea, green tea with lemon, green tea with lemon and honey, liver disaster, ginger with honey, ginger without honey, vanilla almond, white truffle, blueberry chamomile, vanilla walnut, constant comment and earl grey" into "bluescreenberry, rapeberry, cberry, jin dies, rapeytime, weed tea, weed tea with lesbians, weed tea with lesbians and strap-ons, internutt's liver disaster, ginger with souls, ginger without souls, activated almonds, white power, cberry chamomile, vanilla gorilla, common and current aaaaand earl gay." not my best work, I considered leaning into it with a line like "I love tryhard forced tea in-jokes" or maybe classic rock bands Deso would list I'd have no idea what she's talking about but I actually do have no idea what she'd be talking about to even list them and have already extinguished my "music deso likes" references elsewhere in this thread and then I remembered THIS meme of a caller trolling this weird scam artist guy who couldn't explain what an NFT is by rambling about boba tea until it turned into asking what an NFT is, joke is highly anachronistic since NFTs only started in 2014 and most of these are references from the last few years but it's a big improvement on what would have been the weakest parody imho, think you can just google most of the NFTs for explinations since yes they are all real, all I feel I need to add is Ryder Ripps used to be a big ytmnder/IRC artfag crewer, streamer Destiny got into internet trouble for saying NFTs are a scam and then selling clips of his stream as his own NFTs, the Mozambique is a meme in the Apex Legends community for being the shittest gun and Deaddrop is Dr. Disrespects terrible FPS where the guns are NFTs and the Homer Pepe is reference to THIS CHAD from the Feels Good Man pepe documentary, screenshotting NFTs is considered grand e-larceny, she lists 15 nfts like how Ramona lists 15 teas, also the ghost cake on the table represents the user "GeistCake@FORUM" and the muffin represents Deso's friend Muffin
EASTER EGG EXTRA: this is another image that my harddrive did a wonky and turned it into THIS. which I thought looked very artfaggy

RUBY
uuuh do you get irn bru ones?

DESOLATION
What the hell is "iron brew"?

RUBY
it's this scottish drink, it's called that because it has loads of iron in it from the sheep blood it's made from, and I think some nessie semen too
Director's Commentary: set-up for a vegan related joke later on


Director's Commentary: the sign in the background is in reference to how I once saw a van with that epic Pink Floyd logo as a decal on the back and I made my mum stop the car in a snowstorm so I could write a note on a page from her diary "gotta love the classics" and stick it on it for a pic for Deso in reference to the catch-phrase of her alt Paul_, click HERE to view it

DESOLATION
Alright, let's get this shit started: >yuros

J/K, all this talk of cum is getting me hot... you want to see some racy pix of me?

RUBY
uhhh uhh uhhh y-yeah sure I mean if you want to

DESOLATION
Lemme put on some tunes!


Director's Commentary: this shot is actually from the blooper reel of the movie since I spotted a Fargo poster in the back and thought it'd make a good autistic easter egg since Mary Elizabeth Winstead goes on to star in the tv show of that movie that Deso and I watched togehter, also some posters for Pink Floyd including for The Wall which's movie we watched like a decade ago

Deso puts on her favorite white girl raper, I mean rapper, Riley Reid's latest (gang) banger.
Director's Commentary: reference to the GoT term for a rapist and porn actress Riley Reid literally admitting to rape in a sex advice video no career, social or legal consequences of course SQUAD W


Director's Commentary: Deso once posted this video on the forums, which I replied to with a pic of my Riley Reid fleshlight

Deso goes to shuffle through her imgur account while Ruby stands around like an awkward nerd.

Deso links Ruby to some hot selfies.

RUBY
wwoaaahaah oh jeez th-thats uh thats uh p-pretty uh hot and stuff heh yeah

DESOLATION
The strap-on? Or the self-sucking?

RUBY
uh I-I mean uh both? I do both, I mean I could do both


Director's Commentary: the tattoo on Deso's back is from Taylor Swift's You Need To Calm Down music video, media referenced here are the book for 50 Shades of Grey which's movie adaptations we've watched together, DVDs for other movies we watched together like Apocalypse Now in the handbag, ATM, The Spy Who Dumped ME, I Care A Lot, Cruella, The Little Things, Hounds of Love, Velvet Buzzsaw, BlacKkKlansman, Doctor Sleep, Cobain: Montage of Heck, Frozen (the shit one), The Suicide Squad, Sorry To Bother You, Judas And The Black Messiah on the closet shelf and on the shelves Thoroughbreds, Enemy, A Nightmare On Elm Street, Charlies Angels, Dune, Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn), Promising Young Woman, I Spit On Your Grave, Unfriended, Miss Americana, Dirty Grandpa, BrainDead, The Invisible Man, Black Swan, The Forever Purge, Reservoir Dogs, Wedensday which we watched 1 ep of, A Way Out a game we played half of and Baldur's Gate II in reference to us playing the third on the shelf, The Departed, a VHS for Silence of the Lambs one of desos fav movies that we havn't watched yet but we watched the first ep of the lame Clarice show lol, a poster for Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas we watched together, Half-Life 2 we played a co-op mode of together, Minecraft which we played with Stomple and posters for movies from before 2010 we've watched together Broson, Shutter Island (which we did a commentary of, click HERE to listen to it), Poessession, Carriers which was infamous between us as terrible but is now actually 100% realistic looking back post COVID, the based anime movie Redline which is FREE on youtube somehow lol and of course the classic movie Mean Girls, users referenced here are "feerie" as the perfume because that's it's brand name, "CreepingThong" as the thong that say "daddy's lil monster" in reference to Suicide Squad that we watched together, "jakino" as the sunglasses which is it's brand name and "paperflowers" as the uh paperflowers and m0nde's fanmade Troll Suqad members Password Protected Panties and Javascript Jodphurs in the closet, other Deso related easter eggs are a poster of Battersea Power Station from the Pink Floyd album, a poster Deso for Alex Tyde's "flying lobster podcast" she has appeared on, named after a drug trip Alex had where he saw a lobster fly and then thought fanfare was trapped inside his computer lmao, real nail varnish and real lipstick of Deso's that have appeared in various signs for me, some make-up, scrunchy, lipbalm jar, glasses, skirt and a handbag that appeared in YTMND's she's made, a t-shirt of Marilyn Monroe that Deso saw being worn by literally a teenage boy Bryan Singer molested and we spent ages trying to find it online to buy and even considered contacting the poor guy, a cringy t-shirt that says "Jack Bauer could make it off the LOST island in 24 hours" which is the kind of graphic tee my dad used to buy me, a book labeled "my trolling book report" with the very label user momthinksimcool held up for a weird gimmick that she was writing a book report on trolling as her excuse to post on the forums and everyone thought and still thinks that Deso is one in the same as this girl, another poster Deso made for her friend from another message board called the TL;DR, on the shelf is the Burn Book from Mean Girls, the two cats are her two cats as kittens Bowie and I forget the other one's name, on the shelf is Deso's ticket to Taylor Swifts Era's Tour in Argentina and a notepad Deso doodled on webcam once on the floor, she's holding a real Miley nude that references me sucking my own dick from a collection of other real Miley nudes that I added at the last second since I forgot I wrote in a line about her showing me nudes above this pic over a decade ago, on the bed is a meme brand of crisps (not chips, dumb yankoids) "Tankies" making fun of the extremist communists shitting up the internet recently, a D20 ballgag in reference to deso and me enjoying DnD content, Taylor Swift's cheerleader uniform logo in the wardrobe, there's REAL Lockheed Martin pride flag socks and the lamp is Kansas City Chiefs merch, Deso's NFL team, with the number of Travis Kelce who Taylor is currently dating

EASTER EGG EXTRA: another image that got corrupted into THIS modern art at some stage, you can also see the mspaint esque notes I make on where to photoshop in items and references, just like George Lucas drawing with highlighters all over artists storyboards but at least I have the good graces to do it in a layer I can remove after

DESOLATION
You've had cyber sex before, right?

RUBY
WHAT? me?! of course not! wh-why w-would I-!

Ruby totally sperges out hardcore.


Director's Commentary: poster behind me is for Requiem For A Dream, a movie we did a commentary on together, and in the background is a real painting Deso has of Mary Elizabeth Winstead and I think another real painting she has of Taylor Swift

DESOLATION
Oh, I thought you had cyber sex all the time? You said so in your guest news post on the front page.
Director's Commentary: something Deso unironically said to me during one of our first cyber sessions since I had joked about cybering all the hot forum girls in the YTMND guest post Max let me write when one of my sites was on the History Channel (click HERE to read it)

RUBY
th-that was just a joke! oh jeez oh jeez oh jeez
Director's Commentary: if you think me saying oh jeez over and over again when overwhelmed by a sexual situation is a reference to 50 Shades of Grey you're wrong, I had already been saying oh jeez for years before the release of that "book" after copying it from Starguard who would say that when pretending to be stuck on a ladder to get his teammates killed when trolling in Left4Dead, E. L. James probably stole it from me like how she ripped the whole book off from twilight fanfictions

DESOLATION
Here, let me relax you.


Director's Commentary: background was too blurry for me to bother shooping in all the other posters that appear later

RUBY
r-relax me how?

Desolation slowly runs her delicate little hands underneath Ruby's trousers and starts to caress the bulge in his underwear.

RUBY
oh oh like that uh ok uh think that might do the opposite of relax me just to let you know

DESOLATION
That's kind of the point!

Desolation locks lips with Ruby and the couple share an erotically charged kiss.



RUBY
so do we just like... type out what... we'd like do to each other and stuff?

DESOLATION
I guess...


Director's Commentary: media referenced here are movies we watched together The Breakfast Club, Deliverance, Death Proof, Full Metal Jacket, Happiness, Zodiac and Natural Born Killers which we did a commentary with Gabi on, there's posters for Pink Floyd material, in the mirror is an accurately flipped poster of The Notebook that appeared in a YTMND she made as well as the make-up on the table, there's a pic I made of iwascruel's avatar over Emile De Raven as she was cast as Claire in my LOST gifs, only now did I realize that that's the same pic I used for my sister's skype avatar, Deso's real life keychain with the Dota 2 symbol on it appears on the desk, in and under the box labeled "waifu shirts" are Taylor Swift shirts Deso really owns, the other boxes are references to things I know deso likes, and the artwork on the bed are Deso's real drawings, she's so talented!!! also on the bed is a juice box of Boom Boom Lemon, the cursed magic box from so bad it's good movie Wish Upon we watched together, a cute puppy I think was Deso's sisters idk I forget, a fictional drink from the movie Kate starring MEW we recently enjoyed since I couldn't find a mock-up DVD cover for it some autist eventually makes for digital only releases and a painting of Karlie Kloss her friend made for her

RUBY
I dont think you're quite ready for the massive loads of walls of text I can bust out when I need to

DESOLATION
I hope walls of text aren't the only massive loads of something you can BUST out when you need to <333

RUBY
what? I dont have a gun wh-oh you mean cum, ok yeah I can do that too


Director's Commentary: this really is how Deso and I chat to each other for years on end, I positioned the poster behind me so it looks like the all-seeing-eye is watching over us and the woman is between us almost like she's watching

EASTER EGG EXTRA: this image got corrupted in an especially wacky manner: HERE.

Ruby and Desolation climb into bed together, stripping each others clothes off as they go. It's a good thing Ruby's already naked when Deso gets down to her panties because he'd have cum his pants. They embrace, Deso giggles as she touches Ruby's skinny chest, she runs her slender fingers down his ribs like she's playing a xylophone. Wow, this is truly erotic literature at it's best.

Holy shit, DAT DESO ASS. Mmm and look at those round, plump, soft... toes!


Director's Commentary: media referenced here is Necroplasmosis, a movie a friend of Deso's made, movies we watched together D.E.B.S., Mulholland Drive, Eyes Wide Shut and The Slumber Party Massacre we made a commentary on, all chosen for this image for their erotic themes, the alarm clock is of course at the funny and sexual time of 69:69 and the object on the table is ummm Deso's real life uhhh hairbrush handle h-heh from a certain pic she sent me once, click HERE for a meme gif involving it and Miley, ontop of the clock is an Iron Man themed condom box in reference to my first MCU review thread

Their hands steadily roam over each other's body. Well, Deso's do, Ruby mostly just keeps his hands firmly on her forearms, as to not scratch her with his inch long nails. They lay down together, still kissing. Deso is on top which is fitting considering Ruby's pathetic nerd body is smaller than hers. Even his hands are smaller, what a soy boy. Oh, and Deso also has really nice boobas.



DESOLATION
I changed my mind.

RUBY
changed it to what? from what?

DESOLATION
I don't want to have cyber sex with you right now.

RUBY
ooooh ok

Deso lays beside Ruby, he tries to keep his raging hard-on under control. He doesn't, and pitches an epic tent.



RUBY
ok thats fine, I was probably too nervous to enjoy it anyway

DESOLATION
Wow you bitch, I'm playing hard to get, I want you to have your way with me anyway and overpower me and RAVISH me!

RUBY
wow thats uh thats uh I uh not sure I could over-power you so... how about we just cuddle for a bit?

DESOLATION
Fine then, I'll just rape you then.

RUBY
awwwww jeeeeeeeeeeeez


Director's Commentary: I like the original edit of the movie where Ramona just changes her mind about having sex while they're in bed and Scott respects it, unironically a positive non-rapey message you almost never see in mainstream movies without it being in the context of the girl being a bitch or an excuse for the guy to keep pushing and get his way, I of course made it a rape joke here since rape is funny (and hot when it's female on male)

INT. MY HOUSE - THE MORNING AFTER

Ruby's cat watches the sun rise on his massive effort sign outside.


Director's Commentary: rip my cat, she died when she was like 19 in the weirdest way where she just yelped and jumped in the air and died literally in mid-air and landed on her side with her paws still out stretched and mouth open, probably had an aneurysm or something, best way to go really, old and fast and with family, the album seen on the left is my dad's Jimmy Hendrix greatest hits, gotta love the classics!

INT. A PRIVATE STEAM CHAT WITH DESO - THE MORNING AFTER

Deso's gorgously slutty face is coated with shot after shot of creamy rubycum from last nights hot steamy cyber sex session!

DESOLATION
Wow. You weren't kidding about busting massive loads!


Director's Commentary: of course this is really a pic of my cum, note the artistic blob on the tooth brush

RUBY
what can I say? mac and cheese has a lot of protien in it!


Director's Commentary: this pic of the morning after in Ramona's room is actually from a deleted scene on the DVD which is why the quality is so low, just pretend it's the haze from the morning sunshine or something, media refernced here is a DVD for Gamer, the movie Deso and I watched before we first had cybersex (hilarously fitting since there's a long sequence in a sex club for human avatars remotely controlled by deranged obese loser coomer NEETs who use them to cybersex lmao), a DVD for The Shining which we watched together, well half of it, Deso fell asleep halfway through it was so boring lmaooo, a poster for 500 Days of Summer which we did a commentary of with Reno's ex-girlfriend lmao, a poster for movies we've watched together Jennifer's Body, Heathers and American Psycho and a fan-made poster for Community's first paintball episode I wrote an entire parody script for a megathread like this about the creation of rubynet but most of the jokes just fell flat so I harvested all the best lines and gags for this project, posters for movies we watched Sixteen Candles and the EU poster for Ferris Bueller's Day Off, a screencap of Deso's Final Fantasy 14 character, a painting tourettes streamer Sweet_Anita was sent of herself that Deso and I watch, a Lindsay Lohan mousemat that Deso really owns, an inforwars shirt in reference to how Deso unironically worked for Alex Jones's radio show about a decade ago, a poster from a nightmare in Life is Strange which I watched her play on some steam screen sharing thing, some life goals dream board thing Deso made for a meme, more make-up that's appeared in YTMNDs as well as the crucifix over the bathroom mirror, the Taylor Swift painting is another real thing Deso owns, on the bed is a magazine I doodled all over with cute references and flirting for her, on the PC monitor is a screenshot of Deso's WoW Classic character with the head being I think her regular WoW character's face she had me photoshop to have her eyes closed, the avatar of streamer Bloody we watch, the box for WoW which she's addicted to and her waifu harem she made for a /tv/ thread, on the mirror is a sign deso made for me where she wrote "ruby" on her shower door, on the door is a knife deso used to carve that tracing of "ruby" onto a tree, in the mirror is also a painting a girl deso fucked sent a pic of her nude while holding, a sketch of a dog Deso made, "Den of Iniquity" is a thread Deso made of e-girls making her signs, on my back is the angel wing scarification from Helena's back from tv show Orphan Black and a sticker saying "big d1ckerson energy" the catchphrase of the star player of Deso's fav basketball team

EXT. A PRIVATE STEAM CHAT WITH DESO - THE MORNING AFTER

RUBY
so what's with the rollerblades?

DESOLATION
A friend into rollerderby got me into them.
Director's Commentary: reference to iwascruel using some woman I think she knew irl who was into rollerderby as her avatar

RUBY
aint that the sport for lesbos?

anyway, can you not tell anyone about last night? I dont need barry to start up with that "was it rape" meme again
Director's Commentary: this meme reference is anachronistic by about 5 months since it's referencing the scene where Dany gets what she retroactively deserves in a rape scene in the liek third episode of Game of Thrones


Director's Commentary: the billboard is an ad for a stand-alone MP3 player Deso saw in Argentina, very naughtiespunk! the user hammocks avatar appears as 9/11 in the background, the road signs read "garland" and "I dare you to make it out of garland alive" that appeared in my massive futurama collage and are references to I think Garfield daring people to try and come fuck with him in that hood he lives at, the porcupine on the hedge is the user The Porcupine, on the white picket fence post is text that used to appear in Michael Wolfson's signature way back on the OG ytmnd forums as seen in THIS screencapture that I always appreciated, there's a poster for Paranormal Activity in the doorway which was the first movie I ever watched with Deso with StompleB there, it was so boring she fell asleep lol, also Deso's new dog

DESOLATION
Only if you take me on another date.

RUBY
are you sextorting me?
Director's Commentary: the extorting/blackmail exchange is in reference to Ben and Miles exchange on LOST

DESOLATION
Technically it's blackmail. I thought if you had a reverse-rape fetish you'd like that too.

You feel into it at least.


Director's Commentary: yes that is my real penis and yes it is a huge 7 incher, couldn't miss the opertunity when Ramona grasps the gate post right in front of Scott's crotch

RUBY
well if you like seeing me being dominated you should come watch me and the legendary fjs crew post in this trolling battle thing

DESOLATION
You post on FJS?

RUBY
yeah, we're terrible, please come?

DESOLATION
Again?

Sure.


Director's Commentary: hehehhhh sex joke ebinnnn

RUBY
oh wait! can I add you on instagram or somewhere? my myspace got hacked so anything but that
Director's Commentary: reference to a meme I did where I made it look like Juliet hacked my myspace, originally this line was asking for her facebook but it made a plot hole where I tell marks later on I don't have one, airtight writing tbh


Director's Commentary: idk if it's a production error or just the lighting but Ramona's usually blue star bag is actually orange in this scene but I put the star over it anyway

RUBY
wooooow... girl tumblr


Director's Commentary: I asked Deso what I should put for this scene without telling her directly what the project was and this is what she requested, looks like it's deleted now, also I forgot the seven Xs until my last passthrough of the images lol

DESOLATION
See you on the forums rubykins <3

RUBY
oh hey! it's tonight on fo-


Director's Commentary: the blooded shoe is Deso's after she stepped on a nail irl lol, the biker is user RetartedNiggerFagit's avatar great username, on the side of a house is user Bastard Factory with the logo for that lizard forum under it, inside are recent no-namers chuckles, Sandy. and Lokachola55 who I don't care enough to look up the IPs of who they are but from being noobs get the insult of being in Bastard Factory, also spambot CarolineMay who set their own avatar somehow and ytmnsfwer /b/lackup, note the signs pointing to forumicon and the one saying unfunny central, which all these forums are at, the giant imflatable pig is in reference to Pink Floyd, Deso's favorite band, on the bush is another of Deso's cats, also I had a meme idea to put a literal severed head Elz showed me a pic of that was left on his street and is the reason he moved to America from cartel controlled Mexican territory but releasing a picture of a decapitated mans head for the first time online is too edgy even for me