I heard Facebook had published a list of 71 genders but when I looked there were only 70. Someone's hidden a gender, if you ask me.
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I've discovered that I have a superpower. I can melt ice cubes just by staring at them. It takes a while though.
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Little Johnny walks into his dad's bedroom and sees him sliding on a condom. His father tries to hide it by bending over, as if to look under the bed. Little Johnny asks curiously "What are you doing, Dad?" His father quickly replies "I thought I saw a mouse go underneath the bed". Little Johnny replies "What are you gonna do? Fuck him?"
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I decided to go to the local Mosque for the first time, to see what it was all about. I sat down and the Imam came up to me, laid his hands on my hand and said: "By the will of Allah the All Mighty, and the Prophet Muhammad, you will walk today". I told him I was not paralysed... I can walk. He came back and laid his hands on me and repeated "By the will of Allah the All Mighty, and the Prophet Muhammad, you will walk today". Once again, I told him there is nothing wrong with me. After the prayers, I stepped outside and bugger me... my car had gone!